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We are separating , but he really dosent want to leave . Any advise please !?
We are having problems , I told him that either we work it out or separate, he rather separate, take a break from each other, taste the waters n see what happen... (bunch of bs to me)... but still want to live in the same house ... I can't handle that. I love him. And on top of all that , I found flirtatious emails between him and a coworker . Now his phone is blocked. An he refuse to unlock it. He said that I should base out relationship on how he treats me, not on what he have on his phone.( again bs)
I told him that he need to b out by April and he finally agreed , But I truly think his clothes wi b out b4 that... I Haven't done it bcus we both have 1 children from a prev relationship living in the house
And I don't have the heart to put his kid out in the street... They do have family that live near by though... Any advise on wether I should wait or not, also should I not b rude to him? I cnt help it... I'm so hurt... Any advise please ??
We have been married for 7 years
2 Answers
- .Lv 77 years agoFavorite Answer
You cannot force him to leave the marital home, so unless you two choose to legally separate them him moving out is up to him...doesn't sound like he's interested in repairing the marriage, or he'd be focused on doing that and not on flirting with other women (and whatever else he may be doing)...
What purpose would be served by being rude to him??? That wouldn't change anything, and would make it more uncomfortable for everyone while you two are still living together...be civil, at least...remember, the kids can't help that their parents aren't getting along, so neither of you should be a party in making this issue harder for them...they didn't get ask to be brought into it, and they shouldn't have to be uncomfortable or frightened in any way, because you and he aren't getting along anymore...
Best wishes this works out for the best...
- bojLv 77 years ago
My comments are in reference to your response below:
"Thank you so much ... You made my day.! I truly think there's no coming bck from this one. Today we had a talk and I made him agree on working things out. But that means that I need to let him do things his way... I want a divorce, but I don't have any actual facts of infidelity. Dont know what to do"
When I said don't accept nothing less than what you want, that meant not to let him do things his way. You dictate how you want to remedy the situation & save your marriage. I suggest seeing a couples therapist who has working knowledge of marriage counseling. As for the infidelity, some of the signs to look for are change in habits like his computer or cell phone, hygiene, how he dresses, unaccounted for time, attitude or irritability towards you, unaffectionate, lack of sex, change in sexual appetite or style, wants more privacy & the list goes on.
If he is willing to work things out he will come to a reasonable compromise with you on how to go about it so don't be afraid to ask for what you want. Whatever you do don't file for divorce until you are absolutely sure its what you want & what will make you happy. Remember DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU & YOUR CHILD & WHAT WILL MAKE '''YOU''' HAPPY!
