Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

Scared to get pregnant?

I didn't think I would ever want a baby when I was younger. I am almost 30 now and my boyfriend really wants a baby. He loves kids and will make a wonderful dad. I would like to have a baby but am scared of pain at childbirth, and that something will happen to my kid or that I will not be good enough as a mother. I know it is all worth it in the end. Given a choice I think I would rather have one than not. Is there anything that you can tell me that will help me out a little? Please do not condemn me for feeling this way.

Update:

We are planning on getting married. We will be fine financially. I guess I am not sure if I am able to make such a long committment to the new person I will bring to the world.

Update 2:

We both work full time. His parents are elderly and mine are across the ocean. It would be just the two of us dealing with everything.

12 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I will be honest, it is scary! I was 27 when i had my son. I swore no epidural.. yeah that lasted 24 hours. Labor was long and hard. After the epidural it was very easy. I was up on my feet within a few hours and had my baby out and about within a week. It was so worth it! I love my son, he's now 3!

    Would I be willing to do it again, YES... in about 8 months. Am I scared about how to handle 2... more than anything, but I know I'll learn along the way. I'm also very scared of not being able to carry this baby, I'm just praying nothing happens

    One of the best things is a good support system. Here are some questions to ask. Do you have a supportive husband/boyfriend? Are your parents or siblings around? Do you have friends who will understand?

    Also, are you financially able to care for this baby? This is very important. Kids are more expensive than you think

  • 1 decade ago

    You need to decide if you really want to have a child or not because it is a serious commitment and responsibility. You should not have a child just because your boyfriend wants you to.

    First of all, I am assuming that you are not married because you said your "boyfriend." Even though your boyfriend may be a great guy, boyfriends tend to be less committed than husbands.

    I believe it is better for a couple to be in a loving committed marriage before bringing children into the world.

    If you do decide that you want a child, then talk to some medical doctors about your concerns about the pain of child birth. They should be able to help you understand the process and what to expect.

    As far as your concerns about something happening to your child or whether you will be a good mother or not, there are no guarantees, but loving your child is the first step. You will figure the rest out as you go along.

    If you really want a child, talk to some doctors, read about child birth and pre-natal care, and learn all you can. You might even want to read about parenting.

    I'm sure most first time mothers have the same concerns you do so don't feel like you are the only one to have these feelings.

  • penna
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    The handiest method you'll be able to understand for certain if you happen to've had a miscarriage is to move see a health care provider. Most individuals do not begin seeing their belly get better till approximately four months alongside. But, the truth that you are bleeding is not well. If for a few motive you can not see a health care provider, a minimum of take a being pregnant experiment. I did see on Discovery Health channel a woman that used to be bleeding after she suggestion she had a miscarriage and it became out to be an ectopic being pregnant which may also be deadly so that you MUST touch a health care provider instantly. I do not imply to scare you however it is greater to be reliable than sorry.

  • 1 decade ago

    You are lucky that your bf wants a baby now. My husband and i have been together for 5 yrs (married for 2) and he still wants to wait. There are many different options with childbirth that will make it safe for you and baby. If anything does happen like a deformity or a learning disability you wouldn't love them any less would you?? You will be a great mother as long as you just love, care and teach them.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    Getting pregnant is somewhat scary. Your body goes through a lot of changes. And it's not easy either. Babies aren't easy, period. You lose a lot of sleep, and basically any free time is gone. You never get alone time with your boyfriend, and relationships can suffer. Still, it's worth it. They have drugs to help you with the pain of childbirth. I was scared, I wont lie it hurts... but you get through it. I forget all the pain now!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    They have medications that help with the pain of childbirth. It isn't like the 1800's any more where woman have all that pain.

    I can't help you with your other fears though. If you have a baby just be the best mom you can be and you'll do fine!

  • JLee
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Your fears are not silly!!! I myself was scared to death of the pain, but let me tell you those epidurals are wonderful!!! If they work right you dont feel any pain. And regarding your other fears they are perfectly natural. Once you see that perfect little person there is nothing better or no one else as special to you as him or her. All those fears dont necessarily go away, but they are very dulled. You will always worry if you are doing a good enough job, but then again I think we all do. Trust me IT IS TOTALLY ALL WORTH IT.

    Source(s): Myself, I have had 2 boys naturally and am pregnant with my third!!!!
  • 1 decade ago

    Condemn you - I priase you !! you are thinking this through and not rushing into it.

    I have 2 children and you will always worry if something happens to them, its a mothering instinct, if you wonder if you will be a good mum probably means you will be.

    It is a massive decision for you both, make sure you are truly comfortable yourself. (if you choose to, I wouldn't read too many books it impeeds your intuition).

  • 1 decade ago

    Princess P this is your personal choice. I'd wait till you're confident and emotionally ready. It's not too late at your age. My aunt had a baby at 40, so it's not too late for you. Good luck!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    remember...you are fullfilling the human DNA's quest for expansion...go for it, you'll make an excellent mum, if your scared of pain, get a caeserian, it wont hurt as much...good luck!

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.