gypsywinter

in answer to another question someone included this..... handpickedfruitadoption.com. I checked it out..it is an adoption agency. Do you think this is an appropriate name for an adoption agency? Do you think that surrendered newborns/children are akin to *hand-picked fruit*? I personally think the name of this adoption agency is offensive (moreso than many others). Is this like going to an apple orchard, a strawberry field..where one 'hand-picks" their own "fruit"? What about "handpickedvegetablesadoption.com? A cabbage-patch maybe?

Just wanting to know what you think about the name of this particular adoption agency.

The natural mother who surrenders her newborn for adoption or the woman/people who adopt the newborn?

I ask because I read this in an answer to another question: ""Hopefully you had great adoptive parents. They are the true hero's here- it takes a lot to raise a child, and they chose you :)""

I have read here, in other forums, Facebook, etc., that when an expectant mother is contemplating surrendering her newborn for adoption, some people will call her 'hero' or that her surrender will be 'heroic'. Then you have the people who say the adoptive parents are the 'true hero', because after all they spent all that time and money looking for the baby they can 'choose' to love, raise and complete their family. So is it then...the expectant mother/newly delivered mother who contemplates adoption, hands over her newborn to the PAPs is only the 'hero' until she signs on the dotted line? Does signing on the dotted line of a surrender doc transferring parental rights to an agency or adoptive parents, also transfer the 'hero' status to the APs, along with parental rights?

Personally I find nothing heroic about surrendering one's newborn for the act of adoption, nor do I find anything heroic about people who only want to adopt newborn babies. Just wondering what other people think about the use of the word 'hero' in the world of adoption.

next Friday, Feb. 11?

""Super Nanny Episode – “Merrill Family” – While Marine Major Chris Merrill is stationed overseas for a year in Afghanistan, Mom Beckie, 33, is fighting another battle on the home front with their four young children. Garrett , 4 and Elena, 4, are cousins they adopted from Guatemala; Eddie, 6 and Lydia, 4, were adopted just three months ago from Ghana. Beckie tries to balance her desire for attachment with all the children with the firmness required to discipline them. Eddie and Lydia, the newest family members, grapple with frustration over still learning the English language and a great fear of the dark, since in Ghana there were real-life fears of violence at nighttime in their community."

"All the children feel free to run outside at will and ignore Mom, bedtime is fraught with turmoil, and mealtimes can be a battle zone. Compounding these challenges is the fact that Mom, at times, feels overwhelmed, outnumbered and at her limit, and very much on her own while her husband is away. Can Supernanny bring peace to this Camp Pendleton home? Find out on “Supernanny,” FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 11 (8:00-9:00 p.m., ET) on the ABC Television Network.""

or a private attorney...did you receive a detailed invoice...'lining out' each individual charge that made up say...i.e. $30,000 (or whatever you paid) to 'adopt' a newborn? Because as we all know the adoption agency or attorney pays nothing for the 'baby' from the mother...so what exactly are the individual costs that are passed on to you, that comprises the total bill (receipt) for the newborn you adopted? In all states any expectant mother who has no insurance, will be covered under Medicaid (that includes the labor & delivery, the birth of the baby), so the adoption agency or private adoption attorney should not be billing for 'hospital expenses'.

Fost to Adopt people need not answer.

from Russia and then put her 8 yr old adopted son on a plane, alone, back to Russia?

http://www.parentdish.com/2011/01/21/russians-want...

Appears that the Russian govt has filed in Tennessee for the adoptive mother to pay child support for her adopted son who is now living in a Russian orphanage, courtesy of her 'abandoning' him, alone on a plane back to Russia. The Russian govt. wants this adoptive mother to pay $2,500 a month in child support, seems her attorney believes the adoptive mother doesn't have to pay. The Russian gov't is also trying to terminate Torry Hansen's parental rights, but Torry it appears is not being cooperative. I feel she has the same obligation to pay child support for her adopted son, the same as any non-adoptive parent is required to pay by law, when the child no longer lives with the parent. Don't adoptive parents have the same legal obligation and responsibility to pay child support 'as if' the child was born to them? Torry Hansen also has not been charged with any crime...though we all know that if a bio parent had put their 8 yr old child on a plane to a destination a thousand miles away, to parts unknown and alone...that bio parent would most likely be charged with child endangerment, child abandonment, child neglect. Why is Torry not being charged with a crime?

Do you believe that Torry Hansen should be required to pay child support or not?

Do you believe that Torry Hansen should be charged with a crime or not?

was deleted? I saw nothing wrong with the question, nor in any of the answers that were given. This was a show about adoption and reunion, and surely has a place here at YA Adoption. Did the OP delete her own question?

That the high cost to buy a child from an adoption agency is justified, because of the expenses for filing fees, lawyers, etc.? Also some of these adoption agencies are also in the business of foster care...they are making a profit off the foster care placements as well.

Here is an excerpt...""For example, Faithbridge Foster Care Inc., in Alpharetta, spent $293,311 in 2008, according to the tax return it filed for that year with the Internal Revenue Service. It paid its executive director $70,325. It spent another $4,200 to rent a building the director owns (on an annual basis, the rent payments would total $16,800). It paid $40,971 to rent office space from a company belonging to the chairman of its board.

Altogether in 2008, the agency devoted almost 40 percent of its budget to its top officers.""

""A lack of industry standards and government rules enable people running such agencies to spend freely for their own benefit, said Pablo Eisenberg, a senior fellow at Georgetown University’s Center for Public and Nonprofit Leadership.

“What you’re finding is certainly the trend in nonprofits,” Eisenberg said. “An increasing number of people are pushing for a kind of free market in nonprofits.”

He described directors who don’t challenge excessive spending as “totally incompetent.”

“There’s no accountability,” Eisenberg said. “There are no guidelines by the IRS, even on self-dealing. It’s just appalling.”""

""For today’s article, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution examined federal income tax returns for most of the 336 private foster care and adoption agencies licensed in Georgia. Federal law allows public inspection of nonprofits’ tax returns. Most of those documents are available free online from organizations such as the Foundation Center (www.
foundationcenter.org) or GuideStar (www.guidestar.org).""

question in the Adoption section, scads of Pro-Lifers appear? Is there something I am missing at YA...is there an "alert" feature wherein questions that include a keyword/keywords you get an automatic 'alert'? I use the news 'alert' feature with Google with my chosen keywords...does YA offer this as well? If not...how do so many people suddenly appear when the word "Abortion" is used in a question here at YA Adoption? Just curious.

about "abortion/adoption" knew/know about "Plan B"?? If you did know about "Plan B" and had unprotected or failed protection sex..why didn't you go to your local Walgreen's or CVS to purchase over-the-counter immediately after having unprotected/failed protection sex? Or did you not have any idea that "Plan B" was available to you, if you are 18 and older, without a prescription?

""Topic: Birth Control

Question: Do I need a prescription to get the Plan B contraceptive?

Answer:In August 2006, the Food and Drug Administration approved over-the-counter (OTC) sales of the emergency contraceptive drug Plan B (two 0.75 mg levonorgestrel pills) for women age 18 years and older. Before this time, the medication was available by prescription only since 1999.

Women under age 18 still require a doctor’s prescription to obtain Plan B.

This drug is sold only in stores staffed by a licensed pharmacist. A person must show proof of age before being given the medication for purchase. (This transaction is also known as “behind the counter.”)

Levonorgestrel is a synthetic hormone that has been used in birth control pills for more than 35 years. Plan B is intended for use if regular contraception fails (such as a broken condom) or after unprotected sex. The pills—which work by stopping the release of an egg by the ovaries—should be taken by mouth as soon as possible and within 72 hours of unprotected sex or failed contraception.""

untimely pregnancies and thus decrease the amount of newborns that possibly could have been surrendered and lost to adoption? I do, do you? If not, why not? I would truly like to see contraceptives be made available to all females....at no monetary cost....FREE! I know that Birth Control is not 100% guaranteed, is still better than the alternatives...that of abstinence (what a joke) and the rhythm method.

From the Guttmacher Institute..FACT: Publicly funded contraceptive services helped prevent 860,000 unplanned births in the United States in 2006.

about Tory Hansen the adoptive mother who sent her adopted son back to Russia, alone?

Why or why not?

Seems he thinks that the age of an unaccompanied minor on a flight half way across the world, is most important. Whether the adopted Russian boy was either 7 or 8 years of age? What do you make of this video interview?

Note: Click on the video link.

http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1T4GGLL_enUS344US...

why access to OBCs became available to adoptees in Scotland in 1930?

And why access to OBCs adoption records opened in England and Wales in 1975?

How did these open access laws come into being? Was there some kind of action taken by those affected by adoption that helped to change the adoption records laws in these countries? If so, what types of actions and by whom?

I have been trying to research historically how these changes came about, but have had no success.

Any help from our UK friends on this subject would be most appreciated.

I am wondering if the surrendering mothers of today and not long ago, were furnished and/or asked for the medical and psycho-social history and/or a copy of the Homestudy, of the adoptive parents they chose to place their child with prior to the adoption finalization? If not, why not? Adoptive parents.. have any of the first mothers who chose you to adopt her child, did the nmother at anytime request this directly from you or thru the facilitators of the surrender/adoption? I would think it just as important for a surrendering mother to have the written medical and mental health histories of the adoptive parents (adoptive family) she is placing her child with, as it is important for the adoptive parents to have from the surrendering mother/parents. Would this also not help a surrendering mother to make a more informed/educated decision to place her child with the aparents she has selected? I think this would only be in regards to private and adoption agency placements. I am assuming most foster care adoptions in America, the surrendering mother is not 'placing', per se. Am just wondering. Thank you.

This is the sentence in it's entirety..""In some states, adoptees still do not have the right to their own pre-adoption birth certificate. "" I read this here... http://idahopress.newswest.com/blogs/thenextpage/?...

as I was searching for more current news reports on the "Idaho 10" and fell upon this blog wherein the blogster said the "Idaho 10" were old friends of her in another one of her writings. It appears she is also an Adult Adoptee. I am not saying I am yay or nay about this terminology...but just found it curious as this is the first time I have ever heard the original birth certificate being referred to as a "pre-adoption birth certificate". Just wanted to know what you all think, your opinions on this terminology. Those who are actively involved in access to original birth certificates (closed records), have you heard the OBC being referred to as a "pre-adoption birth certificate" before? Just wondering and am curious. Thank you...

to the Original Birth Certificate that Has Been Sealed and made *A* part of Closed Adoption Records? Now, please understand I am speaking SPECIFICALLY to the Original Birth Certificate that was created BEFORE the surrender occurred, BEFORE adoption finalization. The OBC is a separate Legal process before the separate legal process of surrender, of which surrender is a separate legal process from the separate legal process of adoption finalization. Each process has to occur separately, in order, before the next legal action takes place. The OBC is not a part of the surrender process and has nothing to do with the surrender itself. The OBC is a legal document, documenting that the birth of a certain child (or children in the case of twins, etc.) was born of it's one and only legal mother at the time of his/her's birth. The natural mother has to sign this document, she provides the information that is included in the OBC..her name (even alias), her address of residence, city and state, her birth date, whether she is married or not, how many children previously born by the mother, etc. If the father acknowledges paternity, almost the same particulars about him will be included as well, including his signature.

Why would any of the adults LISTED on the OBC, be against any of the 2 or 3 partys listed on the sealed OBC to have equal access to? Or why would any of the now adults LISTED on the OBC agree to equal access as one of the 2 or 3 partys listed on the now sealed OBC? I will say again...the OBC was created BEFORE surrender..so I am not understanding the debate whether from some first mothers or some adult adoptees, that because of the process of surrender...the original mother should be denied the factual record of her child's birth BEFORE her child was surrendered, BEFORE the finalization of adoption occurred. I apologize for sounding so repetitious with this question, but from previous answers to another question on the same type of question, it seems many people believe (confused?) that OBC/Surrender/Adoption Finalization happens in one fell swoop, as if comprised of only one legal process..it simply does not. I think I have tried as humanly possible to make myself as clear as possible about equal access (yay or nay) to the sealed OBC. Thanks for reading my question.

OK....I just read 2 questions and answers in regards to "kept" siblings and being "rejected" by older brothers that were surrendered. And I just have to ask these questions. I can understand the adoptee feelings of being unwanted and rejected, I honestly can...but this 'kept' stuff methinks needs a little clarification or further expansion on. Truly I know I would be upset if Mom had 1, 2, 3 kids already that she was raising and then gave me up somewhere in between or at the end. But for those adoptees who were the Firstborn...would you have much rather learned that your mother never had another child, remained childless, never got married, never had a life at all after your surrender? I can't speak to today...but I can speak to yesterday....unmarried mothers with babes were last on the list for any kind of help and our babies were prized. OK..baby is gone. Now that same young woman gets married..she is now MRS somebody, which those 3 letters now give her the legal right to have unlimited amounts of legal sex within the confines of marriage. Well, we all know how babies get here...people have sex and most married people do the nasty. MRS now gets pg and she is going to have this baby... What would you have had her do??

1. Get an abortion

2. Give that baby away too (guess MR wouldn't have a voice, yes/no?)

3. *Keep* the baby that is born *legitimate* in a *legitimate* marriage and now makes her a *legitimate* mother in our Great Society

4. Surrender the legit baby, get a tubal ligation ( to insure she never got pg again, no children whatsoever) and would therefore insure no "kept" children, get a divorce, never be allowed to marry

I know I probably sound a bit snarky...that's just me, I really mean no harm, nor offense...but I would really like to know what surrendered Firstborns have wished, not wished, expected or not expected of their nmothers lives After surrender. I am not speaking to 'apprehension' types of adoptions, but rather the supposed 'voluntary' type thru an agency, when a newborn.

Thank you and I am listening.

was reported and deleted?? I did not give a rant, I gave a list of mass media articles that did not contain any links. The captioned news articles were all related/relevant to the question both positively and not so positive. There was no promotion of any specific website nor blog. I did not ETA any answer with an opinion/response of my own to any individual, in fact I responded to no one. I made no disparaging/insulting/offensive remarks to any one individual person or as a group. SO! what to you believe was wrong about posing a question about Haitian Adoptions, without any further detail/response/remarks from me, and how would a person find it violating YA TOS? Truly I would like to know. Thank you!

Globe and Mail

Now is not the time for Haitian adoptions, says agency

Globe and Mail

19, 2010 11:32AM EST A national organization representing adoption agencies is warning Canadians against trying to adopt Haitian children who have been ...

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Valley Adoption agency flooded with calls for Haiti orphans

ABC15.com (KNXV-TV)

SURPRISE, AZ -- A local adoption agency is getting flooded with calls from people looking to adopt Haitian orphans. Building Arizona Families in Surprise ...

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Schools, shelters get ready -- in case

MiamiHerald.com

Our Kids, Miami-Dade County's private foster care and adoption agency, has alerted DCF to its interest in helping children orphaned by the quake. ...

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Top federal official will visit Miami to help groups handling TPS filings

MiamiHerald.com

Also eligible will be children previously identified by an adoption agency as eligible for adoption and who have been ``matched'' to prospective adoptive ...

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The hows and whys of adoption

Indian Express

Adoption is the manner in which a person or a couple can adopt a child who is an orphan and is in the care of the state agencies. ...

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Frederick News Post (subscription)

Earthquake increases adoption urgency for Frederick couple

Frederick News Post (subscription)

A statement posted on the US State Department's website Friday afternoon said the department was working with other agencies to identify options for ...

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Adoption process literally buried under rubble

Abbotsford News

Lorne Welwood, executive director of Hope Adoption Services in Abbotsford, said families the agency works with are frantic. “We're being besieged by calls ...

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Holding breath on Haiti adoption

Sioux Falls Argus Leader

Marc Andreas, vice president of marketing for Bethany Christian Services, said his agency, which has an office in Sioux Falls, fielded 300 additional ...

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Earthquake raises urgency for couple from Ozark to finish Haiti adoption

KY3

An international adoption agency is urging people to contact their local congressional representatives to get these children to their adoptive families as ...

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KYW1060.com

Expert Says New Haitian Adoptions Are Now On Hold

KYW1060.com

based private adoption agency licensed in this area. He says the Haitian orphans flown to Pittsburgh by Governor Rendell were 53 of several hundred orphans ...

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I am not understanding this...foster mothers calling the mother of their fostered child..."birthmother". The mother has not surrendered her parental rights nor has she been TPR'd. The foster mother/parents are just that...Foster. Their foster child still has his/her own legal mother/parents...why are they being called "birth" anything? From what I understand in fostercare, supposedly reunification with the mother/father is the primary goal, if feasible. Why would they be called "birthmother/father/parents"? Why do some foster mothers insist on calling the mother/father of the child they are fostering, "Birth"?? Until parental rights are surrendered, or TPR'd, or the adoption finalization... the natural mother/father is just that...the one and only legal mother/father of her/his child. I was reading at this place...

http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php...

As much as I disagree with the birth thingy stuff...still I am not understanding how a mother/father who still have parental rights to their child, can be called "birth". Anyone care to explain to me? I guess anyone who has a baby nowadays, even in marriage, can be called a "birth" something, would that be true?

if they are found to be addicted to drugs and/or alcohol? I noticed on another question that many thought that addiction should be grounds for immediate removal from the natural mother. What about natural parents that are married, single or divorced or adoptive parents who are married, single or divorced who are abusing drugs and/or alcohol...shouldn't their children (any age) also be immediately removed from the parents as well? Is there a difference in regards as to who is addicted and who gets to keep their kids or not? If so, why or why not? Personally I think alcoholics are just as damaging to their children as any drug addict...it's still substance abuse. Should all alcoholics/heavy drinkers lose their children as well to fostercare, should the occasional pot-smoker lose his/her parental rights as well? Should only absolute non-drinkers (of the alcohol variety to include beer), no drug use of any kind people, be allowed to parent? Who determines who is engaging in total drug addiction vs occasional use or the died-in-the wool alcoholic vs the social drinker? Is there a double standard for substance abuse for women vs men, i.e. the married husband is the alcoholic/addict, should his children be removed from his household? At what point do people believe that alcoholism/drug abuse is damaging to the children who live in these households...do we hold different levels of acceptability based on marital status, economic status, home owner or renter?