Getting my cats to be pals again!?

Question

About 2 months ago we adopted a 5 year old female and once she was introduced to our 5 year old male the two got along like life-long pals! Recently (last two weeks) she has gotten comfortable with us and the house and has started becoming very affectionate and playful with us and this has brought about a big change in our male! He has suddenly taken a dislike to her! It seems like he has become jealous of her, if she jumps up onto the bed with us he puffs himself up, ears go back and he tries to bat at her. She is smaller than him and tends to take a submissive position. I have even seen him try to mount her, despite the fact that they are both altered. We have also heard her growling at him when he gets too bossy and he chases her around the house. I think its all a dominance/jealousy thing, but I want to know if they'll be pals again!? Has anyone had this experience? And any tips on helping them to get along?

Update:

They don't fight all the time thankfully. It tends to be peaceful for the most part, they'll even watch the birds out the window together! Its just when she wants to hang out with me...then he tends to get super grumpy!

Claire Doll · Accepted Answer

Hi Nicki,
Next month it will be a year since I introduced my new 3 y/o male cat to my senior male cat (age 10), and they are just starting to get along.  However, just when I think things are harmonious here at home, the senior cat constantly chases the younger cat, who is a little monkey/acrobat and jumps up on the furniture to get away from the the older one.  I have come home from work and they will be together by the back door waiting for me to come in; or after church I will find them both on my bed sleeping close together in the same place where they were before.  I think my older cat wants to remind the young one that HE owns me/my house.  Meanwhile, the young one growls at him, like your female growls.  :)  I have high hopes for your two, try to think of it as they're siblings - if you had siblings growing up, remember how you had fights with them?  What your cats are doing right now is simply communicating with each other, and it's quite natural.  Have fun, and enjoy them!  (And for goodness sake, don't play with the new one without inviting the old one to play too - assure him of his "place".)  Good luck!

Mil · Answer

Are they always fighting now?

I've had a male and female of similar age do the same things, though she was the one grabbing him around the neck and slamming him to the floor.  The occasional attempt to mate did occur too, despite them being fixed.

You might try some rescue remedy on them to calm them down.  But it sounds like he is trying to make sure he stays top cat.  I hope it doesn't escalate.  If it starts to, you're going to have to break out the water bottle.  And tossing flip flop into the mix tends to end the squabble, but not resolve the problem.  If neither of those help, a high range beep remote would separate them most times.  It's high enough that humans can't hear it, but it will distract the cats, big time.

You're doing good to try and figure this out early.

Good luck!

Edit: yeah, it sounds like he's a jealous boy.  I'd try to set aside time for just him.  Like 15 minutes twice a day of pets or play that your girl cat isn't involved in.   They sound cute, if rambunctious, lol.

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Getting my cats to be pals again!?

2 Answers