I'm feeling exhausted.Can't even walk or smile.What to do?

Hi everyone,

My parents been unemployed for 4 years now with no benefits.Everything's drained and they enrolled me in a med school as I got a scholarship. They've lost the ability to earn any longer because of grave diseases and are in a limbo.My father says that he's gonna die real soon and doesn't care about what happens to me.I couldn't work because my parents forced me to take up MBBS as it's prestigious to them and I don't have any capital or contacts to come out of college as it also carries a $6000 indemnity. I've been humiliated very much and am now on the verge of destitution.I'm trying to be brave,watching motivational videos to somehow grit my teeth and drag through,but lately(for about a year),I have lost my will.I don't do it consciously.I just lost it.I can't get it back no matter what.I can't even cry.I have lost the desire to conform to even basic social etiquette.I dress haphazardly.I'm weird with all people.I don't see the point in making an effort because four years of my efforts have gone down the drain and the situation is hopeless.All I pray for is to just stop existing.It's very painful to go out and talk with anyone.I can't smile no matter how hard I force myself.I am feeling exhausted all the time.I can't even walk with a normal gait.I am sighing most of the time.I can't even think coherently.I even stammer when I speak.I know that it is the hopelessness that I'm confronted with.I want to find a way out.Something at the least to fake my emotions.