Bridesmaid - reasonable request or not?

It sounds like she is trying to use you rather than hire a wedding planner (who would normally keep the flow.) You are supposed to assist the bride, not the entire wedding.

The fact that she "fired"some of maids already kind of says to me that she has been unreasonable through this whole thing. Why burn bridges for one day of ceremony? And you are marrying someone you love, so the rest shouldn't even be that big of a deal!

She is being out of line. for her wedding present you should get her a copy of Emily Post's etiquette.

Ugh, no- you most certainly are not being a bad bridesmaid. Quite the opposite in fact, considering you are still going to stand up for her after her ridiculous demands. You are a person, you are supposed to be her friend, and she is treating you like a slave. Seriously, she is being a bridezilla and a horrible friend by putting these expectations on you. It is your duty as a bridesmaid to show up for the wedding on time, in the clothing you were asked to wear. Nothing more than that. Anything extra should be done at your discretion, and honestly she should not be asking anything else of you. She sounds like a demanding, entitled child to be honest. I would let her know that you are not responsible for anything other than showing up, and that you will not be running all her errands the day after her wedding. And after that, I would no longer even be friends with this person, she sounds hideous.

to undertake the role of MC and advise wedding guests of when photos, cake cutting, lantern release will be occuring. -- No, that's what the DJ is suppose to do.

to also stick around the day after the wedding to run errands for her (return suits, drop off cake stands, pick up wedding decorations and clean up venue, etc) -- No, that's what a paid assistant would do.

Just decline. And hold firm.

First off, TWO wedding days? The woman needs a reality check.

This is really excessive. Is she paying you to do all this extra labor? It is clear why the others dropped out. If you are the only one left then the bride has really not been thinking. I recommend doing the minimum and have her make arrangements with someone to run errands.

I would not tolerate any of this nonsense.

Bride is being a demanding Princess...once the wedding day is over so are your Bride's Maid's duties, dear....tell her you are sorry, but she will have to run her own errands after the wedding. if she doesn't like it, you can suggest nicely that she find some other Patsy to replace you...shouldda put your foot down with this Diva Wanna Be long before now....you're stick with the pre-wedding and wedding bull sh!t- do NOT tolerance the after wedding bullsh!t as well.

Bride is being unreasonable. The bride gets you for the wedding day. OK, 2 ceremonies, I assume you knew that all along, so 2 days.

But that's all. Cleanup the next day is the responsibility of the bride and groom. Their wedding, their responsibility. There is no such thing as "your duties". A bridesmaid is an honoured friend, not a servant.

First off, the groomsmen, the fathers, whoever the suits belong to can take them back. Never heard of a bridesmaid doing that.

Drop off cake stands? Where did they come from? Who owns them? Why do they need to go back the next day? Do they belong to individuals? they can claim them at the bride's mother's house at their leisure.

I do understand that certain venues make the party clean it up themselves. Fine. But you do not have to do this yourself. Draft some groomsmen to help, and put yourself in charge.

And I would refuse any day after errands, particularly because you are not local.

wow, bridesmaid and emcee. Make sure you get a microphone to carry with you, so you are not running over to the bandstand and back to your table for every announcement.

Completely unreasonable. Your "duties" and when the ceremony ends. Tell her to hire a personal assistant. It's one thing to ask, but once you said "no" she should have let it go. She's being incredibly selfish and rude.

EDIT:

"I was the MOH but am the only Bridesmaid left now (started with 5 of us a year ago). A few dropped out and she fired a few"

This person is not worth your time. Fulfill your "duties" for the ceremony, and after that, I suggest getting this toxic person out of your life.

She sounds likes she doesn't even deserve to have you as a friend. The fact that other bridesmaids dropped out or were "fired" says a lot too. She is using you like a doormat.

Well as she is being rude about you having a life of your own...she is being unreasonable.

Are you the only Bridesmaid or something?

Oh, you are...Well clearly if she cant keep bridesmaids she is being unreasonable.

I would tell her while you are happy to help out, you are not her servant.

You wont be doing everything for her.

She has family members she could ask for help too.