Capt Crasher

I know, specifics have to be based on income, property, credit history, blah blah blah...

While articles & ads say "You could get 2.5%", I figure reality is actually somewhat higher. But without 12 pages of paperwork nobody wants to give a legitimate range.

What would be considered "good"?

What would be "outrageously high"?

In Hells Kitchen this week the winners met the Executive Chef of the resturant they will be Head Chef at. So what is the difference between them? Does the Executive Chef report to them? Does He oversee them? Are they equals just doing different jobs with similar titles?

I mean, even if Your paranoid they COULD BE out to get You, right? SO if it turns out they ARE out to get You, are You still paranoid?

Which movie was that in, and do You think They should do a remake of it?

And what cast do You think would be good if they remade it?

But not too pricey, eh.

Even if I don't know it's raining (or getting ready too) I'll have trouble staying awake, almost to the point of passing out.

Why is that?

I have a Belkin Wireless Router (G) connected to a Comcast Cable Internet connection, and a SEPERATE standard (as in NOT CORDLESS) phone line through MCI.

I understand that connecting a wireless router to a line shared by the phone, or using the same frequency as a cordless phone, can cause static. BUT can a wireless router cause static on a seperated non-cordless phone line?

And if You say "Yes", please explain how...

And want to replace the breakers/breaker-box can I use the "off the shelf" kits or do I have to get special ones?

Is there any way to fix it with just a left handed spanner, a sonic screw-driver, and a roll of duct-tape?

From work in the middle of the day for a quick shot of whatever? What was it? And how did the rest of your day go?

Today @ lunch - Johnnie Walker Black Label. Most productive afternoon I've had in a while. ;-)

Or is it a waste of time for Me to go see it?

Anybody see it yet? Worth it?

You probably heard this one before, but I still think it's good...

Boudreaux went fishing one afternoon, and on the way back with his catch ran into the Game Warden.

"Boudreaux, I can tell before I even count'em Your WAYYYY over the limit. Once I know just how many You got I'm gonna write you a ticket."

"But Warden, I wasn't fishin' !" claims Boudreaux.

"Then what are all those fish?" the Warden asks.

"Them are trained fish, I took them for a workout in the lake. They do backflips and stuff & come right back to My bucket."

The Warden says "Yeah, right. This I gotta see. Lets go down to the lake."

At the lake Boudreaux dumps all of his fish in and then looks blankly at the Warden.

"Well, Boudreaux, Let see these trained fish of Yours do thier stunts." the Warden demands.

"What fish?"

besides Java, Joe, Bean juice, Morning Mojo, Go juice?

I figured it out. Let see if You did.

If You did then you also know...

Why did it take off the statue of Liberty's head?

It's a new one to Me. Heard it on the radio the other day...

A Blonde is speeding down the road and gets pulled over.

She see's the officer is both Blonde and a Woman, and figures she can talk Her way out of it.

"Hello Fellow Blonde!" She says with a big friendly smile.

"Don't give Me that!" snaps the officer. "I've had too many blondes try to talk their way out of tickets today. Let Me see your license!"

The Blonde driver starts looking through Her purse, the glove box, even reaching under the seat, but can't find it.

"I can't find it, officer, but I know I have one. Can You remind Me what it looks like?"

The officer rolls Her eyes and says "It's a rectangle with your picture on it."

Looking into Her purse the Blonde driver see's her reflection in a small mirror, and grabs it. "Here it is officer!" She says as She hands it over.

Glancing down the Blonde officer says: "I didn't realize YOU were a Police Officer too! Here's Your license back. Have a nice day.

The SpaceQuest series, Wasteland, and one other series I can't remeber the name of...

My wife made him a tiny little sweat-shirt to wear. Apparently He didn't like it.

He managed to get it off AND hide it somewhere (we still havn't found it).

Does this indicate He's smart, or just a smart alec dog?

A blind man walks into a busy bar and orders a drink.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is only fair -- given that you are blind -- that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

2. The bouncer is a blonde lady boxer.

3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. Blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

4. The lady sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.

5. The woman to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler."

"Now, think about it seriously. Do you REALLY wanna tell that joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, sighs, and mutters, "Not if I'm gonna have to EXPLAIN IT five times...!"