1-Confused-man

It's been over two years since I posted here. Looking through my past questions and answer. I am sadly to say my marriage is over. What ever I learned from this forum, I didn't practice. It had gotten worst. I'm separated now and next year, the potential divorce. I had two years to rebuild my life. Nothing improved. There where moments but It had gotten worst. Any good words out there? Depression came and went. I'm in survival mode now. Do I still have a chance to revive my marraige? My wife still avoiding the divorce issues. She said don't push me to that level yet. She said "lets live day by day". LOL!!! I'm lost...

I have a machine that uses 18000w 3 phase 220v. What size of breaker can I use? Can I get a feed from a 3P sub panel?

Been restructuring my life to improve my self and at the same time trying to improve my marriage. But no matter what I do, my wife always put me down or gives no encouragements. I failed on our marriage due to poor business practice and not being the bread earner for the past few years. She solely supported the family while I keep on trying to reinvent myself. I became depress and being poscessive and not being productive. I snapped out of it and beginning to reinvent myself. Thought I was doing great. During our daily walk, we where talking about the progress of work on our yard deck and the cost, BAM! she made a comments that I don't know how to manage anything and being incapable of doing big task and that's why I failed in Life. All that came out of her because I told her the project is not within budget and we need additional funds to finish it. After that, I just ignored her and am still ignoring her.

I felt hurt because it's not the first time she did that. But I poured my heart into the project and managed the best of my abilities. The project is on time for mother day presentation but she didn't acknowledge the achievment. And now she siad those phrases really blow me away. I felt no matter what I do, I will never be a achiever. IMO, she know about how I feel and don't really care. I feel like to leave the relationship because it felt like a bottomless pit. There is no light at the end of the tunnel. Am I being sensitive? Am I loosing my patience? Am I a quitter?

I'm sorry to ramble about my issues. It's so easy wanting to quit on tough issues. But back to my question, once your spouse lose respect or trust of you, and no matter how hard you try, it's never enough. Should you quit and walk? Suck it up and dream on? or just live day by day with the needle in the heart.

I'm so depress and sad my marriage is a one way street. I love my wife but my wife don't love back. We've been married for 20+ years. We have our up and down and now she seem I not good enough for her. She took on a male friend as her confidant. I clearly state she is having an emotional affair with him. She adamant claim it's now what it seem. But admitted she have feelings for him like a best friend type. I don't know if there are any sexual relationship going on. All the writing are on the walls that she care about him more than me. She is being with me because of routine and marriage obligations. I feel like to throw in the towel because it pains me everytime I found out she did something with him and not with me. ie Asking him to her Office Xmas party instead of me, her husband. I can go on with more examples but what's the point... She is not physical attrached to him but mentally definitely. What should I do? still fight on ? or am I lying to myself that the marriage is dead and it's just waiting for her to say the words "It's over." I'm so spineless to call it quit because I still love her and see there is still a chance. Am I blind? Someone please slapped me out of this!!! I'm no longer a door mat to her to step on. I just wanted to know how much pain I can take to stand up to her and call it quit.

Sorry for any poor grammars, Just depress and wanted to type and vent.

Fellow webber's, I need help. I'm tired of feeling depress and having anxiety over my wife's love toward me. I need professional helps. I need my sanity back!!!! I can be happy and logical for one minute and sad and irrational the next. I turn to the web for un-bias feedbacks. It help but it's not sinking in. Any recommendations? I don't abuse drug, alcohol. I don't have much friends to turn to. I felt like a sad case with no where to turn to. TIA for entertaining my thoughts...

Just like to know how many married women here is tired of their husband behavoirs ,like the need to growing up, bad habits, etc... and is waiting for the right time to quit the marriage. Cheating is excluded from the cause. Just growing apart, ugly bad habits and personal outlooks.Years of being married will be nice for the answer. Also, how many years where you in the marriage before you realized the marriage is un-salvageable. Honest answer please.

P.S. When you say it's over, is it really over? If he really loved you and you saw imporvement, will you still go through with the divorce?

Ladie, ever fantasied about naughty event that is not with your husband? Or Ever texted with a male friend about kinky ideas just to be like one of the guys? Have this dilema with my wife, spied on her text with one of her male friends and I know it's inappropriate sexually. Didn't confront her with it but skirted the idea with her. She said it's just flirting among good friends when it happen. I don't buy it but don't have the balls to spill my findings. Guess my questions is, do most women that are comfidence about themselve freely express sexual overtone with their guys friends. Men does it among men, and women does it among themselve. But is it common among male-female friends with nothing more than bs'g around for a laugh.

I needed help badly. Thought I try it here first before I spent money on a therapist. I realize I depended too much to a point of obsession with my wife. I am driving her away due to my need for her being there for me when I need her. I will do anything for her without a thought of what am I doing at the moment. All I wanted to do is to please her. Seeing her makes me happy. As I'm typing this, I've already realize how focus I'm on her. I needed to ween myself from her! How? We have this big arguments recently and she said I smother her. I think I do. So What can I do to stop this actions? Are there self help books? Specific catergory of theraphist? Cold Turkey? I really needed to solve this obsession so I can be happy with myself and enjoy the world out there, Help?

I needed help badly. Thought I try it here first before I spent money on a therapist. I realize I depended too much to a point of obsession with my wife. I am driving her away due to my need for her being there for me when I need her. I will do anything for her without a thought of what am I doing at the moment. All I wanted to do is to please her. Seeing her makes me happy. As I'm typing this, I've already realize how focus I'm on her. I needed to ween myself from her! How? We have this big arguments recently and she said I smother her. I think I do. So What can I do to stop this actions? Are there self help books? Specific catergory of theraphist? Cold Turkey? I really needed to solve this obsession so I can be happy with myself and enjoy the world out there, Help?

Ladies, if you are in a long term relationship or marriage. Due to problems within your relationship you developed a special feeling toward someone that you associate / work with. How many here crossed the line into a full affairs and how many turned back and tried to work it out with your husband?

Do you have any regret leaving your husband for suppose happiness and finding out it was a wrong choice? Did you try to go back? Did your husband take you back? I just told my wife to leave. She admitted to me she have feelings toward another man. I see it developing and finally built up enough courage to confront her with it. I truly loved my wife. We are married for over 22 yrs but she said the spark is gone and she found it with another man that she talked to everyday. I could go on and on but bottom line, she care about him more than me. She is in the marriage due to scare of the unknown if she leave. She know I loved her. We have a good family structures just the spark is gone. I should be furious but am not. I wanted to leave but am also fear of the unknown. Guess my question is, to all women that left their husband, any regrets? Should I push her for a decision. She ask for space so she can think it over, am I foolish to let her? I'm so sad yet relief I spoke my mind. I'm scare to lose her but am not happy at all within the marriage and it's making everyone on the edge. What should I do? Leave now? Wait it out? I'm so confuse!!!

Why do I have this feeling that I see a divorce everytime my wife and I are in an argument. Am I being insecure? Why is my thinking so drastic? Every couple have arguments. But why I see a separation is the best solution to settle the argument? Am I beganning to set my mind for a separation? Just curious...

This question is mainly for the women. Can you have intimate sex with your husband / boyfriend yet feel nothing toward him? Am I reading too much into this? My situation is a long going ordeal and still mind boggled me. My wife and I had a rocky marriage for the past few years. Been married for more than 22 yrs. Made some life changes on my behalf to make the marriage work. I'm not saying it's all my faults but I'm making the changes for my own good. Anyway, the problems is my wife have this male friend that command her attentions more than I. I have spoken with her about it and she said it's business and he's a good friend and she knows how to handle him etc... This guy talks to her everyday. She would talk to him more than me on the phone when she is out of town. Their conversation are not intimate but very general. And this been going on for more than several years. The relationship between her and him is like a best friend type. I'm trying to not let it bother me but it does. Am I being hypercritical because her best friend is a male and it's not me? I swear he knows more about my wife daily events than me. ALmost everyday, They share their daily activities before the night is over. He would call her and I would go bonker!! The confusing message are , sex still exist in our marriage. we still talk and she tend to the marriage needs. Yet, in my opinion, her mind is not here. Her mental is elsewhere while her physical is here. All this is because of this guy calling her everyday and get her attentions even I speak out about it.

Am I overblown? Am I insecure? Am I being too sensitive? I think I'm feeling insecure but I have worked myself over it. If she wanted to leave, she is welcome to. As long as I'm doing my best in this relationship, it will be her lost. I feel secured. But this activities drive me nut and I don't know how to resolve it. I respect her rights and trust her for knowing what she is doing. Am I being too naive or too over confidence of my self?

Sticky situation here. Have a mutiny in my wfe office. The employee that take care of the IT / server is suspcte of stealing client's files to start out his new company. The problems are password to the server, his computer and other corporate machines are in his sole control. What can I do or who can I hire to decipher the veil to get access to the data base and to find out are there spywares in place or any out going files transfer? A simple keylogger? network monitoring softwares? Forensic reviews? TIA

My therapist say I think too much on everything, especially on my relationship with my wife. I admit, I am feeling very insecure with my wife. At the moment, she is on a business trip alone. Haven't called at all to let the family know she is fine or not. Our son haven't say anything but am sure wondering how is mom doing. Am I over thinking ? or is she irresponsible?

Reason why I feel this way is our marriage is very weak. And she concentrate on her business more than our relationship. I maybe jealous but I can't help it. One reason why I think this way is , IMO, She had an emotional affair with a male friend, and because of it, I feel very insecure. I confronted her and She called me crazy because she said it's all business and it's a game she playing and it is to get business done. I tried to accept it but can't. Anyway, Flirting is a tool she love to use to get an advantage to conduct her business and I feel very uncomfortable with it . Maybe flirting is not the proper terms, but over friendly is more like it. Still, it drive me nuts.

So, am I just being sensitive and in secure or am I normal? I belief in equal rights. And I wanted to trust her. But her flirtatious attitudes really driving me insane and into a bitter person. I really wanted to call it quit because her actions are making me very unhappy!! Am I over thinking this because of my insecurity?

Been asking questions about how to regain love etc...Well, this question is the opposite, how to feel or to get the loving feelings out? I think I am about to give up. I sound and feel like a quitter! But I had enough. Everything I tried seem not to work. Everything I do is not good enough or always late. Seem like the only way to regain respect and love is to have enough money on the table. Is money that important in life?

Today is a rough day. Cell phone got cut due to past due. Client bitched about slow progress on the job which I have no control over. Wife is p.o. because I don't have any money to give to her. My sub-contractor promised to show and never did. I'm facing a hugh amount of bills that I don't know how to pay. It's raining and feeling very depress. Called my wife and she replied sarcastically why I bother to call her. Overall a s**ty day. What to do?

Last week, My wife went on a business meeting that lasted till 3 o'clock in the morning. She claimed it is all business and it was among several men. She told me the meeting will be late but I didn't think it will be that late. I didn't get a call from her at all letting me know she is ok. Instead, I have to call her @ 1:30am to ck up on her. Should I be pissed?

The relationship between my wife and I is still rocky but I made a point to trust her once more and make our marriage work. She is an aggressive business person but she liked to use flirting as one of her tool. She did have several indiscreetions that IMO, was way out of line. I let her know how I feel about it and yet she have not answer to them. She admit no guilts and said "I'm just too sensative and it's all business and she know what she is doing." I went into a deep depression because of it and finally slowly coming back out of it because it's not worth it to be in a depression state! And I still love her and willing to fogive her for it and wanting to work on a happier marriage. I also don't want a broken family, we have two kid, 12 and 20.

Before I feel real insecured about her methods of doing buisness but came to conclusion that it is what it is. I still feel insecure about her being out there conducting business late yet I feel like a hyprocrite because if a man can do it,why can a women? I wanted my wife to be the best on what's she is doing. I support her 100% on all her business ventures. Yet I feel insecure because she is a women. Is it natural? Is this the price I have to pay for a agressive career minded woman? or am I being too naive and letting my wife exposed?

My marraige is very rocky at the moment. But we are still married and talking. Question I have is My spouse got invited to go to europe on some cheap airfare and will be going as a group. I don't know them at all, it's one of her client.

My problem is, Going to europe is one of my life long dream of doing it together with her and maybe on our 25th anniverssary. We are on our 22nd yr. But she choosed to do so on her own ignoring my feelings about my dream. It will give her some space and time to think things over. Granted our marriage is very shaky and maybe we wouldn't last that long. I'm still her husband. If she choosed to do so, does it mean her respect for me is not there at all?

So am I being selfish wishing her not to go because of my own dream? Should I let her have her freedom and space to think things over? Or that is not the real issue, it's the feeling of loosing my respect as a husband.

I wanted her to be happy, and letting her go will make her happy but at my expense of losing my respect. Am I caging my wife?

Been on this board for a while and asked a lot of questions about marriage. Seem like the fundamental factor of a long healthy relationship is trust and communciations. My question of the day is if the trust between both party are shattered. How long will it take to rebuild it? If you love your significant other, will love speed up the process? The leap of faith is so hard to make but if the caring and loves is still there, will it rebuild? If it's not there, is it a fruitless event? Would you rather venture into the unknown and try your luck in looking for someone or will you try to work it out with your current spouse knowing he or she is trying to make it better?