what are the duties for a maid of honor?

You are right in that she is in charge of arranging the bachelorette party and the shower. She also is responsible for helping you to get dressed and ready for the wedding itself. She is responsible for seeing to it that guests at the reception are "taken care of"--she should help out lost-looking guests by engaging them in conversation or steering them toward other guests who could also use some company. She is in charge of contributing to the festive atmosphere of the reception, by encouraging people to dance and dancing with an assortment of the guests--not just the same guy all evening long. She should also be very familiar with the identities of all the major players--parents, grandparents, in-laws. She is responsible for consoling the bride in the event of any emotional upheavals on the big day.

This young lady is doing a lot for the bride, isn't she? Please thank her by letting her wear a dress that flatters her in color and cut and a pair of shoes that don't have her wincing before the vows are even exchanged. Give her a nice gift to.

The best man should help out with the festive-atmosphere duties outlined above--dancing with an assortment of guests, knowing who the heck people are, escorting elderly guests to comfortable tables, and making an excellent toast in which no allusions to the bridegroom's potential infidelities--past or future--are made. Also, the best man and the ushers especially should make sure to actually seat the guests at the ceremony. Space them appropriately, so everyone isn't huddled in the back of the church for fear of being too "forward". Obviously, family goes in the front row and all that. The best man is also in charge of winning the good graces of the bride by being charming to her. This will ensure the likelihood of his continued role in the life of the groom.

Hope this helps.

TALK TO HER ABOUT IT!!!

There are traditional "duties", but beyond showing up she has no reason to think she needs to do anything else unless you tell her!!! Get this stuff out of the way ASAP so that it doesn't become a problem at a more crucial time! Do not assume ANYTHING!

Discuss finances, see what she can afford for a dress and if she will throw a fit if the style isn't to her liking. Usually she would pay herself, but you need to be aware of her budget before making choices. Make sure you also think of the price of shoes, accessories, hair, makeup, and mani/pedis, and the parities you may be expecting. If she says she has $500 put aside for the whole wedding, you can't pick a $400 dress and then ask her to spend $300 on shoes and hair and then $200 on parties.

Also talk to her about time. If you want her to throw parties and come to all sort of dress fittings, be sure she actually has the time for it. Don't expect her to take off work unless she offers, and don't throw a fit if her other responsibilities interfere.

Keep in mind she still has a life, and you need to talk to her about all this to be sure that you remember that. I am sorry if any of this sounds silly, but it is way to easy to go to that wedding place in your mind and forget that she isn't psychic and she does have other things to worry about.

ADD: IT sounds like you are doing fine. I would still have a little converstation with her just to make sure everything is out in the open. If there is something really imprtant to you, make sure she knows.

I really depends on you, sit with your sister and discuss with her all the things that must be done and then ask her what she's willing to organize or help out with. One of my best friends asked me to be her matron of honor, I'm responsible for the bridal shower, bachelorette party, making sure everyone else in the bridal party gets to the dress shop for measurements and that everyone is satisfied with their dresses, I am in charge of making sure everyone gets to the ceremony and reception on time, I'm basically like an assistant wedding planner except they didn't go with a wedding planner - there's certain people in charge of certain things and I act as the coordinator and liaison between everyone. It's been easy so far because the wedding isn't until May 30th so I'm sure it'll get hectic come February and March.

To work with her mom and any sisters etc to plan her shower. You would plan her bachelorette party, Help her when she asks, go dress shopping. plan the stag and doe (if you live in a place that has these).

the best man does the same thing but for the groom.

Also both the MOH and BM will be the ones to put their names on the wedding certificate as witnesses.

the best man also holds the brides ring and gives it to either the minister or groom depending on the plan. If you have ring bears then that may change, but often the ring bearer has a fake ring, we usually do not trust small children with rings worth a lot of money. Maid of honor often holds ring for bride. May help with planning.

I was recently a maid of honor for the first time... I live in another state tho. So I couldn't do too much for her in planning. But while there (a week before) We had a party for them together with friends I and others paid the bill. Also helped her pick out the small things jewerly, shoes. I paid for her nails and half of her bar drinks... I coudn't do much since she lives in a small town and had a handful of friends. But I knw the MofH should be in charge with helping you not stress almost like your personal assistant. She shoudl come up with the Bachellorette party with other friends. But don't push it! Enjoy and congrats.

Other than the bachelorette party and the bridal shower, she will help the bride before and during the wedding. My MoH helped dress me and held my bouquet during the wedding. She also did a speech for the toasts. The best man held our rings before we presented them to each other and he also did a speech during the toasts.

She has no "duties". Being Maid of Honor is not a job or position. Whatever she chooses to do is her choice and gift to you. You have no control over what she does or doesn't do. And, she is only in charge of the showers, if she wants to be.

I'm so tired of brides thinking that their attendants are servants and required to help plan YOUR occasion.

you are in charge of the bridal shower, bachlorette party, putting the favors together, getting the bride to be relax thought the planning, going dress shopping for her.

She's basically there to help you with WHATEVER you need. Like you said, she's reponsible for:

Shower planning/invites/RSVP's/favors/food

Bachelorette party/invites/planning

Breaking down all information that the bridal party needs to know

$$ that the bridal party owes for the shower and/or bachelorette party

The big day she's there to make sure your dress falls correctly, help you pee hahah, whatever you need.

Hope this helps!