Husband assumes my inheritance is his?

You're right, it's yours. It's your choice what you want to do with it. Most of the answers you've gotten are pretty rude and retarded. My ex husband kept his inheritance a secret from me the last year of our rocky marriage, and I discovered it in the middle of our divorce. My lawyer made it clear that I had no rights to that money, never did. The "whats yours is mine, mine is yours" saying does not apply here.

I feel the same way as you do. If this happened to my current husband while we we happily married, I wouldn't feel entitled. I may expect him to do certain things for our kids, and would hope it would be family money, but would understand if he wanted to keep some in an account just for himself, just in case. Call it negative thinking, but **** happens!

If it were my inheritance, I would talk to a lawyer and find out what I could do to protect myself if need be in the future if I make certain investments.

Paying your house off would benefit you both....now. But, you never know what could happen 5 years down the road. People change. So, you invest all of your money into it, and he gets half if you sell during a divorce.

I'm sure the issue could have come up in a better way. You're human, it happens, people speak before they think. You could apologize for the way it came up, but be honest with him in the way you feel about it. And talk to a lawyer and see what you can have put in place to protect yourself if things take a turn for the worst in the future if you make a major investment.

Without knowing all the details about how the finances work in your marriage, I sort of always had the impression that when you are married – it’s for better or worse. Taking legalities out of the equation, a marriage is supposed to be built on equality not separation of status based on contributions. .

Now - if he were drafting his own person wish list, then maybe I would question if this were truly the best action for using the money. However, paying off a home sounds like reasonable recommended request that’s mutually beneficial to the both of you. Therefore, I wouldn’t be so hard on his intentions. After all, if he went out and hit the mega-millions, I am sure that as his spouse, you would hope to be included you in his brand new financial lifestyle.

Contact a lawyer. Depending on the laws in your area, even if your spouse isn't working, if they're somehow getting money from a spouse, partner, or family members, that's sometimes considered income that your kid should be getting support payments from. If you have reasonable expectation that he received a payment from an inheritance, you may be able to chase the inheritance for at least a partial payment of the back support. And if you can prove his family is complicit in helping him hide assets, a lot of people may be in trouble. You need to get in touch with the Attorney General (or whatever other agency in your area oversees child support non-payment resolution), and inquire about having your ex investigated.

this is your inheritance, not his. your not being selfish. the only way it would become mutual property is if you co mingled the inheritance with an account you both share. if you put it in a retirement account if there was a divorce he might get half of it in the divorce. legally he has no right to it, unless you co mingle it.

As long as you're married (with no pre-nuptial agreement in contradiction) what's yours is his and what's his is yours.

If you're more concerned with the inheritance than the marriage, divorce before the inheritance is necessary (again, as long as there is no pre-nup that specifically covers this).

Edit: "Legally" it depends on which state you reside in (assuming U.S.), how the will reads, and just how the inheritance is handled . . . regardless of how others (and yourself) "feel" about this . . . and if this is about feeling - think about you and your husband's relationship.

. . . and . . . "if I put it in paying off our house and then we divorced 10 years later?" . . . the house would probably be awarded to you (assuming kids) in the divorce so you would be likely to retain all that "you" put into paying off your family's house . . . rather telling (again) that you do not call it your (mutual) home.

If you use this money to pay off the house, it will take your husband off the hook, which is why he wants you to do this. The money is yours, to do whatever you want to do with it. It's money that comes from your father's heart, for his beloved daughter and your husband has absolutely no claim to it. You are not off base at all. You told your husband exactly what he needs to understand. The money is yours, and yours alone. You can certainly share it, if you choose to do so, but please put some aside for yourself. That's what your father would want you to do.

It doesn't matter if you are married and in a 50/50 state. Once a will states "TO YOU" in name--It is not mandated to be shared at all. It may have been wrong of him-It was wrong of you also. If this is how you fight over a technicality of finances, it won't matter--Take you money, you're going to need it soon.

2

1

Seriously, it is both of yours isn't it? Your husband was thinking about what use that money would be and how it could better both of your lives. He didn't say he was purchasing a Ferrari, he was thinking about both of you. Maybe in your marriage you don't have many things that are just yours. I have my own closet, my own office space, my own dresser, my own car etc.....I have enough of my own stuff. Maybe it would help if you had more "you" stuff. Just a guess here. Have a great day!