I am going to be a dad?

Question

I am 19 and going to be 20 in March. I make about 15,600 a year and my Girlfriend makes the same so do you think we would be alright in supporting a child for a while? I currently have a car loan and still have about $10,000 and I know i have to sell the car so how would that affect my Credit score. I was thinking of going into the army as well because then that would be enough money to support her and my child if we lived on base. And any advice to tell my parents? They have always said be careful and do not have sex before marriage because they are Christian and I think they would be very mad at first but eventually would come around but I have to get over the Shame of telling them and I'm not going to get an Abortion because I just dont believe in it.

wolfman · Accepted Answer

You made a mistake accept it but don't compound it by getting married at 19. You can still have the baby, contribute to its support and continue your relationship with your girlfriend without getting married. If at all possible let your girlfriend continue to live with her parents (if this is an option) and try to get into some kind of trade school. Going into the Army because your GF is pregnant is not a good idea. Right now both of you need the support of your families and friends and you need to educate yourself so you will have a marketable trade so you can support your family. Don't panic and make a bad situation worse. You have a problem but its not an insurmountable problem. I admire you and your girlfriend for not getting an abortion.

Justme · Answer

Start with the parent you feel most comfortable with. Tell them you know you should have taken their advice but you did something stupid. I'm sure they will come around. Its not like they have a choice. Just so long as you get enough money to pay the car loan off your credit score will not be effected. Discuss the options you are considering with your parents if possible, they would know the best way for you to go job wise for your area and your circumstances. Good luck with the baby, its a huge change in your life. Its nice to see someone so young taking responsibility, I'm sure you will make a great dad. Don't forget to save like crazy until your girlfriend can no longer work :)

Cosmos Jones · Answer

Parents forget that you can be careful and still become pregnant but you two can be a reminder.
You have gotten some good advice and you seem to have a level head . Find an adult to talk to who will be supportive and helpful. Your folks might be able to help you with babysitting and even finances if you stay in the area. My mom was super grandmother. You never know what will happen. It is a lot of work but I envy my friends who had their kids early! You are still young enough to grow with your kids , to play with them and ride rides with them at amusement parks. I was an older parent and never knew how much fun it was to have a kid . I wish I had started earlier and had more. I am praying things go well for you all and your folks are supportive. Your folks made their mistakes when they were young and they will understand eventually if not at first.

BouncingBetty · Answer

Have you been in the army before? i can tell you the base is not a place i would want to raise my kid or live at with my girlfriend the only way the army financially benefits soldiers is the fact that you dont spend any money while you are in training or in base, this works well for single soldiers but the ones who are attached its a problem, i too want to go back to the military in hopes of becoming a private military contractor, the money is 600% better in the normal army u would earn less than 40k per year, as a private military you will earn 150-$250,000 a year, most people become private contractors to support their family, although the risk of death is high, the money is well worth it

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I am going to be a dad?

4 Answers