What is your take on this??? Husband thinks I should cook every night and is ticked off when I don't!!!?

You are ABSOLUTLEY right!!! I live your life as well. I stay home with three kidsand do all the ,washing, drying, folding, and putting away all the laundry,sweeping, mopping, vacuuming, dishes, dusting, making beds, cleaning bathrooms, cleaning counters, picking up toys, tidying everything, putting kids to bed, brushing teeth and hair, baths and showers, read bedtime stories, running around, shopping, paying bills and finances, and cooking. So yes some days I want a break, don't have time to make something, or forgot to take it out. My husband USED TO be a jerk about it until I stopped cooking for him all together. I made just enough food for me and the kids. After a couple of nights and a big blow out about his not wanting to participate in raising a family together he started helping out more, and even cooking dinner once in a while. He goes to work and deals with 1/4 of the things us stay-at-home moms deal with on a daily basis. How many times a day does your husband, on top of his usual duties, have to clean up puke? I had to stop cleaning to do just that today from my three year old. So the next time he wants to pull some attitude about dinner, remind him how so much more difficult your UNPAID job is.

Wow.It would make me a little mad too if I were you.I don;t have any kids just yet,I am 31 weeks pregnant & I do cook most nights,but occasionally I just feel so tired & he doesnt say anything like that.Usually he will make himself a sandwich or get get takeout.He used to be pretty bad about it though.We both worked (at the same place) 40 hours a week.When we got off work,I was expected to still do it all.After a while of some things just not getting done,we ha d atalk about it & he has done so much better since.Even now that I am not working,he still doesn't act like he used to..I agree with some of these other answerers.Quit cooking for him for a while if he is going to be that way about it.Just cook for you & the kids.Let him fend for himself.I bet it will help.I really hate it for you that he is this way though.I can't imagine if my marriage was like that.Good luck sweetie!!Maybe it'll get better..

EDIT-and sonny,Raising kids is a 24 hours a day 7 days a week job where his job is NOT..The child belongs to BOTH parents.So BOTH parents should work together in raising the kids.I see nothing wrong with a man getting up and helping his wife cook sometimes or clean or deal with the kids.It is his family too.Why shouldn't he?..This isn't the 50's you know..

A relationship should be about working together and appreciating each other. If you've been busy all day, then he should appreciate that you might like dinner cooked or get a take away because it would be easier for both of you.

Could you sit him down and have a chat with him and explain how what he does and says makes you feel and although you understand that he doesn't want to come home and cook either, you need to work together as a team instead of against each other.

you both work all day you at home him in his job ask him to do a role reversal maybe he will see how hard it is failing that get gone for a few days leave him to it he may just learn to appreciate the fact that your there at the end of the day then his dinner might not seem like such a big deal? he must have been waited on hand and foot by his own mother. Tell him if thats what he wants is a mother then maybe he should move back home. . I doubt when you met thats all he had in mind was a "cook mother to his children and a cleaner" tell him maybe he would like to cook you a nice meal for a change.

I have 4 children, run my own buisness, cook every night except the weekend, clean, do laundry, grocery shop, help the kids with homework, take them to school, pick them up from school and everything else! And I am divorced doing it alone!!!!!!

Cooking is not hard, even if you make something simple..he works all day and you stay home with one child and dont work..Cook something!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If that is pointed to me I also have a 9 year old son with autism! Ignorant, no I dont think so. Devoted to my children YES! When I was married even if I was in a rush I would open a can of stew and have french bread or something! My husband would fix his own plate but I would make sure that after 10 hours at work he did come home to have something waiting for him to eat even if I had to pick something up, he deserved that much after providing for his family! It only takes a few seconds to open a can! So the one who is ugly inside is you! Lazy, perhaps as well......If you dont like some of the answers you get dont post okay! Everyone sees things different and has different standards...But to say cant cook or dont have time, seriously how much time to open a can?????

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It doesn't really matter what we think, what matters is what you and your husband think. He works outside the home, you work in the home. He obviously feels like making dinner is part of your "job" just as typing reports or whatever it is he does is part of his. When you don't do your job he gets upset. Since you two have a difference of option of what your home responsibilities are you need to sit down and discuss them.

Good Luck and God Bless

is OK cheer up,he only ticked off a little. Life mustn't stop here it must go on. From what I gather in ur MSG u are a sweet loving wife & u take good care of ur family is just a one off issue.... So things can't go out of hand,keep on with the good thing u're doing & u surely will reap what u've sown

That is not right. I don't know completely how it feels but I can imagine. Not everyone has the time to cook every night. If he's really that bothered about cooking him self get him to buy himself a pizza with his "hard earned" money. Anyways tell him that you think he underestimates how much work you do and that you'd appreciate if he let you off the hook a bit. Best of luck

Yes, you should be mad that he automatically expects this. On nights that you can't make dinner, why can't he just pick up dinner for the family??? He can also help you with dinner sometimes. I do think that since you are home during the day, that you can make dinner- on most nights. How about trying those 30 minute dinners, nothing crazy- I'm sure he just wants something/anything after working all day.