How do you deal with lonileness and sadness ?

Question

I ve been depressed since I remember being concient . as a child I didn t interact well with others yet the only thing I ever thought about was social interaction. It seems the more I wanted it and the more I needed it the more needy I became just making people stay away from me even more. Until today at age 22 I spend my days in anguish. Sometimes I feel like it s going to kill me. I ve tried asking people to hang out, guys and girls but either peole always say no or they cancel the plans a few hours before it happens. The second is even more painful becouse I spend some days building up hope and expectations and than it all comes down. I ve resorted to smoking weed all day or drinking heavily to help numb me. But I can t be ****** up all day since I gotta go to work and stuff but it s so hard to perform well when there is a whole in your chest like this. If I could I d choose to have every single bone in my body broken instead of this pain I can t explain. I had a girlfriend when I was 18 to 21, I thought it was gonna fix everything but I Stil felt like **** and even worse I brought her down too until she left me for good. Every once in a while I feel extrnely energetic and happy. But it only lasts 20 minutes to a few hours and I sink in a even deeper whole after it. Sometimes someone smiles at me or touches my shoulder to say something and it causes my heart to race and my emotions to fly in all dirextikns. How much I cherish those moments.

Update:

I guess the best idea is to join some kind of club. Hard to get the motivation to do so. But a good sugestion.

All hat · Accepted Answer

That's a classic and brilliant description of it.  If nothing else, you are eloquent.

The only cure IS other people.  And if they don't want to hang out with you on just pure social basis, then join a club, group, organization, something.  Volunteer firefighter.  Tutor.  Meetups.  Bike club.  Anything.  But something.  Gotta go get that social contact.  I joined a sailing club to hopefully meet some gals my age, and the place is full of 80 year old men who can't shut up about what happened to them in WW2.  Crissake.  But ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

Lucian · Answer

Story of my life on being loner and feel sad.  I never understood my purpose in this world.  I'm deaf, and I don't fit in hearing and deaf world.. That when I realized it was me.. And there alway people trying to cause trouble for me and people that seem jealous of me.

I just go by it, I don't care anymore, am so sick and tired of it..  I'm soo tired.. I can't take my life because my life doesn't belong to me, it belong to Jesus and God..  Perhaps its a test to see if I can go though it the hardship.

I don't even have connection with family, because I'm alway left out, its not their fault.. So I just go in my bed room and shut the door..  I don't have connection with my Neice or Nephew.. only say Hi that about it.  Or give them Soda..  I live in role playing game.. It give me comfort...

? · Answer

Develop the personality of a  schizoid person. (Look it up, many people don't know what it really is.)
Things are much better.
Principals of if you don't try you can't lose.
Nothing ventured nothing lost.
and "such a pity, but it wasn't me." work well to avoid depression.
Depression is the idea that something you want or need is out of your grasp. If you don't need or want it you can be very happy or at the least content with what you do have.

El · Answer

Stop looking for people's company.first make friends with yourself. Find out your inner self,what you are good at? Music,crafts,game,cooking? Or may b try each ... go outside,try to enjoy the nature.. engage in some social works lik helping people around. Search the things you are good at. Spend time with kids at park or something. Life is too short to waste, when you love yourself and care about yourself, other people will come close automatically. Hope this helps my friend, stay awesome and positive

Naguru · Answer

I have my own permanent mentor from whom I frequently take clarifications for all my genuine doubts.

I don't want to disturb others for my sake. In may case, I suffer because of "lionliness" and not because of sadness. I have a lion's heart. I "love freedom".

Some body has given you a wrong rumor about me. As you say in your question, I am never "lonileness"

By the way what is "lonileness"

Mortal Dimunitive · Answer

You may very well have a deficiency in an important nutrient(s). Definitely check that out by an herbal  are providers. General practioners may just put you on innafective anti-depressions that have other more serious side effects.

kyle · Answer

One of the things that helped me was empathy. I realised that everyone feels lonely on some level. They are all waiting for someone to really connect with them and acknowledge them as a person.. Recognise them.as existing. If you can do those things for others it makes a.big difference in your life and theirs.

Aris · Answer

You have to stop living for others and learn to live for urself. Try to go out more and experience more so that you can understand what makes u happy

●°strewberrycandy ❤┐ · Answer

i usually stay in bed and cry for whole day long if I got upset, but I guess music can change the mood so stick with it.

? · Answer

Be with other people.

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How do you deal with lonileness and sadness ?

12 Answers