19 year old single dad. I don't think I can do this, any advice? PLEASE HELP!?

Every parent wonders if they are good enough. As far as giving him things, kids don't need a lot of material things. You're giving his the greatest gift by attending college so you can get a good job and support him the way you want in the future.

As far as Nana goes...take her advice with a grain of salt. I'm sure she thinks she's helping you by criticizing the way you are parenting, but everyone has their opinions. You are doing the best that you can in your situation. You had no idea that your son was allergic to carrots, but now you do. You did the right thing by taking him to the E.R. Having a child is emotionally and physically draining regardless of what age you are. The fact that you are so young and doing this all on your own is amazing.

I wouldn't put Sammy up for adoption. You obviously love your son, and you seem to be a great father. Keep doing what you're doing and try to find other people to help you with Sammy. Before you know it he will be in school and you won't have to worry about Nana and her ways.

The first thing you need to do is find a new sitter. If "Nana" cared about you or your son she would helping you .

Believe me when I say at points all good parents doubt themselves. Especially single parents because our load is twice as heavy. Your son does not need a house full of toys. In fact toddlers play the best with simple cheap things. Google DIY baby toys from some ideas.

I'm assuming that was your son's first time having carrots. If that's true you would have had no idea he was allergic. That doesn't mean that you were irresponsible.

People for some reason always think it is okay to give other people advice on how to raise their children. I am on my 5th child and I still have perfect strangers telling me what THEY think I am doing wrong. My advice to you is to listen, evaluate whether it is important and do what you feel is right in your heart.

You are doing all the right things (college to get a better life etc). Don't give up. By the time your son is old enough to remember things can be easier.

You have been given an awesome gift in Sammy and you sound smart enough to realize it. I want you to call Child services but not to turn the child in but rather ask for help. There are programs that help with daycare, healthcare and possible food and clothing.

You can find a parents morning out near by and allow Nana a small break. these are usually half what day care costs. You maybe eligible for finanical aide for school as a single parent. You have to do what is best for your long term and for the child's well being. You obviously care greatly for Sammy and that will carry you along way. You can be a great dad, do not allow any one to tell you otherwise.

.

There may also be some support groups in your area through either a church or government agency geared towards single dads. these can provide advice on services available or just moral support

I will keep you in my prayers, but I do believe you can do this for Sammy. I am not sure what your religous beliefs are, but I believe if God has blessed you with a child then he intended for you to be the dad. If this is his intent then I believe he will equip you to take on the necessary task. Ask your self has he failed to provide you shelter, clothing or food, if not why would he start now, You can do this. You Love Sammy and it shows.

For 19 you seem very mature. You seem driven and you love Sammy. please remember That being a father is your real job and everything else just pays the bills. College may take an extended period of time for you but can do that as well. I want to encourage you you can do this .

I am a father separated from his children. I am currently writing a book for Separated fathers to be able over come the ideas in our head that keep us from being great dads. I am also trying my hand at afew articles like http://voices.yahoo.com/3-tips-separated-fathers-1...

It is hard being a parent.

It is especially hard being a parent with your mum.

It sounds like your mother has basically taken on the mother role to your son. As hard as it is it is quite normal for kids to get very attached to female figures in their life. As they get older they tend to grow out of this favouritism. My son (1) gets really excited to see me and my mother in law, but is a lot less happy about seeing his father (who is a wonderful father by the way) and does not really like my father in law much. It is a stage and they grow out of it.

I don't think you should give him away. He is 1 and a little person now. He is attached to both you and your mother. It would be quite traumatic for him to go to new people.

I agree that your mum seems overly judgemental. Sounds like she is very overprotective and does not think about your feelings very much. You are right, being allergic to carrots is exceptionally rare. The only advice i can think of that might help is to take a parenting course. You sound like a very good father, but not too confident in your skills. By taking a course it may give you the confidence to be able to say to her 'i know what i am doing' or if you are feeling really brave 'actually just because i do this a different way to you does not mean it is wrong.

The first year is a really good time. Baby basically becomes a little person. In the last 2 months my son has learnt to walk, speak about 15 words, operate an ipad, sleep through the night, drink from a cup, and although he is still a lot of work he is a lot more fun. I think that when you are able day care sounds like a great idea. You could also go to the community center and see if there are any playgroups you guys could attend.

Single Dad Advice

Of course! Do not sweat it. There are a lot of open-minds out there in this world. Don't think that by any means this is a drawback, if anything you look more mature than most 19 year olds. Things happen and you know it will be right for you when you meet someone that does not judge you and completely understands your circumstances.

DO NOT abandon your baby. There are tons of single parents out there. If they can do it then so can you. You got this. Get rid of nana. She is a bad influence. Just find someone else or look into a day care. That's crazy about the carrots thing, I started feeding my baby carrots at four months!

I don't think you should be around Nana anymore. Get someone else who can look after your baby. All she seems to be doing is putting you down, and I think she's the whole reason you felt so awful about your life. Not to mention, she told you not to let your gay friend touch your baby? That's really judgmental, and I really think you should stop listening to her BS. Don't give your baby up, you sounds like a wonderful father. Don't worry about his allergy, you didn't know. it's not your fault.

Your an amazing dad. You may not be able to give him everything he wants, but your giving him everything he needs, at such a young age its hard to leave a child to go to work but its what you have to do to give your child what he needs.

Don't give up collage, you obvouisly love your child to pieces.

Ok he may have a better bond with Nana but he spends more time with her, its not because your doing anything wrong or because she is a better parent then you, its just that he is around her more so I wouldn't worry about it and most kids don't delvelop that 'shes fat shes ugly...gay etc' untill they reach 2nd school (I think ur in the U.s so basicly like age 12+) So I wouldnt worry about that just yet.

Bare in mind, thier is nothing worse for a child then feeling unwanted. If you give your child away he might get toys ...etc...but he will always wonder why he was given away and why he wasnt wanted. He needs his Dad. Not strangers.

I think that you should keep the baby because you are its real father and it needs someone to look up to. also tell nana to shut up! Carrots! How could you know! Its not youre fault you didnt know! you need to go to c ollege and get a better job to make youre baby happy when he is older. Anmd get a new babysitter. I reallyy hoped this helped but whatever you do dont give him up for adoption please. You care about the baby and its youres you should keep it