My boyfriend never wants to get married?

A) PLEASE tell me that you don't live with him.

B) To his argument about it just being a piece of paper, he's wrong. If it really WAS just a piece of paper, then it wouldn't matter ... but the simple truth is that it's not just a piece of paper, and it DOES matter.

C) Marriage isn't about how you feel. It's about how you behave, and whether you respect your relationship enough, and each other enough, to do the right thing and make it legal.

D) You're right that you're still very young, but you're not getting any younger, and I think it's time to put it all on the line. "John, I need clarity on something, sweetheart. I'm not going to be one of those foolish women who moves in with her boyfriend thinking that it will make marriage happen eventually, and then 8 years later they're still waiting around for it to happen. If you sincerely don't ever want marriage, tell me now, because I'm ready to think and start planning a future. If you're not there, I need to know so I can decide what to do next."

E) Sex should be OFF THE TABLE (and off everywhere else) until he commits. There's no point in giving a man regular access to your body and risking pregnancy if he's not going to start HONORING YOU, and respecting you. It's not 'no ring, no sex.' It's 'no RESPECT, no sex.'

F) STOP BEING NERVOUS about bringing this up! Are you that desperate to have a boyfriend, that you would let him keep using you, if he knows FULL WELL that he won't ever marry you? Doll, you have to find out now ... and I mean NOW (as in, when you're done reading this, go over to him and have this conversation!) where you stand. What's the point in dragging it out, when he's made himself clear since date #1 (or whenever 'very early on' was.)

G) In the future, when a guy you're seeing says that he never wants to get married, STOP DATING HIM and take him at his word! Why you kept seeing this guy after he told you that early on ... I don't get it. If a guy told me that early on, I would have said 'gee, that's too bad, because that's exactly what I want out of a relationship. I'm looking to get married and have 17 kids, so I guess we're not a match.' SO WHAT that I have feelings for him! Big deal! Feelings have no IQ. The heart cannot think - it can only feel, and it's a horrible barometer for what the right thing to do is.

It's not 'just a piece of paper.' It's a Marriage License, and it tells the world that he's manned-up and ASKED! It tells the world that the two of you are officially hitched, that you've elevated your relationship from boyfriend/girlfriend to Husband and Wife. No matter how long you stay together, you'll never get the protection under the law or the respect that a wife gets. You'll always be just the girlfriend, and he'll just be the lucky guy who gets a warm bod in bed every night AND no responsibility or commitment in the bargain.

Don't be a fool!!

When a guy says 'I don't ever want to get married', LISTEN TO HIM!

This is my view.

P.S. So ... get up and go find him!

First of all, 23 is WAY too young to even be having serious relationships, let alone considering marriage. Second of all, look at marriage from the perspective of the average guy. What marriage really is, from a legal standpoint, is the official creation of a domestic corporation. All of your assets/possessions are merged into a single entity which is then distributed 50/50 in the event of a divorce. And since divorce rates are passing the 50% mark these days, that's a fairly large risk to take. The real kicker is that in marriage, there is absolutely no benefit gained by the partner who brings in the most income (statistically speaking, usually the man). Plus, the man usually gets to throw the woman a 10k+ party to celebrate her (the wedding). Let's face it, weddings are not designed for guys - they're there to fulfill every woman's childhood dream of being a princess for a day. No average guy is going to say "You know what I'd like to do this weekend? Let's go out dancing! I'll bring the cake!". So, to put this another way, consider this scenerio. Would you roll a dice if you knew that you had more than a 50% chance of losing, and losing involved the forfeit of 50% of your possessions? And winning offered no reward whatsoever? I certainly wouldn't. But if you MUST get married, at least do these two things: 1.) Get a prenump - it's worth every penny. 2.) Wait until you're much older than 23. At 23, you're still figuring out who you are and who you want to be. Marriages that begin that young traditionally are the ones that don't survive in the long haul.

The 'Where is this relationship going' talk is overdue. If you know that someday you want to get married and have children and he says he doesn't then ask him what the point is of staying together? The harsh reality is if you stay together because you are in love but you don't want the same thing what IS the point? You will wake up 10 years from now and say hey, I just wasted my 20's an I still have no husband or kids! You resent him for all the time you wasted. It's a hard decision to make but time goes by so fast and you have to ask yourself if you can afford it,

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Marriage isn't just a "piece of paper". That's what people say to justify why they're with people who don't really want to be with them forever.

Marriage is a far more serious commitment than just living together, and it provides many legal benefits and protections for both of you. If you already love and know you want to be with your partner forever, then why NOT get married? It just doesn't make sense. The reason is - he doesn't want to be with you, or at least he's not at all sure yet. And after 2.5 years, you SHOULD know if you are truly in love with that person or not. It doesn't take 10 years to get to know someone.

Look, you say so yourself that you want to get married when you are about 30 years old. You have over seven years until you turn 30. I think you are jumping the gun here. Most couples do not date for 12 and a half years (like you would if you guys made it through the next seven plus years). I think you are adding drama in your life where it does not need to be.

Stop worrying about something so far into your future or you are going to drive yourself nuts. He said, time and time again that he does not want marriage. Then he hinted toward this and that for your future, but not marriage. I think you got your answer but you just do not want ot listen to it.

He is being honest and you should accept that. He's old enough to know what he wants and kids and marriage are not in the cards.

You both aren't teenagers and appear to be quite incompatible. You both have opposite plans for your future. Move on, don't risk a bad marriage and a lot of disappointment.

Close your eyes and picture your life in 20 years. Are you married? or are you with your boyfriend?

You two have different values and goals when it comes to marriage, and you always have. He was honest with you from the beginning and hasn't changed his mind.

The decision is yours, none of us can give you any definites about what to do.

Couples' counseling is my suggestion, or a breakup.

Some men just do not want marriage. You need to sit him down and talk about this with him. If he does not want marriage, ever, to anyone and you do want marriage then your goals are not aligned and one of you (most likely you) will be settling.

My man (26 years old) said at the beginning he doesn't ever want marriage. We've been together over two and a half years now and we talk about marriage sometimes. He still isn't sure if he ever wants marriage because he feels (as yours said) it is just a piece of paper. I'm fine with that. I don't really care either way. Yes, marriage would be nice and a wedding would be fun, but I found the man I love and want to be with, I am content just being with him, I don't need a paper or rings to tell me that he is mine and I am his.

Just sit him down and talk about it. This far into the relationship you should be able to do that.

***Thumbs down for what? For telling the truth? For me not caring if I ever get married? Asinine you people are. Really.