My wife's family don't invite me to things?

Question

So my wife and I have been married for 2 years and generally I get along really well with her family. However recently there's been a few times that her family have had a party or organised a social event and invited my wife but not me.
In this age of social media she just assumed I had been invited to one and another she figured it wasn't something I would like to go to but it really hurts that they don't invite me. 
Most recently though I was asked to babysit the kids so the parents (my wife's cousins) could go to a party, and then I find out my wife was invited with her best friend to the party while I'm babysitting. 
Am I being to sensitive?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It's basic etiquette that invitations are issued to engaged/married couples as a single social unit, that neither can be invited as single but the two must be invited jointly.* Your wife should be "running interference" for you is her family is inviting her alone, as if she were single. Or at least letting them know she's not comfortable with invitations that don't include you.

*Of course there are some occasions where it's OK to include only one spouse, like a family meeting that doesn't include in-laws, like a ladies' bridal/baby shower or a pre-wedding boys'/girls' night out, like a work related event for employees only or club event for members only.

Kindness is Everywhere · Answer

Hangout with your friends lol, don't care about wife's family

Ace Shorty · Answer

1st off, I wouldn't consider her cousins as family, granted they are related but her family would consist of her siblings and parents. You should come before her best friend, I would  ask her about this. I wouldn't let myself be used like this by her cousins.

PhilosophyAddict · Answer

I would be insulted too Claire. Maybe they are homophobic?

stranger · Answer

no , not sensitive , however keep the good relationship with your wife.Maybe you can give her a hint that you are not happy with what is going on

Grace · Answer

You're giving her too much freedom .martied life isn't just about herself and her family. It's up to you to decide how you want your life to be..

Anonymous · Answer

You are being used.

sunshine_mel · Answer

Are you and your wife literally not communicating?

You're a social unit; you should get invited together. It may be that they're inviting her assuming the invitation is extended. If this isn't the case - you two need to talk, and she needs to talk to her family if there's an issue.

The Pupa · Answer

So you dont have to go to a social event with your in laws?? This is a good thing. Who the **** wants to hang around in laws?

♠ Merlin ♠ · Answer

Not being sensitive here AT ALL

They ask you to babysit so your wife can go out with someone else???

Instead of letting all this happen, why isnt your wife standing up for your/your relationship/HER life choices here??
her family are flat out ignorant and she is allowing it

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My wife's family don't invite me to things?

11 Answers