I Sprout A Blueberry

This is a two for one question: first, your opinions on a 401k loan based on our situation. Second, do you think we're over-saving for retirement?

Here's the situation. I've been maxing out my 401k contributions at 12% since age 21. I've recently changed jobs (first job change) and at age 30, both my husband and I are eligible for pensions. My employer offers a 401k as well into which I'm investing 10% with a match of 100% up to 6.5%.

I estimate our combined pension benefit at age 65 (35 years from now) to be approximately $80k per year and the 401k balance to be well above $2m by retirement.

Today we are in need of cash to pay off high interest credit card debts that we're drowning under. We've changed our spending habits drastically, to the point of moving to a lower cost of living state, and now need to eliminate the debts.

I've looked high and low for alternatives, but it seems that a 401k loan is our only option to access enough cash to get these debts off our plate once and for all. So in your opinion, is the loan a sensible option in this situation and do you believe we're over saving for retirement by stashing 10% with plans to increase to 12 over the next year on top of pensions?

My 3-month has had very red cheeks for the past few days. Not a rash and she doesn't have a fever. She's been a bit fussier than usual, but still seems to be feeling just fine. Any idea what could be causing her redness? It's cool in the house and she hasn't been out in the sun either.

I'm looking for ways to use outgrown disposable diapers. I don't have nearly enough to donate - maybe 10 altogether - but still hate to throw them out. I've thought of dust cloths (nah), hats (ha).. that's all I can come up with.

Any ideas?

Does anyone have a clue who makes nice looking, good quality Halloween costumes other than Tom Arma? I'm not looking for Halloween Superstore type links, I can google "baby halloween costume" myself... rather a brand name or decent designer. I'm coming up with nothing but the same 50 itchy looking costumes.

At what age can I safely use my baby's arms to pull her from laying down to a sitting position? My 7-week old seems to love the motion of going from laying to sitting up, but I'm not sure that her arms are ready for it yet. I'm afraid of hurting those precious chubbies!

For those with a live-in nanny, how much do you pay them per week or month? And what accommodations do you provide other than room and board?

Do you pay them on the books or in cash?

I did everything in my power to get my 5-week old to cry tonight. I was a little (ok, a lot) nervous about her catching something from two 10 year olds that were playing with her today. When we got home she was so incredibly quiet, not making a peep, and it sent me into a panicked frenzy.

I swear I fussed with her for a good 45 minutes just to get her to cry, to make sure that she had the strength to cry and wasn't overcome by some horrible quick-onset virus. She fell right to sleep after a bottle and I even woke her up to give her a bath.

I feel like a jerk. She's fine, she was just in a really good mood. But once I had in my head that something might be wrong every little thing freaked me out. She stuck out her tongue and I thought it was swelling. She swatted at a toy and I thought she was having a seizure, and when she fell asleep I thought she was passing out from not being able to breathe well enough.

I'm really not the type to overreact - what the heck is wrong with me? Please tell me that someone else has gotten this worked up over absolutely nothing!

It appears that my four-week old is allergic to hypoallergenic formula. She has been on Alimentum for almost a week and still has bloody stools with mucous, that actually went away when we initially changed formula but returned today, and puffy eyes with red splotches underneath them. The poor thing is miserable.

Anyone know what's next? I think we've run full circle through Similac, I think - Advanced, Sensitive, Alimentum.

Does anyone have remedies for paw licking/chewing that have actually worked?

My Boston started licking and biting her paws in October. They are red and swollen, and nothing seems to help. It doesn't seem to be seasonal allergies because she's been affected in every season (we live in the Northeast). She's very much an inside dog and barely walks on grass or in anything funky that might cause a reaction.

We've tried tea tree oil spray, lotramin, Atopica, Rescue Remedy and apple cider vinegar. Nothing seems to help. The rescue remedy was because we realized she started licking as soon as I got pregnant and thought she might've been upset about it. She is in fact very nervous around the baby, but the Rescue Remedy doesn't help much, so who knows if that's actually the problem.

We'll try anything at this point, her paws look awful.

Baby clothing question - are size 0-3 and those just labeled "3 months" the same size? Or are the 3 month clothes bigger than 0-3? I'm afraid to take the tags off of the 3 month summer clothes!

I have a three week old daughter, and would like to know if any parents have left their child of this age laying alone while awake? I feel guilty not using every waking moment talking or singing to her and using that wakeful time to help her development, but sometimes she just seems so happy laying in her pack and play or bouncy seat staring into space.

I'm talking 15-30 minutes spent by herself spread throughout the day, not hours on end.

Do you think newborns need 'alone time'? I've read conflicting advice from experts - but most of it says to use every opportunity to talk to babies and work on their development. Do they mean that literally? Or is that information trying to encourage people who never talk to their children?

Antonietta or Lucia?

I'm in a tough position and would like to know what you would do.

I got severe poison ivy on my arms and face this weekend. Sunday was just a little spot, yesterday was getting bad - but as of this morning my face is several inches swollen and my eyes are close to swelling shut.

Here's the catch. I went to the doctor yesterday BEFORE my face was swollen because I knew what was coming. I wanted my usual shot in the behind (not my first bout of PI!), but being that there's a chance I might be pregnant, he couldn't give me a steroid shot. He offered to give me a blood test, but by the time the lab results come back, I'll already know one way or the other.

My question is, knowing full well that my eyes will be fully swollen shut by tomorrow, is this worth a trip to the ER where they can get pregnancy test resuts back immediately, and give me the shot if it's negative? If it's positive, I'll be in the same boat that I'm in right now anyway.

Are there any major reprocussions to having your eyes swollen shut, or is it just a pain in the butt? As you know, trips to the ER aren't cheap, even with health insurance.

I'm having trouble with the keyless entry and alarm in my 98 Cadillac Deville. Neither of the two remotes will unlock the doors - it started with one, and three days later the second remote stopped working.

I've found a good amount of information on the above, except it's all inconsistent with the fact that the alarm goes off (as in starts to sound) when I start the car, not vice versa.

So in short, when I use the key to open the door - which is the only way to unlock it - and then start the car, the alarm starts sounding. It generally does not stop when the car is put into gear or after any amount of time. Today it stopped after a few minutes, but started again when I opened the door to get out.

I really love this car, and it only has 50k miles on it. I hope it's nothing serious.

We are in the process of taking in a roomate. We own our house, and are renting a spare bedroom. Is the agreement subject to traditional landlord/tenant laws, or do they not apply in this situation?

One point in particular is that I would like to reserve the right to inspect the condition of our property at any time.

I've had a dull, mild headache for about 2 weeks and this morning I noticed a bruise on one eyelid. It looks like a makeup smudge, but is actually a purplish/black bruise.

Any thoughts? I thought the headache was seasonal allergies/sinus infection, and I've had a slight bloody nose for about a week.

We are having gift bags delivered to guests' hotel rooms before our wedding. So far, we have snacks/gum, water, tissue packs, sunscreen, lotion, chapstick and golf balls with our names & wedding date (wedding is at a golf resort).

Are we missing anything? Any other ideas for what can go in these bags. Note that these are NOT the favors, just a little 'extra' so each item should be under $1.

Has anyone ever changed an older dog's name?

I'm bringing home a two year old Boston, and I'm so in love with her but I hate her name. I've had the name Bogey in my head for years and always imagined that my dog would be named Bogey.

But being an adult, I'm afraid she won't adjust to a name change. If she won't adjust, I have no problem keeping her name as it is, but I don't know how much difference it really makes to the dog.

I've heard that it's your tone and motions that dogs respond to, and that they don't actually recognize words.

Is that true? Any insight?

Please know that I have the dog's best interests at heart and I just want to make her transition as easy and comfortable as possible. If the name change will cause her any confusion at all, I will not even consider it.

Obviously you are supposed to write thank you notes right after your wedding and cash checks after the notes go out, but we're in a difficult positon...

Our wedding isn't for another 6 weeks and guests who can't attend are sending checks. Typically we wouldn't cash the check till after we're married - but is it rude to float the checks for that long?

Also, do we send thank you notes for the early gifts now? They are traditionally the first note from the new "Mr. and Mrs." (which we aren't yet) and sent all at once.

We currently have an oil-fired coil type hot water heater - built into the furnace. With only two people in the house, we still can't get more than two minutes of a hot shower before it goes cold. The heat kicks up again in about 5 minutes, but it makes for a very uncomfortable shower.

Does anyone have experience with this type of water heater? Can we purchase a supplemental tank? The furnace is pretty old so we don't want to invest much right now.

Also, any thoughts on converting oil heat to solar energy? If we were to convert our energy source, we'd do the whole system - water, HVAC and heat. Estimated cost on 1500 sf house? We froze our butts off this winter keeping the heat in the low 60's and still paid about $2,500 - $3,000 for oil. We'd like to avoid a repeat next year.

Your input is appreciated! Thanks in advance.