Lauren L

(this will be long sorry) im 22 live with my parents, work part time

I've had depression for as long as I've known, yes i'm on medication and its been boosted several times doesn't help, I also have aspergers and haven't been able to get therapy (more like im tired of chasing up for help and not getting any for the past 3 years) I have no friends never really have, no relationships. I don't like partying or drinking etc. I constantly either obsessively clean and save and cut myself off or go out and buy lots of stuff (clothes, books video games etc) but am never satisfied, and there's never an in between. I'm atheist and wish I wasn't so I could either look up to something or be angry at something. I'm not sure if I hate myself or humanity more, even though i'm aware of good things and improvement in the world which makes me feel like a jerk not to mention I have a roof over my head wifi etc which makes me feel like an ungrateful piece of crap, but I don't try to contribute to the world either which I think automatically makes me a bad person. and I think everything is meaningless and everyone else says "create your own meaning" but then I just feel stupid for not having one or a 'purpose/direction' and eel negative about everything Why do I do anything and what should I do now? I can't help having a negative opinion on everything I do, I either feel sad or just empty or angry at myself.

ok this is gonna sound weird, but whenever I'm feeling a strong emotion, or nothing or sometimes just at random times, its like I'm a completely different person, I can go from apathetic to happy to sad, but its like each emotion has a different personality, my opinion changes, interests, morals, i mean its obviously not multiple personality disorder because I'm aware and remember, but its like I have no control, like a switch is flipped and I'm totally different, even my writing, is this normal?

I don t know whats going on, but its all over the internet and stuff, and every time I look it up I get different articles all saying different things not explaining what even started whatevers happening, can anyone dumb it down for me?

So I'm currently working in an A4 size sketchbook, but realised I prefer working smaller, I also have another blank A4 sketchbook, but several smaller ones, I'm not really into the one I'm currently working in, should I stop and move on to a smaller one? or do I just get the larger ones over with since it would be a waste not to use them? but at the same time is it worth it if I'm not as motivated to use it?

I live in South Wales in the UK and this morning me and my neighbours smelled gas then we found out its all over south Wales (seriously if you don t believe me look it up) anyway seriously any experts out there with an idea what this is or if it s dangerous or anything?

Also does anyone else wish they could?

Obviously I m not famous but every time I watch it I admit I d do each challenge for £50 plus having bland meals everyday miles away from civilisation and being surrounded by exotic insects sounds like heaven

So I'm re workig through my old maths book and in the mid massive section/improper fractions and found a multiplication where 2 is next to 1 over or times 1 next to 2 over 3 (sorry I don't know how to phrase it) written kin da like 2 1/4 × 1 2/3 (which theneeds converts to) = 9/4 × 5/3 (9 is over 4 and 5 is over 3) I can figure out the maths after that. But I don't understand how 2 1/4 converts to 9/4 or 1 2/3 converts to 5/3? Can anyone explain step by step?

Ok this probably sounds weird, I have 4 cats, one of them is a black Persian cat, some times he seems to teleport, he definitely recognises me (if it's him) but I noticed a black Persian cat outside my house ounce, thought it was him, opened the door to call him in, and he was actually sitting in the doorway waiting for me to come home, simular things keep happening more recently. How do i tell if there is actually two of them living in the same house, and tel them apart if they act so simular?

She's about 5 years old a red/rose chillian , she last molted around Christmas, I usually give her a locust ounce a week (if she eats it within 24 hours, if she doesn't I take it out, ) she has a heat pad, and plenty of water, has a nice plump abdomen (not to big either) seems all in all healthy, so did the locust I fed her yesterday, she ate it, but okay I found pink slime by her water dish, it wasn't as big as the locust so it couldnt have been the whole thing if she tori up or something, she seems fine right now, she's chilling and still moves if I touch her, I cleaned up the water dish and the surrounding area, but I'm worried if I made her sick or something, any ideas?

I'm 21 fem, live with my parents unemployed, haven't had the motivation to do anything for a while but still want to be an artist (also my mother's an artist) and one of her customers who's become her friend online even though she lives in America and we live in the UK (also she's Christian, I'm atheist) wants to send me money to 'help me start my own bussiness' . I don't know her, I've never talked to her, but according to my mother since she has no children and she's been talking about me, she feels close to me. This makes absolutely no sense to me, I've been trying to tell her to stop but she's adamant about sending it. Do you think she wants me to talk to her or do work for her? Or do you think she's doing it because she 'believes' it's right? Or does she think I need more help? I just want to be left alone to make my own choices but everyone tries to force their damn kindness on me, it's like an extra pressure cause i know I suck and I'm not grateful enough, hell I'm to lazy to take everyone's 'motivating' words to do anything. Why can't they just hate me and be honest? Or at least let me go. (ok this kinda turned into a rant but if anyone read it and can give advice, thanks)

Assuming you could theoretically, no oxygen, co2 , but you could still observe and test the inside (somehow, forget the method) what do you think would happen, would the jar compound on itself? Be impossible to open? Would something else be there? What do you think?

I usually draw all the time, indoors or out, but tonight my parents are going out , bar to bar, or pub to pub, their all pretty well lit anyway (also I dont drink) and i would like to draw in my sketchbook, any tips on doing this, with possible drunk people and crowds all around?

Obviously I know they're both the same guy, but riddle logic wise, who comes first?

For example:

Does batman live in Bruce Wayne's basement? Or does Bruce Wayne live in batman attic?

I've seen things on nature channels of red ants/army ants devouring t arantulas and other animals, but I was wondering if they would still do the same to a tarantulas molted skin, is there only certain types of antthat would be able todothis? Or would they not want it because there's no real meat or blood (nutrients rather) inside, or could they use it for building? Any any keepers, lovers or professionals welcome if they have the knowledge

(I live in south Wales, dunno if that helps, anyway) when ever its warmer, and bees or wasps are about i always find wasps (not bees definitely wasps) either on my or my parents tooth brushes, my parents usually ask me to fling them out the window, or I have to pick them off cause they're stuck (which I gently so the wasps don't sting me) obviously we wash them afterwards, we go through different brand of tooth paste and tooth brushes all the time, so i dont think their attracted to one type. Has anyone got any info on this? has anyone else had simular experiences, or is it just me?

I know you have to rest in order to repair muscles and get stronger but what if you walked 4 miles on mostly even ground one day then went on a 7 mile hike the next with good weather conditions. I'm a 20 year deal female who's pretty healthy and just asking as I have to walk home from college on Thursdays but every Friday I go hiking . Will I be OK if I just rest up the weekend?

All of my cats (got 4) like to lick bumpers of cars for some reason, and when they turn when I call them they have a mental (but funny) face on them, at first I thought my one cat was licking bugs of off one car or something but then I started to notice he started to make a habit of it with any and all vehicles that park near by (don't worry it's safe roads) and then I noticed that my other cats were doing, but also other stray and neighbours cats, I've discussed it with many other cat owners who haven't noticed it, but the car owners said they haven't washed their cars or anything, so what could it be? I'm honestly co side ring keeping them because it's like its their drug or something

Would everyone like automatically become 'rich (enough to pay the bill's at least) or would youtube straight up break?

I'm 20 years old, grew up drawing most of my life, just finished a 2 year foundation art course and quit doing any more because it has taught me nothing (other than endurance and some art teachers and colleges and courses suck, learned more life lessons than constructive practical ones, it was advertised as a learning experience, but I've been self taught all my life and there were no lessons with this, just deadlines and essays, not a total waste) but from being so busy in college I stopped creating art as a hobby and feel like I've just lost all heart, I always carry a sketchbook, but just end up doing a small doodle or town and have taken a year and a half to fill it (used to fill one per month) I really find it difficult to feel motivated or inspired (two very different things) I've got tones of art supplies left from college, and tones of free time between work, but I've began to hate my work and the process, I don't want to, I want to go back to the days where I would create hours on end. (wow real downer today huh? Sorry) I guess I'm just asking for personal advice from arties alike, plz don't say take another course, if I do it'll be in the future (already owe about 10thousand for the past 2 years, that being said, if any of my classmates going onto the 3rd year see this: "good luck suckers! Seriously you need it