about a year ago I was not happy in the marriage. I told my wife that amI don't want to leave her, but I was unhappy. Stress got to me?

It's great you try to show her you love her often.

You need to know that when women are raising young children/toddlers, their life revolves around the kids mostly. She's "into" the kids and Mother Nature does actually provide that a woman's hormone levels decrease while she's raising young children. This is something we are not taught at anytime during our educational years, but it's oh so true. It's not you... it's just the way of nature.

I'm glad things have gotten better for you two. My suggestion is, if you can find a great, reliable babysitter, one with references or a family member to keep your kids once in a while, go out on dates. Or take her overnight to a nice hotel from time to time.

You sound awesome and i'm glad you seem to be a hands-on dad. I have noticed that hands-on dads are the most compassionate men in the world.

best wishes.

Try harder. Actions matter, but words can be devastating. A few unwelcome words can require many, many actions to mitigate their impact. When people don't communicate regularly and often, it produces the kind of dilemma you're facing. You might be smart to discuss this with your spouse and see if the two of you can be more open, honest, and sensitive to the other's situation and circumstances. That, too, should help.

You are making a big mistake making the assumption that what you said a year ago has affected her deeply. In fact you are making a big mistake making any assumptions about your wife. If you want to know how she actually feels, just ask her. If you are sorry for what you said and wish to be forgiven, just admit it and ask for forgiveness. If you do make the effort, you will discover that about 80% of your assumptions are completely wrong, thus you are worrying about stuff that doesn't exist. If you want to show her you really love her, there is one way to do it. Listen to her.

Ask her if she is happy...sometimes when women give too much of themselves and no me time...they begin to resent everyone ...

Sounds like you have no communication with your wife you need to change this if you want to make things better yes kids can make it tough and very stressful and the husband does get left behind when the kids come along that is life. Make time for yourself and her and if you have already discussed not having anymore kids consider Mr. Vasectomy 2 is plenty. Quite likely the threat of pregnancy being erased may make much stress for you and her vanish just make sure you get tested after a few months and make sure your shooting blanks before you go wrap free.

My favorite book of all time is "The Five Love Languages." I would suggest every married person reads it. You say she's changed some of the things she does to make you feel happier. I love that, it shows she truly cares. My concern is, have you changed to make her happier. You say, you tell her you're happy but your happiness alone doesn't complete her. The same way her happiness left you lonely. You say you show her you love her, but do you really? In the book, it states that every individual has a "love language." It's the actions that make them feel the most loved.You can be doing all sorts of "nice" things but if you're not speaking her love language you make be missing the mark completely. To find out what makes her most happy think back to when you first met. What would she do for you (nonsexual) when she wanted to make you happy, when she wanted to show she cared about you. That's could be a clue to how she receives love signals. Since most people show love the way they'd like to receive it. If you don't already, you could join her in her love for her mommy role.

Being honest does not mean you must disclose every thought you have. some things are better kept to yourself. This was one of them. I got a secret to tell you No parent of toddlers is actually very happy about it It is a difficult time that does cause as much stress as it brings joy and happiness. You were going through a stage life with very little ones is a test of strength and patience. it passes as will all phases of life No she probably does not believe you now. You need to have a talk with her to explain your past words and what made you say them and then tell her how and why your thoughts have changed Perhapse you were being selfish or immature regarding your role as a parent You need to be honest again if you want to clear up this cloud between you. You broke her trust and that is something that is very difficult to restore and sometimes it just cannot be done. Watch what you say because a few sharp words can change your life so that it never goes back to what it once was. Sorry does not fix everything