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Carol c asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdoption · 1 decade ago

What do you suppose is the real reason trolls come here to be critical of adoptees who search? ?

Do you think as I do that some of them are adoptive parents who are threatened that their own child might search?

Why do some of the olives stay here for months asking the same questions over and over ad nauseum trying to imply there is something unhealthy about adopted people and/or their mothers and fathers trying to find each other?

It's amusing on one hand at how childish they behave, but I fear it's really a sign of some serious insecurities. What's your take?

Update:

Ollie, so this is really your reason - you are the voice of happy adoption? Ummm, do you know what co-dependent is? This is why I think you are an adoptive parent or from the NCFA - adoptees do not need or want you to speak for them here...how utterly silly you are - surely you can see that you haven't changed anyone's mind and that you've become a big joke.

I also want to say that I am not lumping all APs in this category. I know plenty of adoptive parents who get it. Try not to personalize this question - I asked if "some" could be insecure APs.

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    The question was.."What do you suppose is the real reason trolls come here to be critical of adoptees who search? ?""

    I believe these 'trolls' are not only insecure, but also are practicing their very own selfish agendas. And when it comes to adoption (those who spout the myths of adoption as 'truth') are intensely threatened for all manner of reasons. They pose their questions as 'normal', so that it will imply that those who answer these not so thinly veiled questions of bias & hatred..are the 'abnormal'. Some natural mothers do this as well. Is amazing how terribly adoption can affect people...even those people who will not acknowledge that in someway adoption has not been all that wonderful for them. Whether that be adoptees, natural mothers or adoptive parents.

    And then there is the real possibility..the Trolls are pro-adoptionists who work for the industry...adoption agency workers, social workers and shills for the NCFA. These types of 'trolls' actually get paid to do their dirty work on forums, blogs and in chat-rooms. They take what we say back to their little conference rooms and 'analyze' for the good of the profitable Adoption Industry and create 'surveys'. How best to procure more infants for adoption and meet their yearly forecasted gross profit margins. There's more to Adoption then what just meets the eye. It definitely is NOT ALL about 'in the best interest of the child'.

  • 5 years ago

    there is an astonishing overview of this section in the article, “concept of Adoption as Social Stigma: Motivation for seek and Reunion,” by potential of Karen March of Carleton college. The analyze literature states adoptees provide 4 standard motives for reunion: a million) a choose for a greater finished family participants tree, 2) interest approximately events foremost to concept, start, and relinquishment, 3) a prefer to pass on suggestion to infants, and four) a elect for an in depth organic and organic history (inclusive of medical suggestion). even with the undeniable fact that, the article factors out that those motives seem to be in straightforward terms superficial. All of this suggestion must be communicated by potential of a nil.33-celebration, yet each adoptee interviewed additionally expressed a would desire to unquestionably meet their mom. commencing from this element, March’s article tries to validate Goffman’s theory of social stigma (doing an marvelous activity in my view). the belief has 3 steps: a million) adoptees exchange into responsive to the absence of organic and organic ties as distinguishing their family participants from others, 2) this understand-how is bolstered by potential of reviews the place non-adoptees mean adoptive ties are weaker than blood ties; this engenders in the adoptee a feeling of social exclusion from the community, and 3) adoptees cope with this alienation by potential of finding for a blood tie that complements their club in the community. that is taken into consideration necessary be conscious, that this concept shows adoptive properties could be effective and delightful places, yet some adoptees will nonetheless seek using fact of their concept and reviews with social stigma. -Tobit

  • 1 decade ago

    Frankly, while some might be adoptive parents, I don't assume that. Some may be industry hacks trying to drum up more business and silence those that have been hurt by industry. Some may be adoptees who are threatened by the complex picture of adoption being presented by adoptees who have finally found their own voice.

    Adoption is a complex mix of events, emotions and reactions. It's sad that some refuse to see that, that they demand adoption be held up as something perfect, when nothing of human creation is perfect. Anyone selling it as perfect has oversimplified it. That is true for any human construction. Nothing in this world is perfect. That is easy enough to prove. Yet, some persist that adoption is. Why? Because they have an investment in maintaining that belief. For some, there may be an financial investment (the industry). For others, there is an emotional investment (some APs want to believe that their children have not been harmed, some adoptees want to protect their APs, and some first mothers want to believe they did right by their children).

    Some people with that sort of deep emotional investment are not mature enough to have a reasonable discussion about the true complexities of adoption and must maintain, against all the evidence to the contrary, that adoption is simple and perfect. These people may not (to continue that discussion) be in denial (that is, they may not feel any pain connected to their adoption, for real). But they are denying the reality of the complexity inherent in human invention, and the imperfections inherent in such inventions.

    Their reasons may be complex.

    And there may be some people who are just out to upset people. (We've seen a few around here, but I don't think this sort sticks around very long.)

    Source(s): Living life as an adoptee one day at a time
  • Linny
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Do you think as I do that some of them are adoptive parents who are threatened that their own child might search? I think it's a combination of threatened a p's and adoptees. There are a few ap's here who "get it" and are the kind of adoptive parents who parent their kids in reality.

    Then, there are a few adoptees here who are threatened by reality. I really dont think it's their fault, they have just been brainwashed, and perhaps raised in a home that did not believe in unconditional love.But I don't think they are happy if they continually feel the need to divide "the team".

    Why do some of the olives stay here for months asking the same questions over and over ad nauseum trying to imply there is something unhealthy about adopted people and/or their mothers and fathers trying to find each other? I think it's because they are afraid to search, and that they are jealous of those of us who do.

    Denial is a symptom of a larger problem.

    Source(s): reality
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  • Randy
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    I think they come here for the same reason they frequent other forums as well (regardless of the topic). I think they just get a kick out of seeing how shocking, annoying, bigoted or biased they can be to inflame everyones feelings and have a laugh over it. Of course, some honestly believe the crap they spew though so you will always get those kind as well. I think though, for the most part, the only ones to take the bait are the others who are either not regulars here or who let their own emotions get the better of them. For the most part I just treat them like the annoying children they are and ignore them. When they can't get a rise out of people they tend to move on.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I think they can be anyone affected by adoption who is fearful of families reuniting. Let's face it, reunion blows the whole adoption mythology right out of the water. It proves that biological bonds are important and cannot be simply erased by altering a birth certificate or issuing an adoption decree.

    To respond to a certain Pollyanna who wrote, "someone needs to be a voice proclaiming that adoption is a good and just and healthy fact of life!!!!"

    The billion dollar adoption industry is quite capable of waging its own public relations campaign. They don't need any help from us.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think it is just children (or childish people) trying to get a rise out of whoever they can. On other boards it's racism you have to deal with... On yahoo! answers unfortunately it is the adopted people that are sometimes picked on. I have seen adoptive parents and first parents being picked on as well. I think that trolls have just realized that sometimes people put their hearts into post on here and they think that if they get someone angry it is funny. I personally think that all trolls (or anyone who is rude etc.) should be reported and deleted, but that's just me....

  • I think people who just ask the same question over and over aren't really looking for what other people think. I think they're looking for what they want to hear. I do think it's childish and I do agree it is a sign of insecurity.

    I also wonder why someone so happy cant come up with the empathy to feel for people who are going so much pain and why someone happy would sound so bitter and contrary all the time.

  • 1 decade ago

    Most modern day AP's I hang out with do and always did and will continue to support adoptees and natural parents who want to meet and build relationships and not just when the children reach adulthood-my children included.

    We can't speak for those AP's who don't support this line of thinking, but please don't lump us in one category.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Gee, I wonder who you're talking about....

    Maybe they do, or maybe they are just bored during weekends and just you know, come to avoid doing their homework.

    #1 Can of Spam

    -Tempe

    ETA Web of lies Ollie. Really I think you should ask mommy and daddy to get you a babysitter. You know. I think its time for some changes around the house.

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