how do i get back to being a strong woman in my realtionship?

Question

weve been together 6 years and i always felt we had the strongest bond. his daughter 15 has been dealing with addictions, shes run from us and disowned us. then 2 years later came back and said she wanted to come home. i said not alone with me. she can be here when her dad is home from work, but not when hes away working. we have 4 other teens between us. everyone has had enough of her. this caused a terrible rift between us. she hates me, has reffered to me as the ***** etc. anyways she will be moveing back in at the end of the month. she tried rehab but quit half way through. he dad has said shes comming home no matter how i feel. we have fought a lot over this and he has left me twice(but then told me the next day he didnt mean it) i have lost all my strength, ive become very weak and needy which is causeing more fights. i thought we could handle anything, but i see were not as strong as i thought we were. how do i get myself back?? ive become such a cry baby

? · Accepted Answer

oh this is so hard. I feel for you I do, but sometimes parents put the blinders on for addicted kids and he is obviously doing this. This is his child and he is going to let her come home. 

If she is going to though I think you should tell him you deserve to lay down some ground rules with this child to protect all of the other kids involved - a curfew, no drugs, she WILL respect you as the Mom in the house, she needs to get treatment, etc.. Try and make it a team effort but make sure you are heard and your desires met.

rmewife · Answer

Start an evacuation plan.  Start putting aside money.  Look at your living options.  Consider your marital assets, locate all important paperwork, make copies, and place them in a safe deposit box.  Get yourself ready and your children ready to leave. If you are not working, get a job, improve your employment abilities, in order to get to a better job, or go to school to help increase your job skills. 

Once you do, you will have the ability to face your husband and lay down what you can and cannot do for his daughter.  He is wrong for putting it on you like that.  Whatever you do, don't make an altimatum that you are not fully prepared to follow through with.  You have children who need you to raise them right and protect them from the termoil that will come with this step-daughter.  

If he wants to put up with her behavior, he has a right to, but your kids must come before him, and his troubles.

Good luck

Winter · Answer

How do I get back to where I was strong when I thought things were better between my wife and I,  (I ask this to myself all the time...)  I feel like I have lost my strength...I looked up something that said if you feel trapped you might be becoming codependent.  Its not really a bad word that indicates you stupidity but rather reactions to something that you cannot control and do not understand how to stop.

Anonymous · Answer

There only way to get your strenth back and that is to get out of the figjht!!! That means 

1. Leave Him
2. except his daughter being there at your home from to time to time.

ETC.

because your husband is going to stick next to his daughter no matter what you do!!!

Anonymous · Answer

Did you tried using Pull Your Ex Back program? Proceed to this site : http://www.ExRecoveryFormula.com/ . It could obviously explain everybody!

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how do i get back to being a strong woman in my realtionship?

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