Isabel

I started my new job the week before the holidays started, my current immediate supervisor will be leaving in October, and the person that was her back up will be taking her position. She told me that the idea is for me to take his position in that case...

Does that mean that I will get promoted also? Or will that mean that I will only have his current responsibilities but under my same position/salary? I’m afraid to ask since I have no experience in this field (albeit I’m overqualified due to my previous experience in another field, which is the reason they hired me)... but I'm debating if maybe it's not a bad idea to bring this up to the current boss and ask.

I’m afraid to ask because it feels like it will be so soon, this “promotion” will take place even before my probation is due... this is a very well respected organization, I didn’t even negotiate my salary when I was hired, since I didn’t want to lose this opportunity. But at the same time, I feel it would be unfair to become the leader in my department but be remunerated the same as I am right now...

What are your thoughts?

I started my new job the week before the holidays started, they’ve been waiting for me since October though... but i couldn’t start because my school didn’t verify my credentials for the longest time.

Anyhow... my current immediate supervisor will be leaving in October, and the person that was her back up will be taking her position. She told me that the idea is for me to take his position in that case.... does that mean that I will get promoted also? Or will that mean that I will only have his current responsabilities? I’m afraid to ask since I have no experience in this field (albeit I’m overqualified due to my previous experience in other field, which is the reason they hired me)....

I’m afraid to ask because it will be so soon, this “promotion” will take place before my probation is due... this is a very well respected organization, I didn’t even negotiate my salary since I didn’t want to lose this opportunity. But at the same time, I feel it would be unfair to become the leader in my department but be remunerated the same...

What are your thoughts?

I met a guy last July and we dated up until August. It was never official but it was on the road to be official until I sabotaged everything.

I was aware of the fact that he was (is) a good catch, but, I had lingering pain/fear after my breakup in March 2017.

By October, I felt ready to date again, but I always felt embarrassed to reach out. After all, I pushed him away by talking about marriage so soon (before we were even official). I was scared of wasting my time again and finding out that he wasn't going to marry me years later and end up in my mid-30's alone.

If I had met him now, I would have used common sense and not talk about marriage because *anyone* would feel pressure no matter what.

However, even when we broke up, he said I am very sweet, that he remained very curious about me and that I have treated him better than anyone he's ever dated before.

We spoke for our birthdays after the breakup, and then he randomly liked my pictures on Facebook --but I didn't read much into that when it happened (until today).

However, he texted me yesterday and we talked for almost an hour after that, just updates about how's life is going. Nothing else happened and we just went to our NYE's celebrations.

I know he really liked me, but I don't know if he's still scared about that marriage conversation... if he would like to date me or what.

I remain very interested and I wish to date him again. What can I do to make him ask me out? I feel like I missed out as well.

My ex and I broke up in early Spring but I went all crazy and did everything I wasn't supposed to do: begged, pleaded, harrassed him and his family, textecalled nonstop --you name it.

Initially, the breakup had the possibility of reconciliation, I knew he loved me and felt bad, and he himself told me back then that he didn't want me out of his life. Up until 3 months after, I know I could have gotten him back if I was patient... but I wasn't.

Things got increasingly worse between July-August, by then, I said A LOT of VERY hurtful things that I am very ashamed of. We yelled back and forth and the last time we spoke he yelled at me "can you please leave me alone?!!" After that I decided I will respect his wishes & leave. I lost him.

I called him last week for the first time after that last yelling match... but he didn't pick up, so I texted that I wanted to see him to talk to him when he gets a chance. To my surprise, he replied that he's busy and another day would be better. I didn't think he would reply at all and I thought he was just being nice and would not reach out after that.

2 days after that, he called. He said he was afraid of reaching out, and I said it's understandable and don't blame him. We spoke a bit about everything and I told him I would like to see him in person in order for me to tell him what I needed to. He agreed.

Is there any slight chance of reconciliation once I apologize for all the things I said?

Why would he still be open to talk?

I usually get the updates on every person usually engage with... but, for whatever reason, I have these two friends whose statuses updates or uploads/tagged pictures never appear in my home page... and I realize after I click ont heir names to because it says "2 new posts" with a blue circle in their profile picture on my friend's list... when I see their updates, it's been commented on/liked by other people and it's too late for me to like because it would be obvious for me that I'm stalking if I like something 5 days late...

Is there any way one can control who can get notified of your updates?

My ex an I broke up in March, but nobody knew until April. In April, I remember I messaged her on Facebook for advice, since she went through an on and off relationship with my ex's brother for many years and I wanted to know her opinion about my situation with my now ex. I thought she would sympathize with me and give me some perspective, especially since she went through breakups (I'm not in that kind of circle since everyone around me has always been continuously happy with only minor discussions here and there)... but she just left my message in read and never replied. I remember I felt bad because if it was me, I would have seen a woman that was clearly heartbroken looking for answers...

Anyways, I deleted her and her husband on Facebook and unfollowed them on Instagram a few weeks ago. I was debating whether or not to delete the aunts and cousins but I figured to keep them since they were not really "involved" in the breakup.

Anyways... today I found out she unfollowed me on Instagram... which is ok I guess, but I also find weird. I mean, I remember when my bff's 1st husband was heartbroken about my friend cheating on him and leaving, he deleted and blocked everyone he met through her on social media, and the only reason I don't follow him anymore is because he blocked me. But if he had only deleted me, I would have understood why he did that, but I would have not unfollowed him.

The breakup was very messy, and they think of me as if I am the Evil Queen even though he was the one who cheated on me and screwed up all the time. They even know all this but still think he's the angel and I overreacted with the breakup.

Anyways, I had all his family, cousins, aunts and family friends on Facebook and Instagram, but I don't really mind keeping the extended family, however, having his brother and SIL really annoys me, especially because his brother looks at every single story I post on My Instagram stories.

I am thinking of blocking the brother and unblock him right away, not for the sake of blocking his presence, but I don't want them to be aware of my new posts when I post my stuff. Especially because he thinks I am the bad guy of the story like I said before.

Should I block him only? Or should I block him and his wife? Or should I block him, the wife and the rest of the family?

Is there anything I can do to get him to crawl back with the agony I've been feeling all these months and beg for my forgiveness and love?

I am dying here it's been months of angst after I did nothing wrong and he's the one punishing me like I was the one who cheated (he did), like I was the one who took him for granted (he did), like I was the ugly loser (he was, everyone said I was out of his stupid league), like I was the one who didn't make an effort (he didn't).

I am so hurt that all my efforts went unnoticed and he took away my youth, because it doesn't matter how "hot" I still am, I am now 32, and will be filtered out by guys, it's not the same as when you are 27. He stole my life and he HAS TO LOVE ME!!

He was very bad with dates... I even had to remind him of his moms birthday. So in the years we dated I usually had to mention it a few weeks in advance. But now he won't know...... should I call him or text him with the excuse to remind him or something? We ended in very bad terms and I hope he comes back at some point :(.

Well, actually my ex and I broke up in late spring, but kept in touch up until summer, after that, we got in touch every 2 weeks or so, and ended up fighting more and more. I don't want to revise what happened, but it was bad.

I decided to go NC about 2 weeks ago... but it's weird now because my birthday is coming next Monday, and his birthday will be the first week of October.

I know he won't remember my birthday, since he was so bad with dates (I was the one who had to remind him of his mom's birthday)... but I think I will feel bad to spend my day at work and noone to be with after I get home. My family is not close to me and my friends and I are having an "early birthday" this Friday.

I would love for him to just come over that one day, but realistically speaking, that won't happen.

Do you think I should just let it go and never reach out again or simply continue NC until his birthday in early October?

He was somewhat involved in our breakup, since... they are best friends basically (my ex had friends, but not close friends)... I eliminated him and his wife from Facebook and unfollowed them on Instagram, but they still follow me. I didn't eliminate the rest of the family and I eliminated them because they're on my ex boyfriend's side and it hurt my feelings to know that blood IS thicker than water in that family (my family is not like that, they tell me how it is)...

Anyhow, my ex doesn't have social media, only his brother and SIL... his SIL doesn't always follow my stories, but my ex's brother ALWAYS does... why would he do that? I'm thinking about blocking them and unblocking right away just so that I don't have them being nosy... but at the same time, I like them to see what my ex is missing (everybody knew I was way out of his league)... I don't know...

Why does he look at each and every single one of my stories?

Well, actually my ex and I broke up in late spring, but kept in touch up until summer, after that, we got in touch every 2 weeks or so, and ended up fighting more and more. I don't want to revise what happened, but it was bad.

I decided to go NC about 2 weeks ago... but it's weird now because my birthday is coming next Monday, and his birthday will be the first week of October.

I know he won't remember my birthday, since he was so bad with dates (I was the one who had to remind him of his mom's birthday)... but I think I will feel bad to spend my day at work and noone to be with after I get home. My family is not close to me and my friends and I are having an "early birthday" this Friday.

I would love for him to just come over that one day, but realistically speaking, that won't happen.

Do you think I should just let it go and never reach out again or simply continue NC until his birthday in early October?

My hair is naturally black, I used to dye it a lot before, but then I styopped dying for about 2 years until 2014 (light brown), then dark brown by end of 2014, then a dark blonde balayage throughout 2015, then dyed it very dark brown by end of 2015, then caramel highlights by fall 2016 and then very dark brown again by Christmas just before I changed it to magenta for spring this year.

Since my base was so dark, this magenta looks amazing. But it's been almost a year keeping up with this color (which reminds me why I loved having a balayage) and it stains my towels and all when I shower. It's tiring. As you may notice, I used to go back to dark brown by the end of each year before lightening again (to always start with a dark base), but this is my first time red and I don't know my options.

I have medium olive skin and brown eyes. So far, every hair color I have had has suited me great. However, I don't know what I should do now in order to get a color closer to my natural hair color but that I don't have to worry about stains and growth.

I am thinking about getting chestnut or auburn brown, but I don't know how to even achieve that considering I have a magenta base.

My sister and I have had a horrible year, so we decided to relax and forget about all bad things and having one actually good thing this year, so we decided to go to Cabo for Labor Day weekend.

I live in NYC and she lives in FL. So, we bought the roundtrip flights on Expedia, and the hotel stay in Groupon.

The thing is, that there was a tropical storm (almost hurricane) practically the exact same days of our trip (Started on Friday until Saturday) -our trip was Fri-Mo.

We both had a layover in Mexico City, I was there first (scheduled to fly to Cabo at 7am) and my sister was arriving at nighttime. My flight to Cabo was cancelled last minute, and they didn't notify me nor my sister that her flight was going to be cancelled as well until AFTER she left FL. I was so pissed, because it's a scam, it's like they wanted us to actually take the flights without letting us know about the climate situation so that we couldn't cancel.

They thought that they were doing me a great favor by changing my flight to Cabo for Sunday night (are they serious? I was leaving Monday at noon!), denying me to change it for anytime sooner, while my sister's flight was changed to Saturday morning. It did't make sense.

Now, the hotel says that since it's a Groupon, our only choice is to change the dates for another vacation weekend. But the Airline says it's not their fault and basically, my flight back to JFK was deducted from my flight to Cabo...

I want to get back with my ex and even though that was a possibility back then... I ruined it with my post breakup clinginess despite being a good gf for two years:(

We had a horrible breakup, but before the breakup, he always said what a great girlfriend I was. I admit I became annoying after the breakup and did a lot of bad things. But he is the love of my life and I really don't want to lose him.

One of the reasons for the breakup is fixed: he wanted to live together before getting married, and I told him that my parents are very devout Catholics and wouldn't like that, so he would either need to speak to them or at least be engaged by the time we move in together, but he said that he has never seen something like that, and I told him he's inconsiderate and how he would jeopardize my relationship with my family. Anyways, my mom has seen me suffer all these months and yesterday told me that she has seen how nowadays people is doing that. And that she and my dad spoke and came to the conclusion that my happiness is more important than anything to them, and that if I have to do that to be with him, then, I have their blessing.

Anyways, I really want him back, what do you think "he doesn't know if we'll be back" means? o you think that if I leave him quiet and concentrate on his exam that he has in October he will come back and forgive me?

We broke up in March.

The reason I broke up with him is because I suffer of winter blues, plus I had a problem with my career that had me all stressed out. Of course, those are not the reasons, but what I'm saying is that I was very anxious back then due to external factors, plus his father was sick and he was also having to focus in his career.

He has always been a non expressive person, but... in that moment of my life, I needed reassurance that everything will be alright, and I broke up with him.

I know I could say I deserve someone that has more emotional intelligence. But in the end, HE IS the love of my life. I also have to admit that I thought he would wake up and run after me. I know if I had stayed quiet, I would have received a phonecall from him within weeks or months... but I couldn't handle not talking to him... so I called and texted nonstop, we fought all the time, I was needy, then one day I would apologize and then the week after I would call again crying because he has not called.

I have done everything I was not supposed to do... neediness, clinginess, threats... but I love him guys, he really IS the one for me.

Is there any hope for me to get him back? I already apologized (again) after the last turmoil but also told him that I feel bad that he has told everything about my threats to his family... I feel naked. I know I should have not done that, but I was in despair, and all his family knows is this, not how devouted I was when with him :(