?

I'll try to make this brief.

My mom passed away a year ago. My younger brother, while an adult, is chronically ill and can't work.

Our dad just doesn't do much and has battled depression for many years as well. He and my brother don't always see eye to eye and Dad can't/doesn't know how to help my brother. Both of them tell me how much they appreciate all I do for them. Like Netflix bingeing with my bro, cleaning, buying groceries and lunches, taking my bro to his doctor appointments, taking care if the pets etc.

Meanwhile, I feel like I can't move forward iny own life. I feel trapped! I love them and I wanna help but I don't know what to do about my own life. I wanna work or go to college or something. Maybe move out.

With this and other added stress in life, I'm also finding it hard to stay away from old coping mechanisms/adictions. I feel very unproductive and completely trapped in this life. Any ideas? Help me.

So, I'm a confident, fairly nice girl, and yes, I am adorable.

But why can't I find one guy alive with the same qualities? Looks are not the most important thing in the world, but It's like this; all the really attractive, to me, guys tend to be shallow. All the sweet, nice, guys are super needy and not at all confident, or all that attractive, (lack of confidence doesn't help attractiveness) I'm just looking for a charismatic, but romantic, sweet, but not codependant, attractive at least to me, kind of guy.

I'm actually fairly comfortable on my own/being independent but I'm also secretly a romantic and eventually would like to find the right guy.

But all the ones around me, it seems, are either desperate and needy or cold and shallow. No one's perfect but...

Is there any hope of finding that ideal balance in a guy?

So, I'm a confident, fairly nice girl, and yes, I am adorable.

But why can't I find one guy alive with the same qualities? Looks are not the most important thing in the world, but It's like this; all the really attractive, to me, guys tend to be shallow. All the sweet, nice, guys are super needy and not at all confident, or all that attractive, (lack of confidence doesn't help attractiveness) I'm just looking for a charismatic, but romantic, sweet, but not codependant, attractive at least to me, kind of guy.

I'm actually fairly comfortable on my own/being independent but I'm also secretly a romantic and eventually would like to find the right guy.

But all the ones around me, it seems, are either desperate and needy or cold and shallow. No one's perfect but...

Is there any hope of finding that ideal balance in a guy?

So, here's the story;

A friend of mine, not that close but still a friend, was dating this guy. I was so happy for her as she seemed content and full of joy. One day she brought him with her and introduced me. She knew of a job opening where he worked and they told me to look into it. This guy was cute but I didn't think my type. And I thought I noticed a certain look in his eyes when he looked at me but I didn't think much of it.

Often I would ask my friend, how it's going with him and that they were cute together etc. And I was really, genuinely happy for her.

As for me I was not even remotely looking for romance at that time. In fact I just wasn't interested in dating at all.

A few weeks later, I'm at a dance and that guy is there. We dance, as friends and he is very sweet and easy to get along with. Later that night, he finds and chats me up. I get that feeling again that he kinda likes me and I try to keep it friendly. By the end of the night he asks if I'm still looking for a job and that we could network through Facebook.

So, I think he'd make a good friend and how cool would it be if he could me a job!?

The next day or so, we're Facebook friends now and he is messaging me. Never about work but he's seeming flirty. When I'm sure he's not just being "friendly" anymore,and asks me on a date, I withdraw a bit and he asks if he's made me uncomfortable. I tell him, "I just thought you and my friend were together...?" He tells me, "No, it ended" I make it known I enjoy chatting with him but wouldn't feel comfortable going on a date just yet. So he says, how about just getting to know each-other then?" Seems harmless enough and, not wanting to disappoint him, I agree.

By the end of the night we have chatted 'till 4:00am

A few more nights this continues and each time he breaks me down a little more until finally I agree to a date.

Now, I really like this guy and my friend's heart is broken, though she is trying to be okay with it I sense the animosity. When I saw her today, I nearly cried for causing her pain.

I don't know if our friendship can be mended and this guy and I may have something special.

We text and Skype every night until he passes out. And both of us, I think, are falling for each other, he more quickly than I.

From seeing Facebook posts it seems that they were close and now she considers him her best friend, I think it's only me she hates.

And he assures me that it was not working out but she always called him her prince and he called her his princess. Each time I see that I wonder, if I'm the real reason he broke up with her, though he tells me that It's something else. And what if they were meant to be, not us? What if they both deserve better and I'm just an obstacle?

I wasn't even looking for love in any way and now I just feel screwed no matter what.

-please, be honest but don't be too cruel.

So, I love rock and roll music but I really need to listen to some newer stuff and broaden my playlist. Classic stuff like Styx, Billy Joel, Eroupe, and Queen are all examples of stuff I listen to.

I really love and want to find more upbeat rock though. But all I can ever find is stuff that is either screamo or way too nasty with too much swearing, and overly sexual lyrics.

Stuff I do like are; europe, like 2 of the cleaner songs by rise against, Coldplay, some Alien Ant Farm, etc.

I'm also open to some other types of music just as long as it's pretty clean.

Please, suggest some good group and songs I could listen to. Thanks :)

I wanted to ask, why are people so stupid, but that seemed too mean.

My family membes, though I love them dearly, are especially obtuse at times.

I am an orginized person and I try to think logically most of the time. I understand logically that by having a clean space it is more comfortable and useable, so I keep my space clean. Sure, like everyone, I'll a have a few lazy days where I throw my laundry on the floor and just don't feel like cleaning up but in the end I never let it get too out of control. The entire rest of my family on the other hand, are the messiest people that I've ever known. piles of things from before I was born are never gone through and never thrown out though my parents keep saying they mean to get to it. My teenage little brother lives in the tv room claiming he is uncomfortable for some unknown reason sleeping in his room. I tell him if he cleaned it up it would become his favorite room in the house. He says the mess is not the cause and even that he prefers it that way. But really, his room reaks and you can't even open the door all the way because of all the clutter and his bed is also covered in stuff. My parrents are admitted pacrats mostly out of lack of motivation to clean it up and sentimental attachments. To my brother, on the other hand, EVERYTHING is sentimental, even trash and empty boxes he thinks could be useful so he adds to the pile. I really worry that out of everyone, my brother is the most likely to become a full blown hoarder, out of extreme laziness and unwillingness to do any form of work if it isn't Xbox related.

I'm not germophobic, but being in my situation is like being excruciatingly germophobic while living in the city dump. My room is the only nice place in the house, my parrents constantly complain about the home not being what they want it to be but do absolutely nothing about it. The mess and excess crap is what keeps, and has kept as long as I can remember, our house from being a home.

What do I do to keep sane until the beautiful day I can afford my own home?

Some background, my older brother did actually behave inappropriately towards me from about age 12 to 15. And when I was 7 an older boy (not related to me) took advantage of me. And I have an uncle who made inappropriate comments.

My problem, I am now verry uncomfortable being hugged, touched, or even too close to male family members. I am always wondering what is really in their minds when one hugs me or makes a joke or compliments me.

I most often am uncomfortable around my father. He has never done anything pervy to my knowledge but the things he does such as joking about it when a commercial for Victoria secret comes on, hugging me normally, poking or teasing me, opening my bedroom door slightly to talk to me or let my dog back in, even though he doesn't look it still feels like an invation of privacy, and worst today, he came up close behind me and poked me in the sides. It all seems innocent enough right? But I get freaked out anyway. He is a good person who would be disgusted to see a story on news about someone molesting etc. someone else, and yet I feel uncomfortable. Could my mind just be over reacting to men because of my past. I have little problem getting close to female family members, just the male ones I always feel worried about.

I'm the kind of person that people would call a loner.

Something people may not understand is that it's solitude I value, not loneliness.

I love my friends and family and need my social interactions, just not as much as others do.

My teenage younger brother won't go to school half out of medical reasons.

And as much as I love him, the boy is clingy. And oh so needy. The opposite of my personality and I never, Never have a single day to myself and for any spare second I have I am cleaning up after him and the rest of my family.

I wish there was a place I could escape to other than trapping myself in my room.

Anyone have any good ideas on how I can escape?

Long story short, I've been feeling increasingly more helpless and yes even feel like I'm going crazy for a number of reasons. But no, I do not wish to harm myself or others just yet.

My problem is, even if I did have the courage to admit to a professional that I need help I don't think I could tell my family because I'm supposed to be strong, and normal and I'm embarrassed to admit otherwise.

Even if I found a way around all that though, how would I pay?

My parrents have to borrow money from me on almost a weekly basis now and I don't have my own insurrence nor a way to pay for it.

Does anyone know of a free online support group or if there are any mental health facilitates that are free?

Thanks in advance!

I just got hired for my very first job ever. I will be working soft lines when the store is up and running.

Right now we are helping set up the Target store. Today was my second day. Yesterday was hard but survivable, today, 8 hours on my feet moving and placing shelves, it was horrible.

I'm glad and excited to be working at Target, however, I'm not sure I can handle too many more days like today.

So my question is, anyone who has ever hellped to open a new Target store, about how many days does it usually take for the craziness of setting up the store to end and training for the main job to begin?

Also any helpful advice would be appreciated.

Thanks in Advanced :)

What would you think if you saw one person out taking a walk with just themselves?

I'm asking because while I love the outdoors and would like to just go lay out on a blanket in the middle of a grassy field nearby, I am a bit self conscious of what passersbys would think of me, an 18 year old girl, sitting or laying alone in the middle of a field watching the clouds?

The "field" I'm talking about is actually just a big grassy area around a nearby neighborhood and visible from the street.

I worry that, especially because I like to bring my bag or a backpack with a blanket and stuff to draw or write with, people will think I'm a runaway or something.

It makes me uncomfortable and self-conscious because the one time I finally did go out and do this people stared and cars slowed down etc.

So tell me, is it so weird for someone like me to just go out and enjoy the fresh air once in a while?

Any suggestions or advice?

So here is a small section of the book I have been writing. Let me know what you think and if it seems like a book someone would buy. Thanks :)

When I turned to yell to Kate that I had found the necklace but was stuck and needed help because my ankle felt sprained, I faced a pare of large, glowing green eyes instead. Attached to the eyes was a dog, a huge dog. It had white fur and looked a lot like a husky.

I was frozen and too afraid I might make it worse if I yelled for help to make a sound. I sat there staring the beast in the eyes, its teeth were bared and aiming for my throat. When it lunged I knew my life was about to either end or make me wish it had. I closed my eyes and when I felt the first pain of the monster’s teeth slicing through my skin I found my voice again and let out a blood curdling scream.

The teeth felt like a hundred knives crushing and cutting me. My foot was still caught in the hole and the animal began shaking me. I heard my ankle snap and quickly the pain followed. I couldn’t scream anymore and I was beginning to hallucinate.

I thought I saw a boy running up to the grassy field of the park. his shape blurred and then I started seeing double. There were two dogs coming to kill me now. I started to see spots of nothingness, then pure, dark emptiness. My life had ended.

I signed up for Critique Circle, so I can get some feedback on some stuff I have been writing.

After I signed up it says, ''You will receive an email as soon as your application has been reviewed"

I suppose that this e-mail would complete the process because I don't have a password for it yet.

The site won't let me in and it says that my e-mail and user name are registered.

Sooo... I am wondering if anyone knows how long the process is supposed to take. I have checked my e-mail a few times and still nothing from the site. I even checked my spam box.

Please, if anyone has used this site and knows about how long it can take for them to get back to me or if there was some kind of problem? I would greatly appreciate the input.

Thanks in advance! :)

I have 3 dogs and I want to walk 1 at a time so my arms don't get ripped off and leave the other 2 but the problem is that as soon as I open the door they all run out out the door and into the street and I have to track all 3 down. so how do I calm the other 2 down enough so that they will stay in the house and be okay with me taking the other dog. I know they need some training and I am working on that and hoping that walking with them 1 on 1 I can train them 1 on 1 as well.

I appreciate any help :)

Remember how back in the ancient times, there was no Facebook, no Halo Reach, No cell phone, no cars, no internet, no electronic media, etc.?

Well, if all of that went away or just stopped working today, what would you do?

How would it affect the world we have become accustomed to?

Would you have a plan to fall back on?

How would you survive when it comes to weather challenges like snow or floods?

Would it give you a greater respect for how far the world has come in technology, medicine, everything?

Any other thoughts?

First of all I do not realistically intend to leave until I have my GED and at least have a job that can support one person.

What I am looking for is hope that I could get out of here.

I have been dreaming of being out on my own since I was 12 years old. I really love my family but they have been so negative and it hasn't gotten better. My parents both suffer from depression and likely my brother who lives at home too It took me years to get past mine and I don't want to be dragged down with them.

I find it hard to have patience with them especially my brother and mom. My dad is usually okay but when he does upset me he is by far the worst.

I am 18 years old I do have a plan. GED, Cosmetology school, and maybe a mission for my church for 18 months depending on how things go. And then a job and moving out and maybe some more college.

I just want to know of way that I can leave now if any. I do well alone and my fear is that I will never get out or have the opportunity to be on my own. my parents (whom I love dearly ) are horrible with money. So I do not have a cent saved for college and I just feel so trapped. So if anyone has advice on ways I can move out ASAP for a little while or just some place to go when I need to get away. I know this question is rather moot but I just want some hope.

P.S. I don't have a car or friends to stay with

I am not worried, just curious. I was playing with my dog, a boxer/lab mix, and I threw a tennis ball for her at close range and when she tried to catch it she bounced it back and it hit me right in the forehead. I don't think it hit hard enough to cause any real damage, it may or may not bruise

I was already tired before but afterward I felt and feel more tired, everything is funny and I am only a tiny bit dizzy. So my question is, could that be enough to cause a minor concussion?

First, I have to say that I love all of my family dearly.

Second, My little 14 year old brother is a PIG!

We have 3 dogs and 2 cats at home and so naturally the house is gonna get a little messy from time to time however i'd have to say that all the animals account for only about 10-15 % of the mess while my brother is the king of filthiness and accounts for the rest. He is becoming more and more strong headed every day and will NOT listen to anything anyone asks him to do including reaching the 5 inches to the trash can to throw something away. He eats in the living room, which would be okay if he would putt his dishes in the kitchen and throw away his trash but instead he leaves all of it on the coffee table! I try to set a good example and am always cleaning up after myself. He will not do any of his chores (he has like one main chore) and he scarcely showers or bathes. My parents both work full time and can't do much about it and when it comes to my brother and my mom he practically forces her to bend to his will by constantly begging for what he wants or throwing a tantrum when she says "No" a word that is only in his vocabulary when he speaks it.

PLEASE I am desperate. Being nice doesn't work, being patient makes him think he can get away with it, and flat out asking him to do ANYTHING results in his rebellious "you can't tell me what to do" act. He is kind of becoming a jerk too. Which is sad because I know that's not the kind of person he really is. I've been hoping it's just a phase and I am pretty sure becoming a teenager is not helping but it feels like this has been going on for several years and recently has just gotten ridiculous. I am home all day and take care of the pets and the house and it drives me crazy when he ruins all my hard work. I cleaned the entire house from top to bottom yesterday and made it livable again and he still leaves his trash and dishes and video games and movies out of their cases and all around the house.

Pretty please anyone with any advice, please help!

I am thinking about going away for about 18 months after I do 2 years of college here. My dog will be about 3 or 4 years old when I go and he is no doubt MY dog.

He sleeps in my room at the foot of my bed and he is my best friend too.

He is very smart and can pick up on when it is bed time or time to go outside etc.

I went camping for a week once when he was about 1/2 a year old and he did seem to remember me when I got back.

If I do go away he will have to stay with my family and I won't get to see him again for 18 months.

Luckily he loves and gets along with my parents, especially my dad who is his 2nd favorite person alive.

I just wonder if he will remember me or at least warm back up to me quickly when I get back.

I know it is silly to worry about something when it probably won't happen for another 2 years or so but it worries me anyway.

- Any personal experiences would be very helpful.

Thank you :)

Here's my situation. I love my family very much but I am about ready to get out on my own. I am 18 and know a nice, not too expensive place I could live really close to the community college. My problem is that I don't yet have a job. I would love to work at a Petsmart, and there is also one close to the location I would move to, and I have applied to one location about a month ago and never heard back. I am thinking of re-applying to both locations. I have no references and no prior job experience but do feel I am very qualified to work there because I have several pets, helped to take care of a relatives petting zoo and area, among other things. I did list these qualifications in my resume that I sent with the application.

Anyway, I am in a difficult part of my life because I am trying to grow as a person and trying to accomplish many goals, including getting my GED and deciding what I want to do with my life, weather I want to go the beauty school or move out and I am already planning on doing more college down the road once I have decided what I want to go for. I am also trying to get healthier and all of these thing are difficult to do from home because I feel like my family holds me back a lot, they don't try to I just do so much better on my own. I know this because I did live with a cousin for a few months away from my family and I had fun, lost A lot of weight, and did very well. I feel like I am having a difficult time getting my life started partly because I am still living with my parents and 14 year old little brother.

Any tips, advice, ideas on how I can get started, things I can do in the mean time, how I can get the job I want or just a job, and ways to survive until I can get started and out on my own would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance!