Jessica

And other benefits?

I'm trying to figure out why I'm so screwed up when I came from parents who didn't divorce, had a large loving family with lots of siblings and I went to a Catholic school taught to do things the right way. Never had any huge tragedies and lived middle class.

When I was 6 I was jealous when my mom had a baby. I was the 5th child of 7 and before that I was always the baby. In my childhood I was a huge tomboy and struggled to be friends with "girly girls" Later in life i realized my attraction to women. I hid it from everyone. I always felt awkward and gawky, while my older sisters were popular, tiny and lots of friends. I hung around one best friend but she controlled everything but was a super nice person who would do anything for me. I've always felt immature. Later I got married and I raised his kids after his wife died. Then we had kids of our own. I divorced him after "coming out". He was pretty controlling, but in the end he gave me what I wanted in our marriage I just hated when he got jealous. Now I'm finishing raising my college kids with a woman that I married. I don't really love her-- I rushed into it and believed her when she said I would be happier being true to myself. I'm not even sure I'm a lesbian. We bicker constantly and fight more than w my ex husband. She gets jealous all the time. I've pushed all my friends away. I miss my old life with my ex and feel I can't un-do it all even though he would take me. I think I was just all so very confused.

How in the world do i compare? What is a HDHP??

My friend/former neighbor's son and my son have been friends since age 3. Actually I'm good friends with the Mom too. They moved to a more upscale neighborhood years ago because they are quite well off $. We've remained friends, and so have our boys. Our sons, in fact, are very close. Our sons just graduated high school. She had her party first and I gave $100. I had mine and she gave $75. If it were me I'd keep it the same amount---but since she's not me, I thought I'd post on here to get other opinions.

do you think there's a lot of ppl who hide it?

Hired a painter to paint inside of home, ceilings and walls. Surfaces of walls weren't patched and sanded properly. Ceiling lines uneven. Paint dried with drips and streaks. He applied paint improperly and edged the wall improperly---edges of walls dried a different shade causing a "picture frame appearance". Rather than re-painting the entire wall to correct, he merely painted over the edges. He blames Sherwin Williams and says the paint color of the two gallons were different. Sherwin Williams say he didn't combine the gallons together and improperly applied paint. He left our worksite for other jobs. He missed painting sections of walls. He was communicated this several times and he came back to fix twice. The total was $3630 and we paid him $1500. We feel his job was substandard and don't feel he has the professional capacity to complete the job to satisfaction.

My son is 20. I was divorced when he was 16 and later moved to another state with my new spouse. My son decided he wanted to live back at home with his grandma (against my wishes). His first semester at a community college, he barely attended classes so I had him withdraw and the school agreed to apply funds to the next semester. A girlfriend dumped him and he had trouble getting things together. He did this in high school, as well. Any problem that came his way, he wouldn't go to school. The next semester of college, he did it again--barely attending classes. When I questioned him, he would tell me to stop trying to control him, leave him alone, it's his decision, he's old enough. Later, he said he's afraid of failing. He would say in his mind the night before that he was ready for school. He would wake up and then be afraid to fail, hence why he doesn't attend. He's very confident (almost cocky) on the outside, but he claims he's afraid to fail, which is why he doesn't go to classes. He refuses any mental health. He went to a doctor before but feels anti depressants don't help, and he does not want drugs. My question is---now he is asking for money for the third semester. 3rd try. Do I give him the money. I feel like he's always giving false promises to attend school. Or do I stand firm and say no to the money? Let him learn the consequences by not giving him money. Or be a supportive mom and give the money and hope something clicks and he attends classes?

I left my husband for another woman 5 years ago. I feel like I made a mistake, especially because of the effect on my kids. My kids are in college and older, but it still rips the family apart. Life with a woman is not as I thought, and I think I was going through a mid-life crisis. I don't physically love my x-husband, but there is so much I love about him in other ways. I miss him. I'm afraid of what others will think, like I'm crazy woman for leaving him for a woman, and now going back. Especially after I bashed him so much (he had a temper). But I feel like this new relationship has just as many issues, no relationship is perfect. I sit in guilt everyday for what I've done.So, I might as well go back with him in order to have my family back. It's what others think which is holding me back. Plus I'll have the guilt of leaving my current wife. I'll have to live with that again. I'm confused.

My son is 19 and enrolled in a 2 year college Police Officer program. He just started 3 weeks ago and has barely attended classes. I told him he needs to attend lecture and complete online work. This is after his friends told him attending class isn't necessary because all the work online. I said I wouldn't pay for school if he doesn't attend. He tells me to stay out of his business and that he can't tell me how to live. He says you can't control me and I'm not making deals or conditions with you. After this, he claimed he will go to school several times, but he barely.did. Then I dragged him out of bed and told him, I'm withdrawing you if you don't go to school. He said no, you would never do that to me, even though you say it. I asked if he even really wanted to be a cop and that he has stiff competition. He can't explain why he doesn't want to go to school. He goes out with his friends and doesn't get a job--keeps saying he will. He is not doing drugs or drinking.

In the past, when he was in high school, it was the same pattern. He would tell me he didn't feel good to get out of school, his attendance was horrible. He barely got by and even took an extra year of high school (canada) and he never finished it. I used to put up with it because I had gone through a divorce so I knew he was going through things.

Should I allow him the semester to skate through classes his way, or do I withdraw? I''m afraid he won't get into college again and that he'll end up a loser.

I left my husband for another woman, but this relationship isn't what I thought. I feel guilty for ruining my kids lives because they are so bitter with me. I'm not attracted physically to my ex-husband but I absolutely miss him. I never thought I would because he used to annoy me so much. I'm depressed at what I've done and I feel like I want to end this current relationship and go back but I'm afraid of what others will think. And physcially, I am just not attracted to my ex.

Facts: Male, attending Business School. 29 ACT. Parents have $45,000 saved toward college. Each parent pays one year (parents are divorced). Student pays one year (loans and work). Please help weigh options:

Indiana Univ: Out-of-state. $40,000 per year. Most prestigious, top tier business school. Accepted into "pre-business school". Must earn at least all B's in EVERY class (NO B-) the first two semesters in order to get into Kelley Business School---quite nervous about earning all B's, but don't want to place limits either.

Univ of Iowa: Out-of state. $35,000 per year. Good choice, but less prestigious. Accepted into "pre-business school". Must earn a 2.75 GPA on FOUR business classes spread over the first two years of college in order to get into Tippie College of Business.

Illinois State: In state, cheapest tuition $25,000 per year. "Second tier" school with a pretty good reputation. Was directly admitted into their business school.

Facts: Male, attending Business School. 29 ACT. Parents have $45,000 saved toward college. Each parent pays one year (parents are divorced). Student pays one year (loans and work). Please help weigh options:

Indiana Univ: Out-of-state. $40,000 per year. Most prestigious, top tier business school. Accepted into "pre-business school". Must earn at least all B's in EVERY class (NO B-) the first two semesters in order to get into Kelley Business School.

Univ of Iowa: Out-of state. $35,000 per year. Good choice, but less prestigious. Accepted into "pre-business school". Must earn a 2.75 GPA on FOUR business classes spread over the first two years of college in order to get into Tippie College of Business.

Illinois State: In state, cheapest tuition $25,000 per year. "Second tier" school with a pretty good reputation. Was directly admitted into their business school.

I went on two job interviews for an administrative assistant position. The last interview was Friday and I was told I would hear back this week. I sent a thank you email on Friday evening. I haven't heard anything back and it's been a week. Should I send an email inquiring if the position is still open? Or should I phrase it more positive? Please help with a nice way to send the email.

My son wants to go to an out of state college next year, which has a "sticker price" of $45,000 per year (Indiana University) I'm divorced and on a teacher's salary. My ex and I have built up college savings of $40,000, so that will cover one year of college. As far as the rest, my ex proposed that our son pays for one year of college, I pay for another year and my ex pays the other. I don't have a lot saved at all: about $10,000. So, that would mean big college loans for me. I'm sure my ex can afford more, he makes over $200,000. Do I have an argument if I propose my ex pay more toward college since he makes more? Going to an in state college could be the route my son will need to go; but before so, I want to look at my options.

I've been married (same sex) for 2.5 years. She moved from Canada and doesn't know anyone here. So, the few times I've been out with my girlfriends (old neighbors I've known for 15 years and other friends who I've known from college), I brought my spouse with me. She didn't know my friends, so it was a good way to introduce her to my friends. But, I sort of miss just going out with my girlfriends on my own. If I were married to a man, I wouldn't be bringing him along. So, I'm struggling with this. At times, I don't mind bringing my spouse, but other times, I just want some alone time with my friends--similar to women wanting "girl time" away from their spouses. The thought of leaving my spouse alone at home makes me sad because she doesn't have friends of her own. But at the same time, I want to be able to meet up with my friends to catch up, without having to bring my spouse along. Sometimes when I bring her, she becomes a bit shy because she doesn't have the history of all the memories everyone else has and I don't want my friends to think we are a package deal, either. How do I tell my spouse without hurting her feelings??

I am a teacher, and I get 2.5 months off of school for the summer. During the rest of the year, I work 7:30-3:00 (usually leave school at 3:30 to 4:00, arriving home by 4:15-4:30). My spouse works 9:00-5:00 year round (no summers off). I leave at 7:00 am each morning while my spouse takes the dog out and leaves at 8:30 and arrives home by 5:30. When I get home each day, I take the dog out, unload the dishes, load the dishes, make the dinner, and often stop at the grocery store on the way home. On weekends, I do most of the laundry. I vacuum and clean bathrooms thoroughly every few weeks or once a month. I also pay the bills. My spouse will sweep the floor and sometimes do things like clean the counters or pick up things around the house, and will do bigger grocery runs on the weekends. During summers I do the same things plus more projects and organizational tasks. Does this seem split up evenly?

I was accepted into University of Iowa's "pre-business" program and I am applying for a petition for reconsideration into the Direct Admission program. I would appreciate any advice as to how I should tackle this question.