Should I Tell My Boyfriend I've been cheating on him? Do you think he'll leave me?

How childish. "He owes me because he did something stupid."

You punched me, so I get to punch you. You hurt me, so I get to hurt you.

Revenge...and you wonder if you should tell your boyfriend?

Your motive should not be revenge. Your motive should be genuine respect for him and hopefully love as well.

But if you are going for revenge, then you have already killed the relationship. It just doesn't work.

Have you considered mental health? Depression is real and treatable. Have you considered personal or couples counseling? It probably won't hurt a good relationship, and it will likely help a bad relationship.

Communication and honesty are important. Some things are better left alone. If a man or a woman commits adultery and gets away with it, then it benefits nobody to learn the truth 40 or 50 years later. It will only hurt your spouse.

In contrast, if it is fairly recent it is an indication of a current problem that needs attention.

I strongly recommend couples counseling.

You have to decide what kind of a relationship you want. You have to decide to communicate that with him. You have to decide what your priorities and values are. You have to decide what sacrifices you are willing to make.

And you have to communicate these things in a meaningful manner while allowing him to make the same decisions.

Get professional help. Don't get divorce counseling. Get couples/marriage counseling. There is a difference. True, your relationship might not last. But it should not be because of bad advice.

It's true what they say. Two wrongs definitely don't make a right. It sounds to me, and others as well, that there is a cycle of cheating going on here. It can only snowball and get worse unless broken. I don't think it's right to be cheating on one another. Keeping it to yourself will only make matters worse in the long haul.

Maybe you should take time out for yourself, to figure out what you really want. It sounds like the two of you don't want the same things. Do some soul searching. Be honest with yourself about what you really want and not focusing so much on how to keep him if it's not what you really want or need.

If it's meant to be, it will happen. Things will either sort themselves out or you'll begin again with someone new.

Hope this helps.

If a friend of yours gave you this much information about a relationship that didn't seem to be working out, what advice would you give her? Don't you want a real life with dinners, conversations, walks in the park, and intimate contact? Don't you want to plan a vacation with someone who wants to be with you and travel to a wonderful place? It need not be an expensive trip, just a chance to be together. Where are you going to be five, ten years from now is you stay in this relationship. Good luck in the future.

tell him, dont tell him it doesnt really matter. all that matters is that you had fun even if it was just for a few months,

now you could look at this either way.

either you could consider what he's doing to your personal life (no fun, no marriage, no kids)

or

you could look at what he's done for you, he works his *** off to support you, why would he do this if he didnt care about you, maybe this is his way of showing you how much he wants you around, even if he doesnt pay much attention to you,

this work thing is definately a problem, but nothing you can't work around, and if i had to choose one, i'd say dont tell him, your relationship still has a chance and telling him that youve been cheating will only ruin it.

hang in there, things could change at any time

Stop the cheating, even if he is ignoring you the first step is to stop cheating, take a step back and look at your life do you really want to be the miserable trophy GIRLFRIEND? you guys need to have a long talk and come clean about the cheating just not how many times you did it, if you guys love each other you can make it work :)

Well - if you tell him and your relationship surbvies it - you will have learned a lesson. If not - you will have learned a lesson anyway.

You sound like a very selfish woman - and maybe it would be far better for him to go his own way - knowing the state of his aircraft (as they say). He had a one night stand and told you? Hmm - well at least he told you - try the same.....

just because he cheated on you 5 years ago on a one night stand, it doesnt justify what you're doing repetetively. if you want to sleep with other people, leave him. you cant be selfish and have the best of both worlds. the truth always comes out in the end. tell him the truth and if you're lucky enough for him to stay with you, stop cheating on him.

Well my opinion is to be honest and tell him what you did tell him also why you did it an if he doesn't forgive you maybe he is not the one for you I mean you said it yourself he works to much and he doesn't want to get married, maybe it's time to see new people

Well, I think if he really loves you then he would forgive you if you tell him. Its really up to you. But if he is ignoring you, doesn't spend time with you, why would you want him to forgive you? I wouldn't if I were you. But hey, its just my opinion. Just do what you think is right!

You'll have to go to a councilor with this. I wouldn't tell him, because he may be cheating on you.

Just go to a councilor.

PUT YOURSELF FIRST ...after all he hasn't put you first has he?