Helped ex wife. Am I a nice guy or doormat?

Question

We have been divorced for 2 years.  She cheated on me and left me for other man.  Our divorce got UGLY!!!!  I am over the majority part of it for the most part.  Anyway, we now somewhat get along.  She is always pulling stunts like using the kids front door key to come into my house at all hours of the night.

She calls me last night and tells me her car broke down.  I show up to where she is and she is almost in the middle of the road.  I had the kids with me by the way.  I push her car off the road because it was snowing and getting bad.  I take her and the kids to her house while I work on the car and wait for the tow truck.  It did not arrive until 1 in the morn.  I'm out in the freezing snow thinking to myself, what a schmuck, here I am out in the cold working on her car while she is home dreaming about being with Mr. Wonderful this weekend.  I don't think they are still together but still, why didn't she call him?  I do not think she has moved on very well from the divorce.  She has asked me several times if we could try again.  So what do you think.  Does that make me look like a nice guy or spineless weak man for helping her?

Kate · Answer

Every once in awhile, helping her out is a nice thing to do, but she sounds like she's taking advantage.  No way should she EVER be coming into your house without your permission.  That's ridiculous.  I think you should only help when you want to and say no the rest of the time.  There was no reason that she was the one inside and you were the one outside.

. · Answer

You're allowing yourself to be used, but that's your call...she could easily have called a tow truck to get the car and take it to a shop, but she felt more comfy calling you (someone familiar)...

You're only a doormat if this kind of issue occurs frequently and you tend to find yourself dealing with her problems more often than she is...

BAM · Answer

You are a doormat.  Mr Wonderful should have been the person she called...not you.

If she had the kids at the time, I would have helped her.

Timothy Stephens · Answer

You are a male so start acting like a MAN around this ex.DONT allow her to use you like this.Time to take control and stop being a soft touch.

Nelson · Answer

Although you aren't spineless, you are being used. Mr Wonderful is being used to provide emotional and sexual support for your ex while you are being used for everything else. Next time, say no for once and tell her you are too busy to help.

Helped ex wife. Am I a nice guy or doormat?

Related Questions

Trending Questions