Spiritually speaking, how do you handle "gossip-prone" family members?

I listen and forget, but once it goes to far I yell "hey knock it off!!"

Family or not, people gossip about the problems of others in an attempt to make themselves feel better about their own shortcomings and insecurities. What they're really saying between the lines when they gossip is "So and so's divorce is terrible, isn't it? Good thing we don't have problems that bad. I guess that makes us better people, doesn't it?"

People who gossip like this will not stop. Their pathetic need to constantly validate that their own lives are not so bad, will always over-rule any class and common decency.

Suffice to say, once you have identified a gossiper, never share anything personal with them ever again.

I had 2 like that. One was older, so I wasn't comfortable sitting her down and saying "Look, knock off the gossip." Respect your elders, and all that stuff. So I eventually made sure that if I had something that needed to be quiet, I didn't tell Aunt Jeanne.

Another was just a few yrs older than me. So I got with her and asked her please to keep the gossip to at least a minimum about the family. I don't know if that really helped. People who are into gossip don't seem to have the basic self control to keep their tongues from wagging, so eventually everybody stopped telling her stuff.

Could you just call the family member or members that you want to tell something instead of telling them at a get together? That way you control who you tell and there isn't a chance for someone to over hear. If that won't work, just pull anyone you want to talk to off to one side and make sure no one with big ears is around you.

The simple answer is just to refrain from passing on information of a personal nature about yourself to others. I know where you're coming from. I have a sister that is that way. She tells me so much really personal info about others in the family that she really shouldn't. And I know that if she will tell me personal things about the others, then she will also think nothing about passing on personal info that I have told her.

If someone tells me that type of info they don't have to it's really not necessary in most cases, to ask me not to pass it on. I know when something is of a personal nature and would not pass it on anyway.

Never reveal anything about yourself that you don't want blabbed to the rest of the earth.

Do not join in any kind of gossip. If someone starts gossiping, say, I'm sorry but I don't want to join into this. If they don't stop, move away.

If someone has blabbed something you asked them not to, tell them that you are disappointed that they did that, and do not entrust them with personal information again.

Don't do any of this in anger....but do say it. People need to understand what is right and what is not right.

I have one in law that is bad for gossip. He will take a simple story and twist it right out of shape. So usually when he starts, I yawn a lot so he will get the hint that he is boring me right to death. If that doesn't work, I pick up my headphones, put them over my ears, and blot him out with some good music. That pisses him off . he he .

I always love the people around me but not their gossip.

Once, I met an aunt in public and the first thing she said was if there were any problem that I encounter, I can always trust her for help.

I said there’s no problem.

She continue:” if there’s no problem, why did you divorce your wife?”

I said:” it’s not your problem.”

I seldom give people the chance to gossip around me and for those who know me always got their gossip volley back to themselves.

Well, I quite gossip-Proof.

I would let them talk and just say "uh huh" and "ok". They have finally stopped gossiping to me about things. They know that I don't really care, and that I'm not taking anyone's side.

We used to beat each other up all the time.

Snowbanks are pretty convenient for tossing stupid relatives into

And I guess that...er ..uh

I forgot what my third point was.

I guess I'm still in need of coffee.

I don't have this problem because I never share such juicy gossips.

A lot of families do this btw. The best thing you can do is not engage in it period.