How do parents ever get over the death of a child?

They will never "get over it". That is the worst thing in the world to loose a child! You should just be there for them, bring them a meal, listen to them, clean their kitchen or do their laundry. I think that is about all you can do for someone in this horrible situation. Don't ask just do! People rarely ask for help, so just bring them a warm meal or something. Always give them a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on, and let them talk about the sweet child they lost. Good Luck!

The mother of my niece, hasn't been able to get over the death of her two newborns, one died 3 weeks after birth and the other only a few days after birth, the first one died just over a year ago and the second about 6 months ago. Holidays are very hard for her and her husband, but now that they have found out that the babies would not have died if her doctor had given her a shot of RhoGAM I am sure it will be so much harder for them to get through the holidays.

Honestly I don't think there are any words to say to ease the pain, just be there for them, let them cry on your shoulder, and cry with them, in time the pain will lessen, I don't think that is anything that ever goes away or that anyone ever gets over the loss of a child.

The death of a child of any age is tragic to any parent.

I do not believe as a parent or friend, you ever get over it. You live with this the rest of your life. Yes the pain is horrendous.

It is even harder if the child was a twin, as you remember ever time the surviving twin has a birthday. Christmas is one of the times the pain is usually very horrendous.

Many families set up a foundation in the child"s name. The foundation is usually set up to help children that need different kinds of help. In Canada a beautiful boy was killed from a fall from a tree. He had climbed the tree trying to locate his way home. This was on the Canadian Thanksgiving day. He was also a twin. The family has set up a foundation in his name ( Brandon Crisp )which is connected to the Canadian Tire Jump Start program. This foundation is set up to help underprivileged children who cannot afford the cost of playing minor sports. Canadian Tire accepts donations in Brandon Crisps name. This is one way that the death of a child can become something that helps other children and gives the parents some peace and comfort knowing this.

( Connie Mom of 4 and 5th. Grade Teacher )

My boyfriend's adopted son, i was known as his mother since he was 4 months, just passed away 2 months ago from a failed heart surgery. We both still cry almost every day. I come on here as an escape from the "real" world and just try to help people with their kids because it makes me feel good but i still find myself writing in the present tense when i talk about my son, when i realize it the tears just start.

It's the most awful feeling to loose a child. Someone you've put your heart and soul into, it's one of the biggest hurts. Everytime i think about him it feels like my heart is just being ripped out over and over again.

My boyfriend and i had a really hard time with it at first, we were in shock and we were both numb and then it set it an it was constant crying...we couldn't do anything but lay in bed and cry. After a couple weeks we realized that our son was no longer in any pain and were were happy about that, that he could be put to rest and not hurt anymore.

As christmas gets closer, it's bearing down on us again and the shock and numbness is coming back. We can't believe our son won't be here for his second christmas with us. We're trying our hardest to stay strong, being there for each other and having each others shoulders to lean on when we need to, that's what's getting us through.

There's not much you can do for these people because they're going to hurt unbelievably bad. Just be there should they need a friend to talk to, that's all you can do.

well I've had 3 cousins die (2 different aunts children) and they both say they will never get over it and especially the first Holiday Season is always the worse but they just try to cope.... It's hard for our whole family around this time and especially to see them this way but all u can do is be there for them supporting them... There's no pain like losing a child they say so just be there for them it's really all u can do

A parent will NEVER get over a loss the only thing they can do is move on from it.......Their is really nothing you can say except be there to listen if they want to talk about it and if they dont be there to talk about something else....Just do what you can to help them through this time and offer condolences if they do bring it up...Be sure to point out, how tough they have been through it and how great it is that they keep remembering there child!! Good luck

EDIT also something you can do for them that they wont even see is PRAY!! Pray that they can move on with there lives and pray God can comfort them during the toughest times ever!!

I don't think you ever really do get over losing a child, particularly during occasions such as Christmas thier birthdays and any other special occasion, the heartache will be there, BUT it will lessen when they are able to remember that child with a smile, just be there for them, tell them that they are not alone, although they may feel alone at this moment in time.

No one ever "gets over" it. You learn coping skills, and look for positive things in life.

I'd recommend a support groups with people who've been through the same experience. Often times, hospice groups have people involved with stuff like that, and any mental health facility or pregnancy resource center should have groups available.

Go on with life with them. Invite them to a party. Bring them some mistletoe, and insist they kiss. Little breaks with some laughs help anyone. Laughing can reduce blood pressure, and help the chemicals in the body from feeling grief so much.

I wouldn't bring up their loss, but if they mention it, or want to do something to honor their child's grief, then honor the child. Good luck!

It gets better as time goes by. But occasionally you still have a sad moment. You remember the birthday and the day they died. We lost a newborn girl years ago. And occasionally we still think about what happened. We were fortunate in two ways at the time. The hospital in our town actually had a support group for people who were in the same situation, It helped allot. And we also had two boys. Having to take care of them helped allot too.

There is no way i think i would ever be able to get over that. It is hard to find the right words to say and its next to impossible to find any words that could make them feel better. All you can do is let them know that you are always there for them during the holidays they will need plenty of support and people around them but they will also need time to themselves to greive. Although we want them to be happy again, they need to greive first.