Bruce B

We publish a magazine and are a very small company. I want a simple sales tracking system for our sales person. I have looked at Bentos and Podio which seem very promising. I might also mention our budget is very tight. I don't need a super system, just something a better than an Excel Spreadsheet. Thank you in advance for your help.

I found out this week one of my co-workers is doing work on the side for our competition AND using work equipment and time to do it. She told me of this over drinks. WE're friends. It was in confidence. I played it cool when I found out, now I am heartbroken and ticked off. I wish she would have NEVER told me this. What do I do? Anonymously report her? Flat out tell her to quit or I will take her down? Mature clear thinking people with any sense of ethics wouldn't do it. I am so freaking mad. And to make matters worse we are a VERY small company so if I do report, there isn't a whole lot of narrowing down. Seriously though, this might be worth the end of a friendship. Who would do this? Stupid.

I am curious about several things that go on in this show. How do the undercover bosses end up with the people that have the major personal issues? Are employees researched before hand? Or is it just luck of the draw-everyone has a story to tell type scenario? And do only the four or five employees filmed get a special perk or does that happen to several employees? Any other info?

Every year our local radio station (before the numb nards in charge changed the format) would play a clip. It was a kind of country Christmas setting. Ma and Pa and Red feather were the characters I remember. It was just hilariously weird. Does anyone know or remember this? I would love to find this somewhere. Thanks in advance and Merry Christmas.

I have an G3 Ibook, 12 inch. It was such a good little workhorse. A few days ago I begain experiencing trouble. Once the startup process is complete, I get the spinning beach ball of death. I can't do jack. I don't have the original discs. I have tried starting in safe mode to no avail. Do I now have an Ibook paperweight? ANY ideas are welcome. Thank you.

We have a foriegn exchange student at our house. I'm not sure where he is from but he told us he was a cannibal. Well, we all laughed and were cool with that. But, when I came home tonight...he was eating my parents.

What do I do?

Oh yeah...his name is Steve. Steve the cannibal. Who ate my parents.

I am so angry about this. I go up to this guys place and its so weird...This guy is so popular that I have to wait to get in and see him. And then he lets me in. Invites me to kick back in his recliner. But like WAAYyyyy back. But its cool. Im comfortable. And THEN he puts some kind of device on my face. I think..MY GOD...he's drugging me. And I start to feel strange. AND THEN...He puts his gddamed fingers in my MOUTH.

That's when I snapped.

I just went nuts and beat the living crap out of him. And the cops came and ARRESTED ME!!

Well...How the hell was I supposed to know HE WAS A DENTIST.

I wanted to be totally honest on my resume. Here are some things I think are worth including. What do you think?

*Won't poop pants while working.

*Never had rabies.

*Can read and knows what make car go vroom vroom.

*That arrest in vermont CANNOT be proven.

*LIES LIES..ALL LIES. B@STARDS! DIE ARARAGHHCCHHH!

I mean...things like this can only help...can't they? right?

I ran through the halls at work this morning with a banana sticking out of my pants yelling "I've got yellow jaundice! I've got yellow jaundice!"

NO one on laughed. In fact one lady had tears in her eyes. And then later some attorney called me. And my boss sent me home. What the heck!! I guess some people just don't have a sense of humor.

I have debating between a badger or a wolverine for our four year old? Are there pros and cons to each? Is one more kid friendly? Wolverines seem kind of high maintenance to me.

Grooming tips?

Thoughts?

Or sister, or you.

It makes this noise when watching the SCI-FI channel, and the color red comes on (most often with while watching that stupid "Who wants to be a Super Hero). Any ideas?

I noticed David Hasselhoff is judging some crazy show this year. Nicknamed "The Hass."..Or maybe the "The Hoff." I dont really care.

Carrie Fisher is a judge on "The Lot."

What the hell. Is reality tv where old alcy has beens go to die?

Okay-here's the clip

http://youtube.com/watch?v=L5Ic9xY9mzY

I think its hilarious, but how does he pull it off? Is it okay to use the raw language in front of those kids? Was Snoop Dog's voice added later? This freaks me out, someone please help.

I don't think that me running up to my female boss and yelling "Time for milking Bossie," and then grabbing her breasts and screaming "HONK HONK...Milk Truck a Commin'." is grounds for sexual harassment.

This is just a joke. I mean come on. And it really was raining so I needed the raincoat. And i had just been to the dentist so the drool was from the novicane.

Crimany people...give a guy a break.

Our cat came home a couple of nights ago. Her hair is all messed up and her eyes are all red and bloody. She is foaming at the mouth and making horrible noises.

We let her sleep with the kids, she bit both of them that night and now they are running around the house with diarrhea and foaming at the mouth. They seem to be speaking in tounges.

Do you think they are now zombies and must be killed? Or was it just a good old fashioned case of rabies, which i think can be cured with a dose of cod liver oil?

I taught that monkey to read, write, smoke, wear pants and jugle fire. Then one day I noticed he had a small stockpile of explosives and firearms in his cage. I said, "Clean that mess up you damed dirty ape." He then came back with a word he had heard all his life..."NO." That's when I shot him.

I WILL NOT be responsible for Planet of the Apes.

Was I wrong for carrying this joke question thing too far? Is it just too extreme for most folks here?

Beware of the beast called man.

Does anyone know the secret to doing this. I can't seem to get it.

I'm supposed to gargle with unleaded gasoline...then without swallowing any, spit it high into the air. Then light a cigarette while catching the gas in my mouth.

After having my stomach pumped twice and four skin graphs from third degree burns...I just can't seem to get it.

This trick would surely enhance my act. I know its a crowd pleaser. Someone...please help.