kayjay

I need an example of how to display the squares of the numbers 1 - 10 to the console output window. I can't find any information to assist me. Newbie to the world of programming.

For the past 8 years, unemployment it as an all time high, the housing market has dropped, education programs cut, pensions have been frozen or lost, health care has become unaffordable, and gas prices are hurting the average American.

Although these problems do not affect everyone, there are people who are struggling to survive. There is the mentality that if it doesn't affect me I don't care. Please refrain from insults.

I read it on my home Yahoo page under the Onion News, but haven't seen it on CNN or Nightline. Did anyone else read or hear this. It said that he was shot in the face three times at a restaurant in Greenwich Village.

When I turn my computer on it has begun to make a buzzing noise that last until after bootup. I thought it was one of my CPU fans or my disk drive. I tested the drive and it was fine. I changed the CPU fans to find this was not the problem. Can someone lead me in the right direction. Thanks.

Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out. Both were very faithful

and loving wives, however, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi

Breezers. Incredibly drunk and walking home they needed to pee, so they

stopped in the cemetery. One of them had nothing to wipe with so she

thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend however

was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin

them.She was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a

ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that. After the girls did

their business they proceeded to go home.

The next day one of the women's husbands was concerned that his normally

sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other

husband and said, "These girl nights have got to stop! I'm starting to

suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties!!"

"That's nothing" said the other husband, "Mine came back with a card stuck

to her a** that said..... 'From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll

never forget you.'

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a

voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of

Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later

huffing and puffing, he finally gives up.

The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing

happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he

has Lost 10 lbs. as promised..

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most

stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is

wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her

neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me".

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent

shape and it takes him a while before he can continue, so for the

next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in

better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover

that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50

pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is

our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this

good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he

finds Richard Simmons standing there wearing nothing but pink running

shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine

This is for all the Italians out there, and those who are lucky enough

>to be married to an Italian, and even to all the friends of Italians.

>

>An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies

>of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite Italian

>anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs. Gathering his remaining

>strength, he lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he

>slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort,

>gripping the railing with both hands he crawled downstairs.

>With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the

>kitchen. Were if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself

>already in heaven. For there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen

>table were literally hundreds of his favorite anisette

>sprinkled cookies.

>

>Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted

>Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a

>happy man?

>Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table,

>landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the

>wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seemingly

>bringing him back to life. The aged and withered hand trembled on its way

>to a

>cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a

>spatula by

>his wife.

>

>"Get outta here! " she shouted , "They're for the funeral!"

I've been searching the net so long my eyes hurt. The song sorta goes:

Oh! I aint going to let it get the best of me baby.

Going to go somewhere and and cool.

This is not how my head suppose to be baby.

Got me acting like a silly fool.

I say anger,

detroys you soul

That's all I can remember. I know the song is talking about anger and how it hurts your soul.

I used to sign on and stay on for hours. I couldn't stay away. Now I just pop in every once in a while.

What's a 710?

Yesterday I was having some work done at the car dealer.

A blonde woman came in and asked for a seven-hu ndred-ten.

They all looked at each other, and one of the mechanics asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"

& lt; / FONT>

She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine. I lost it and need a new one. It had always been there."

The mechanic gave the woman a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw w hat the p iece looked like.

She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710.

He then took her over to another car which had the hood up and asked, "Is there a 710 on this car?"

She pointed and said, "Of course, it's right there."

Click here to learn the identity of the mysterious 710:

>http://mademelaugh.com/gfx/710.jpg

The answer really is there.

Making a Baby

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use

a

surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father

was to

arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off

now the

man should be here soon."

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer

happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.

Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to...''

Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been

expecting you."

"Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you

know babies are my specialty?"

"Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and

have a

seat"

After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"

"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the ba thtub, one on

the

couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room

floor is fun. You can really spread out there."

"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry

and

me!"

"Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if

we

try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven

angles, I'm

sure you'll be pleased with the results."

"My, that's a lot!" gasped Mrs. Smith.

"Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be

in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with

that."

"Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of

his

baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus," he said.

"Oh my " Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

"And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider

their mother was so difficult to work with."

"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.

"Yes, I'm afraid so I finally had to take her to the park to get

the job

done right.

People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good

look"

"Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

"Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours, too.

The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly

concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.

Finally,

when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to

pack it

all in."

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your,

uh...equipment?"

"It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod

and we can get to work right away."

"Tripod?"

"Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much

too big to be held in the hand very long."

Mrs. Smith fainted

I think it's awesome. Hard to put down.

GOODNIGHT TO MOM

(You don't have to own a cat to get a hoot out of this guy's story!)

We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We

turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our

pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. We phoned the local cab

company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the

front door to leave the house.

The cat we put out in the yard, scoots back into the house. We didn't

want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird.

My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat

runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, my wife (who

doesn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night) explains

to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, "He's just going upstairs to say

goodbye to my mother."

A few minutes later, I get into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," I said, as

we drove away. "That stupid ***** was hiding under the bed. I had to

poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off,

so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to

keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ***

Downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!"

The cab driver hit a parked car...

A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes :

"USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!"

She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the following week she enclosed another note:

"USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!"

The laundryman became very annoyed, and when her clean laundry was delivered, it contained a note from him:

"I USE PLENTY SOAP ON PANTIES!!! USE MORE PAPER ON A $ $.

I was watching the Lopez HBO special and he kept using the word puto? Not sure if it's spelled correctly. It sounded funny the way he used it. But I bet it's bad.

... can we give the racism a rest. Does anyone else get tired of this? No one really knows the answer as to why one race does what. What is the point? Does anyone have any interesting questions that would actually take some brain power? Or something funny that happened to them. Show some compassion regardless of what you believe here tonight. I dare you.

Why is that all the people on Yahoo who bash other races and beliefs don't allow IM's or emails?

BIKERS REQUEST

>

> A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky

> clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said,'Because

> you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one

> wish.'

>

> The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can

> ride over anytime I want.' The Lord said, 'Your request is

> materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of

> undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the

> Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust

> several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to

> justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and

> think of something that could possibly help mankind.'

>

> The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, 'Lord, I

> wish that I and all men could understand our wives. I want to know how

> she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent

> treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's

> wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.'

>

> The Lord replied, 'Did you want two lanes or four on that bridge.'

How was I born?

A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"

The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!

Your Mum and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.

Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mum and we met at a cyber-cafe.

We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download

from my hard drive.

As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us

had used a firewall,

and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a

little

Pop-Up appeared that said:

You got Male!

Today on CNN they said that on the border of Arizona, the Coast Guard is set up to watch for illegal aliens. But, if these people are armed, that they should not engage and let them come across. The Coast Guard should infact call the Border Patrol. What sense does this make? They could be drug smugglers, terrioist, etc. What are your thoughts. I hope someone else saw this today.