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Why do I feel like this, please help?
Its been two years. He proposed. I'm not sure what I'm feeling about him to be honest,, I mean I love him so much and care
about him but it's been difficult for me to be attracted to him physically recently and I
can't help but wanting to hangout with other people especially guys. He takes good care
of me and he is the only person who I was in relationship with and can imaging starting a
family with, but lately, I feel like i have been put in a fish tank, where safety and comfort
are promised, but I miss swimming in ocean, where I feel like I'm originally from. We are
opposite when it comes to personal space and commitment I feel like.
2 Answers
- 3 years ago
It's sounds like you feel smothered in this relationship - have you spoken to him about how you feel? You really should.
You say you find it hard to be attracted to him - ask yourself why is that? Is it something he can change? Has he become complacent lately? Or have you not been attracted to him from the very start and you've stayed in the relationship for security?
You must do what you feel is right for you. I think your first step is to explain this to him. Tell him what he needs to do to make you feel better and happier in this relationship - but I mean something actually TANGIBLE! e.g. "It makes me uncomfortable that if I don't answer your text you call me straight away... please give me time to respond" etc simple guidelines so that he KNOWS when he's crossing the line.
If you've done all this and you still feel the way you do now then it really is time to walk away. This is hard but you must be brave. It's nice to have security - but it will drive you insane if you're not happy and you WILL end up resenting him in the future. That's not fair for the both of you.
I hope whatever you decide to do, you do it with love in your heart x
