mandy lynn

Your Open Question: My fiancé gets loud and mean in my room. I ask him to go out and he takes at least minutes to gather stuff.?

I tell him he needs to get out now because I'm getting angry. He stays and yells more, or he quietly stays and starts gathering his things. It's been 4 years of this. He knows I just need him out of my room when I ask and that I'll start saying angry things back at him if he stays in the room picking on me-pushing buttons- trapping me.

He tells me I'm abusive when after I've been asking and waiting I tell him to 'get the f*** out of my room!' or tell him he needs to leave the room NOW when I ask him. His arguments are circular conversations with himself. A bunch of accusations which have been refuted tens of times before. Accusations of lies when the reason he knows these 'lies' is because I did NOT lie. Etc. Never once has a question been answered by him. He accuses me of lying and cheating when ironically he is the one who lies and has cheated.

Can anyone explain to me what's happening here exactly?

Btw- he says I can't expect him to leave without his computer packed and his shoes on and a change of clothes.. That that's abusive of me to ask of him. All while I'm curled up in my bed with my blankets telling him to go out and that he's hurting me right now. Etc...

I tell him he needs to get out now because I'm getting angry. He stays and yells more, or he quietly stays and starts gathering his things. It's been 4 years of this. He knows I just need him out of my room when I ask and that I'll start saying angry things back at him if he stays in the room picking on me-pushing buttons- trapping me.

He tells me I'm abusive when after I've been asking and waiting I tell him to 'get the f*** out of my room!' or tell him he needs to leave the room NOW when I ask him. His arguments are circular conversations with himself. A bunch of accusations which have been refuted tens of times before. Accusations of lies when the reason he knows these 'lies' is because I did NOT lie. Etc. Never once has a question been answered by him. He accuses me of lying and cheating when ironically he is the one who lies and has cheated.

Can anyone explain to me what's happening here exactly?

Btw- he says I can't expect him to leave without his computer packed and his shoes on and a change of clothes.. That that's abusive of me to ask of him. All while I'm curled up in my bed with my blankets telling him to go out and that he's hurting me right now. Etc...

I have anxiety and major depressive disorder. I am fairly certain my meds aren't working as well as my old meds.

That said, I could use the input of a group. I have anxiety that stems from the thought that my life has become unusually complicated. I can't seem to tackle the tasks quickly enough and as I fall behind the aftermath sets in.

I'll make a list of the things going on.

1. Divorced 3 years ago from an abusive man. He has an attorney and they file papers with the court about 3 times a year to which I can't reply adequately because I can't afford an attorney. He's almost $20,000 behind on child support and now, because of my inability to keep up with his paperwork, I've been ordered to pay his attorneys fees. (aftermath of not keeping up)

2. I have 3 sons still home. 2 of them are ADHD. One also has Asperger's. The other also has Tourette's and is bipolar.

3. I have a pituitary macroadenoma. It's a tumor that is not cancerous but effects all of my body. Care of the tumor is complicated as it causes numerous problems with endocrine systems and also requires neuro ophthalmology appointments 3 times per year.

4. About 2 years ago my kids and I had a terrible experience with the government and a local business wrongfully entering our home and taking everything of value that we had after my divorce. Something went wrong in the court records and I was reassigned a paid debt and was denied my civil rights by being refused a hearing to prove it was paid. The debt they reassigned was under $300. I was not given the option of paying it. They got a judgement without serving me and at the sheriff's sale, unlawfully entered my home and took over $8000 worth of my tools of the trade and my children's belongings. I've been blessed to have a pro bono attorney fighting for my rights. It's been in court for 2 years now and it keeps getting moved, continued, and manipulated.

Unusual stressors? Recommendations?

My daughter, age 20 has a young man whom she really likes. I'll call him Scott. He is away on a mission for church. This young man's friend, I'll call him John, likes my daughter a lot. He just got home from his mission for church. Scott will be home in April. Both Scott and John are aware that they both like the same young lady, and it hasn't caused much problem at all.

However, John's mother who works with Scotts mom, texted my daughter telling her that Scott's mom is always talking badly about my daughter and the rest of our family. That Scott's mom hopes that Scott will lose interest quickly as soon as he's home and that the only reason she's nice to us is so Scott will complete his mission, etc.

My daughter called me sort of upset yesterday about the drama John's mom keeps trying to cause.

I advised her to block her number. She's hesitant because she knows John will have to deal with her wrath and it will just be another thing for her to gab about to all the ladies at work and in town.

I don't know what to do but I really want her to stop. All other things aside, I'm paying for her cell phone and I feel like I should be able to block her discreetly so she doesn't throw a fit and make things worse.

We live about 600 miles away from them but my daughter has a lot of friends there and has a job starting in February there. She's a big girl and she'll be ok but I'd love some good ideas on words of wisdom forgo share with her.

Can I correct it so it sounds in tune on standard laptop speakers?

This man is my soul mate. I never knew I could love so unconditionally and intensely. I'm 39 years old, and he's 44. His parents adore me. My parents adore him.

Now, a bit about his siblings: Only sister, 3 years older, cop, married to an abusive divorcee. Feels she could never please her dad. Nicknamed the ice queen by dad and other men in the family. Only brother, 7 years younger than my fiancee, was definitely the black sheep from birth. Does pretty well now, but seems he will always be considered "the bad kid". My fiancee is the only other child, and grew up with his parents openly expressing their opinion that he is 'the perfect son'. I've heard them say it in front of the whole family several times. He probably is 'the perfect son'.

Occasion: Weekly Sunday dinner at his parents house with all 3 siblings, their spouses, and my 4 kids and me.

(NOTE: both other couples have male teens in and out of jail for violence toward their mothers. Both recently permanently removed fm homes, and one very bratty unattractive 19 yr old step-daughter of the older sister..who brought her ex boyfriend along to please him in hopes of winning him back) The older sister and the younger brother's wife say to my 19 yr old daughter and her date, who had his scrawny leg draped across her lap, 'Do you think you could behave more appropriately in front of the family?' Matriarch runs to tell me what was said. Later, when in a group, I asked if they were really being inappropriate. All hell broke loose. I was called a b*****. My daughter was shamed by intentionally hurtful things 2 grown women said.

6 weeks later: Matriarch is sorely disappointed that her perfect son couldnt make it better by personally visiting each offending party. No progress. Some new problems due to his assertiveness.

I sent a few texts to his mom expressing my regret that it happened, yet being clear that I felt uncomfortable coming over til things cooled off. Now I am "hot headed" and 'contentiou's.

Fiacee's input: After 6 weeks of letting him 'deal w it' and their not accepting his peace offerings. He tells me they all say it's contentious to try to solve. He disagrees with my choice to send finally his mother a msg saying it was cruel to blame her son and me for this ongoing problem that only we have cared to solve at all. I'm mad about that.

I was told by the deputy serving the writ of execution that to keep them from selling my children's things or other 'exempt' items, I needed request a hearing. Denied 3 hearings. Took over $5,000 in exempt property for $362 debt.

I've been married 17 years, have been a stay home mother of 5 kids, all 5 w/ A.D.H.D, and the youngest is also mildly autistic. Lots of school problems to solve (alone), and driving to distant Dr's, therapists, etc. Our 4 year old is in an amazing autism preschool. I drive him (2 round trips) 85 miles a day, 4 days a week. The hubby makes 60,000/ yr. on paper, but does side jobs a few times a week. So maybe 150.00 extra per week. He's a controlling guy who most days left me with no money at all to buy food or clothes etc., for the kids. The fridge was almost always empty.My teens started mooching off their friends, so i went to work about 10 hours a week to buy food. I just need to know how I'm gonna make ends meet with my kids. I can't send them to daycare. I could, but it would cost more than i can earn. Their needs are a full time job that I've become good at over the years. I've stretched part time college out through the years and am a full time semester from an associates degree, at least. Any ideas on amounts of money i should expect monthly. I used the online calculator, but given the side work and special needs...and spousal support, it's confusing. Referrals to attorneys who are very good at this would be appreciated.Thanks!

I heard a regular fire wire would work. Is that true?? If so, how do i know which one to buy?

Any info on specifics for nights, weekends, or day minutes would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

I want to run away to Disneyland...without them. I am not okay with them hurting each other. i've heard that I could let them go outside and fight till it's over...but the size difference is not fair. Otherwise, if i really thought it would stop it once and for all i'd do it. I have a 3 yr old son too. I refuse to let him witness this hate in our home. How can i get them to stop? No consolations please, or assurance that it's normal. Boys are not wild animals and are perfectly capable of choosing to be considerate of others' feelings, and not hurting others on purpose. Rough housing, teasing, etc., may have their places, but not the behavior I'm talking about. There are occasional death threats, suicide threats, throwing objects, destroying each other's property...etc. Please help. I need this to stop NOW.

I recently atarted using audacity.

How much better is pro tools?

Or ...is pro tools better at all?

my solos are not getting much faster. HELP!!