Gentle falls the tears of the cloud
upon the rippled waters of my soul
Whispers dance upon the breeze
in a forest where the ancient's weep
Rustling leaves under tender foot
shatters the silence of old
to where the warrior sits alone
and ponders the sounds of war
Waterworks.
Favorite Answer
Hmm
I'm going to be honest.
I like the word choice, but you could expand on the use of vocabulary. Like, instead of "Gently" you could use, "gingerly"
Now, for your full stanzas, you need some punctuation. Commas and periods will help with the flow of the poem, guide the reader, let the reader take breathes, etc.
Here's how I would do your first stanza:
(btw, gingerly means gently/ softly)
Gingerly falls the tears of the cloud
Upon the rippled waters of my soul.
Whispers dance upon the breeze,
In a forest where the ancients weep.
And if you didn't see what i did, you should always try to capitalize the beginning of each line.
good luck and keep writing!
likeminded
stinjey a preview , post the rest too
Me Myself & I
I like it very creative.
Anonymous
very descriptive :)