Are gay men who start a "normal" family with a wife and kids miserable until they embrace their true sexuality?

Speaking from personal experience - 30 years married to a woman with three children.  I can tell you that although I loved (and still do) my ex-wife, I am much happier as an "out" gay man than I ever was living a "normal" family life.  I wouldn't trade those years for anything.  I have three great children and a good friend in my ex-wife, but I feel much more real now that I am out.  I always felt as if I was living a role rather than being truly me.  Also, I always lived in fear that I would be outed by someone.  I wouldn't say I was miserable, but I wasn't real.  Now I am.

Some might be out of guilt while some may not be because they’re comfortable being an actively donating father to the kids. What kind depresses me about your question is what you claim is “normal”. As a bisexual you are probably more aware than most that sexuality is not defined as being “if you’re not heterosexual then the only other possibility is that you’re homosexual”.   

Spectrum. If autism can have one, so can sexuality. Unless you’re Mike Lindell. Damn pillow pushing weirdo. But I digress. 

Every guy is different. Some might have men on the side. Some guys just resolve to live out their role in society and don’t look back. Some might live through porn or imagination. 

But what ever the case - He’s not sexually fulfilled by his wife. He might love her to pieces as a friend - but it’s just not how he is.