What do you do when a wedding gift is unwanted...?

Question

For my brother-in-law's wedding, my husband and I gave him and his new wife his and her Swiss Army Watches.  Admittedly it was a bit of a rash decision on our part.  We were at a silent auction and my husband thought it was a good idea, so we bid on them and got them.  The symbolism of being in sync and all was kind of sweet, we thought, and even if watches aren't really so stylish, they are still really nice watches.

So a week or so after the wedding they send us an email saying they're beautiful watches but they really don't wear watches.  Could we return them and they could choose something else, they asked.

I responded that we couldn't actually return them as they were from a silent auction, however, I gave them a list of things they might do with them, trying to be funny and make light of what I saw as an awkward situation.  (Save them for your kids, turn them into Christmas decorations, regift them etc...)

I never got a response.  We've been in touch since then but they've never said another word about it.  Should I have just said I'd take the watches back and just kept them for ourselves?  Do you think they took my response as b*tchy?  What do you make of this whole situation?

Common Sense · Accepted Answer

You did exactly what I would have done, humor them.

Listen, this was a gift.  Gifts that are received are not returnable.  Not at all.  The bride and groom were VERY class less when they asked you to return the watches and pick something else.  How rude and how absolutely tacky of them!!

Loved your response.  Drop it and don't mention it again.

Funny thing is, I have received gifts, over the years, that I was not crazy about.  But, I kept them and put them aside.  Low and behold, times change, tastes change and guess what, I use every gift I have received at one time or another.  So glad I kept everything.

For my wedding, my grandparents gave me their wedding china, which unbeknownst to me, they agreed to give to the first grandchild who got married. My sister was furious as she wanted that china and joked that she would have gotten married first if she knew she would have gotten the china.  Well, I will admit that I was not crazy about the pattern or the colors and I actually thought of giving the set of twelve place settings to my sister when the time came that my grandparents passed away.  Over the years, I fell in love with that china and my heart sinks into my chest when I think about how I once wanted to give it away.  Thank goodness my grandparents lived a good long time for me to realize that I cherish their gift as one of my fondest belongings.

Kiss Me Kate · Answer

A gift is a gift--they should have accepted them gracefully--but ok--maybe they had something else they really needed--it was a bit tacky of them to try to return them--but it wasn't to be--so they dropped it....it may be that your joking around struck them the wrong way---I personally would have laughed--but maybe they thought you were being a wiseass...lol...if I were you-and you cherished your friendship with these people (and really did want those watches...lol)...I'd apologize for the joking and offer to take them back and get something else.... but that's only if I really wanted the watches...lol...

Tom Barrister · Answer

You did nothing wrong at all.  You gave them a gift.  In my opinion, they were rude to ask you to return the watches.   

You might have told them that it was okay by you if they sold them, i.e. on Ebay, Craigslist, etc.  They probably did that anyway.

Sue B · Answer

I take it to be a bad taste in wedding gifts.    By you trying to be funny  was like a cold slap in the face at their union as a new couple.   Shame on you.

Anonymous · Answer

just drop it.

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What do you do when a wedding gift is unwanted...?

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