Why can't my husband make an effort to like my family?

It sounds like both of you have toxic and difficult family dynamics and you'd benefit of couples therapy.

Sticking to your family of origin out of loyalty because "that's what families do" is sick and stupiid, especially if doing so just brings more problems and drama to your life.

Right now, this is an issue w your husband. You two need an outsider's perspective to see what do to.

cause he dont want to like them

I think you need to start with acknowledging this "event" that took place that obviously had a major impact on your husband. Do you support him when you are around family? What was your response to the "event"? Was your family in the wrong? Did you call them out and let them know that you and your husband are a team? It sounds like you are getting into a childish game of "well if you won't, I won't", which is not going to help anyone. How about sitting down and talking about when it's important for you to have him with you at your family's house and when it's important for him to have you at his family's house? Maybe on holidays or every other Saturday or something you plan to both go to family's homes... if you decide to visit family on other days, you go yourself. It's okay to not do the same things all the time, give yourselves permission to do that. Stay away from your opinions of his family and his opinions of your family. Maybe you just approach it as, "This is important to me and it seems to be important to you so let's talk about when we can stand to be around our families together. Can we both visit my parents on every second Saturday of the month and visit your parents are the fourth Saturday?"

This is about expectations and the resulting guilt when you don't do what you think you're 'supposed' to do.  And the same is true for him.

The reality is you both don't like each other's families and you both barely like your own.  The simple solution is he doesn't go to your family events and you don't go to his.  And if the families have issues with that, it's theirs to sort through.

so you're all about disliking other people? Good luck with all that.

Life is about accepting people at face value and just living our lives when we aren't around them. So if you want to cause a bunch of stress between you and your husband, then keep on being resentful and stupid.

I wasn't that fond of my in-laws but my husband never knew. They were complete morons. But i was respectful, spent time with them on holidays and other get-together and whatever! ..... because my husband loved his parents, faults and all. I wasn't going to sit there insulting them and criticizing and judging them. They were different from me, but everyone is.

Grow theFuck up

There's a question you haven't properly addressed in your post. You stated,

"But due to an event that happened my husband refuses to go anywhere with my family until they apologize to him."

WHAT was that event? WHAT happened to have offended your husband so greatly that he requires an appology?? And if your family offended your husband so badly, WHY ARE YOU NOT STANDING BY HIM ??? Do you not see that you are intentionally permitting your family disrespect your husband?

I think you need to review the circumstances. Lots of married people dislike their in-laws, but they don't let their in-laws interfere. Remember to leave all in-laws "outside" your marriage.

I tend not to believe anonymous posters. They are sad lying fantasists