what shud a woman do?

Spelling is your friend.

nuts, let me put it this way:

spelig iz yur frend

Does the woman have a job? Well, if she has, there wouldn't be any problem. She could stand on her own legs and let the husband go astray and she could give a good future for her kids too.

I don't think we have a career woman in the present scenario. All you can do is pester your husband with requests not to leave his job. Ignore your in-laws. The more you listen, the more they irritate. Do your best to make your husband flexible. A wife should be able to alienate the husband from evil in-laws from the very beginning. At least start now.

Good luck!

You husband is mature enough at the age of 48, you may not be able to stop him what he has decided. Let him do whatever he wants to do .Better you have a control over the money what ever you can so that home expenses continue and let your daughter and son find out some job till her marriage .

Your problem is not unique . Myself being in 40s, I can understand you as well as your husband. Others in this forum are suggesting that you talk to him or convince him, somehow I can see you must have tried enough already to talk to him with no results. So I wont suggest that.

All I can suggest, you tell him that you are with him in his plans but he must first set aside certain sum for the marriage of the daughter & for higher education of the son ( atleast 60% of total amount that would be needed for both ), as you think, any business takes its own time to become successful. Tell him , we cant make children wait for the success. No business would succeed right from the word Go. All business ( however sound is business plan ) takes 3-6 yrs to become successful venture. He is going to say , if I put upto 60% aside, he would be left with almost no capital . Then tell him, ok then lets postpone the idea of business for few more years & earn little bit more so that you will have sufficient capital to play with but you are not willing to come on board if does not set aside this sum.

Tell him, You have full confidence in him. You are not worried about your retirement or your old age . But You are not willing to put the future of children at the vagary of business.

Unless he is going into something which is very dicey or risky business venture .. you should support him. If however you think he is getting involved in something risky./ dicey venture , then put your foot down . Tell him straight forward - No. and if your Parent in Law or somebody elder in the family whose words carry weight in the family should be brought into the picture .

I dont think you can make him understand any other way.. But be firm and see that that sum is set aside under your control & supervision for your daughter's wedding/son's education.

I guess it is your own personal situation though it is written in third person. Anyway, I agree with you that husband should not venture risks at this age of his. He has the responsibility to maintain his family and take care of its members. Taking risk of leaving the present job and doing a business now will put all of you in jeopardy. Sucess in business is as uncertain as in jobs in these days of recession. I have no idea why he wants to quit his job and do business now all of a sudden. I hope he has no problems in the present job. Over and above, you say you do not have sufficient capital to invest in a business nor support from anybody, I guess.

Looking to your scenario, I would suggest you to discreetly find out why he wants to quit the job. Also, since he does not understand his responsibility towards his family and the grown up daughter and does not listen to your pleadings, you please take help of an elderly person, preferably from your husband's relative who can impress upon him and advise him not to undertake such risky venture of doing business at this age and repent later. This is what I can think of now. Hope I helped you a bit.

Nobody can control anyone in life, maybe in your culture this is not so, because when people marry in India, they become the property of their spouses and are a lot of times, controlled by them...

The fact it, one is free to "experiment" at whatever age, as long as you have some plan and some idea what you're doing. So what if his daughter is ready for marriage and his son ready for higher studies? He too, as a life and he too should have the freedom (like we all should in life) to experiment and try out new things....

try to be supportive, i know thats really hard but if he has a great plan that will generate money and a better future if he invest hear him out. you never know until you try. but also give him a time limit too. If its not working wit no profit within a yr than he has to work and support and do that somehow on the side.

It sounds as if your first language is not english/american. But no matter what language you speak sitting down and having a serious discussion with your husband letting him know your feelings as well as listening to his is the only way to solve a problem in the marriage.

You can express your concerns to your husband, because they are very valid. But in the end, it's his life and it's his decision. All you can do is decide whether or not you're going to support him in his choices or leave the marriage.

i hope u dun feel offended by people who mock ur spelling.

But yeah,a nice way to put it is to maybe correct the grammar.ask ur daughter maybe or a close friend to revise the grammar so that we know wats ur question is really all about!

I f you are the wife, just so you know he is getting ready to leave you now that the kids are grown up!!!