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And we haven't told her about sex. She's 6 and hasn't witnessed anything sexually violent, or at least I hope. But she has dreams of a crazy man putting his hands down there while she is tied down.

She also has nightmares of bugs coming out of her vagina.

What could this mean?

Help?

Thanks

What would this qualify as (if anything) if it happened between two people, both minors, at the time, in high school (this was years ago so it's no longer happening). One side did NOT want this happening.

-grabs butt/waist of another as she passes

-puts head very close to crotch as she pushes away (she's standing; he's sitting)

- runs hand up inner thighs

- tries to touch crotch, she pushes away

- one time, says "i will have sex with you tonight. She says, "no". He says, "you will. I'm coming to your house". Thank goodness it was an empty threat.

This went on for a little under a year, but everything he did he did jokingly and in a nonchalant manner. When she took him seriously and got upset, he'd say "what's wrong with you? I'm just kidding. Do you actually think I'd want to do that?"

She always threatened to tell, but her threats were as empty as his. She also threatened to tell his girlfriend but he said no one would believe her.

What did this count as? Was I a wimp?

I had an odd, VERY odd dream last night. In it, there was a snake coming out of my holes (downstairs bodily holes, if you get what I'm saying). It wasn't coming out though, even though I think it was trying, so I grabbed it by its tail and yanked, but it didn't go so smoothly. It hurt something inside of me. Eventually, it came out, but it had fallen limp and dead and then I felt really guilty as if i was the one who killed it.

That was that, but it reminds me of dreams I would have when I was really young, before I was 10 even, of bugs coming out of my vagina/ going inside of me. I had that dream recently too though; something brought it back.

What could this mean?

Hi,

As a child and presently I would have (still have) nightmares about being molested or raped.

The molestation dreams are cartoonish and it's always the same man doing it. The rape dreams are more often violent and realistic. The molestation dreams aren't violent aside from being tied down.

Most of the molestation nightmares I would have as a very young child. What would cause this? My therapist thinks that the only explanation would be that I was molested, but I'm not convinced.

I have *some* memories that are suggestive and some people might classify what I remember as abusive but it was really minor and depends on who you ask. Nothing I remember is as explicit as what I used to dream.

Aside from molestation, what could cause this?

I want to know all of the possibilities and not focus on one like my therapist has been doing. She thinks based on what I recall (which is little and barely abusive if at all, I must say) and my dreams, it happened. What else causes this?

If an uncle wanted to spoon with his 4-7 year old niece, but she didn't want to, yet he "made" her, how far is that beyond the realm of normal?

Is there a case in which it would not be creepy or inappropriate?

If that is remembered, should it be looked further into or would it be best for one just to leave it at that?

Additionally, if this did happen and one had other memories that s/he was unsure about with said uncle, would it be safe to say that the other things vaguely remembered, but not certainly recalled, happened?

Well, therapy is going. I'll give you some backstory.

I initially began therapy because

a) deep feelings of guilt

b) shame from past event(s)

c) a few strange memories and nightmares that I can't explain

The last point, c, has left me confused about what might have happened to me as a kid. I remember some sketchy things happening. Those are concrete memories. Then there are other, less certain memories, yet more explicit, which were "recalled" (but not concretely?) after some other things happened. But these are in no way certain.

I told my therapist about these, and she said, based on the sexually explicit nightmares that I had as a child and the vague recollections, she thinks that it's near certain I was molested.

I have an issue with this because

a) how can anyone know?

b) she has a vested interest in my issues, although I trust her.

I'm still at the "maybe" part. I think maybe I was molested. I have no way of knowing though.

I asked my therapist how she would deal with a maybe, and she responded that she couldn't say because she isn't me.

So, I ask you all. How do you deal with "maybe"? How do you cope with uncertainties? My therapist told me what healthy coping might look like if I resolved to believe a yes, and I see how that would be helpful, but I'm not there. I'm not at a yes. At least, not yet.

What do I do?

Thanks.

My therapist told me yesterday that with the information I have given her about my early sexual knowledge, the way my uncle acted, and the nightmares of molestation I would have that it's safe to say, "not 100%, but quite suggestive" that I was molested.

She asked,"where do we go from here?"

I have no idea. I don't want to talk about details.

Does this mean my memories are correct?

I don't want to talk about those with her.

I can't even say aloud some of the things that I'm scared of.

Should I take her words as the gospel truth? Can she really determine a yes or no?

How do I deal with this?

How did YOU deal with this?

I've never actually coped healthily in my life between anorexia, self harm, and depression.

Please help.

I'm less confused, but more...lost?

Thanks

Do you believe in dissociative amnesia?

I'm not sure what to think about it.

What has led you to believe what you believe?

I was never violently raped and I'm also a virgin.

These are better destined as nightmares and they are definitely NOT fantasies as I wake up crying.

I've had about 14 nightmares in the past 20 days.

Many of them were centered around rape or molestation.

In one, I was even prepubescent and being raped by a man whom I trust.

What can I do to stop these?

Hi, everyone.

I just wanted I guess to take a survey to see public opinion on physical touch with family.

How much is too much?

Which behaviors are innappropriate with whom?

I know parents can spoon children, but uncles? Can uncles spoon nieces?

How close emotionally should someone be with a non-immediate family member before they spoon?

If the (quite young) niece or nephew didn't want to spoon, yet the uncle made her(along with other types if physical contact), is that acceptable behavior?

If some contact is forced, is that inherently wrong/creepy or should the child think nothing of it and move on?

If the uncle was drunk (with the assumption that such behavior is wrong), would this behavior be expected?

Thanks for your opinion

When do you doubt it and when should you trust it?

Or is it just sweet?

Is it normal?

What if the child doesn't want it?

Could it be argued that the uncle's relationship with his own daughter was so weak that he felt he needed a connection with another child about his daughter's age?

I'm a little confused right now regarding some boundary lines. I'm not sure if any were maybe crossed when I was a child. Is spooning crossing a line? And, not massaging the butt in an obviously creepy way, but just having your hand on it: is that "wrong"? So many "inappropriate" things (from my perception) were done, but they fall into the grey area of behavior and it was all so nonchalant. It makes me feel bad for questioning it at all. Here's another that maybe is an inappropriate memory, but maybe if I looked at it differently it would be sweet: he told me to lay with him on the couch. I didn't want to so I shook my head "no" but eventually he coerced me. We were laying there and he told me to lay on his butt so I did. Somehow I think his hand was on mine, but I don't even know if that's physically possible.

Then he turns over, opens his legs, and playfully straddles my head with his legs. I was saying, "no, no, no", but I think he found it funny.

Is that sweet or creepy? I really don't know how to view these things.

How would you feel if you were the mother and you walked in on the (now estranged) uncle being that close? How would you feel as the child? As the uncle even?

Is this behavior normal and perhaps I'm just naïve?

Thanks

I'm averaging like 3 a week.

They're horrifying: my face melting, a man with a sheet white face above my bed, getting raped, being chased through fire, etc.

That isn't normal, is it?

I have a friend who says she vaguely remembers being hurt as a little girl.

She mentioned some memories coming back a few months ago, but we only talked about it again last week.

She doesn't know if what happened was considered molestation:

Here is what absolutely happened:

Her uncle, who was drunk (as always), told her to lie down and spoon with him. She wouldn't, but he coerced her into it by saying something like: "what's wrong? Is uncle mean? Is uncle scary? Is uncle stinky?"

He had his hand on her rump and was moving it back and forth. I think he also had his leg between hers.

He told her to lay on his "butt" and squeezed her head between his legs, he was laughing.

He did run his hands up and down her legs and *maybe even* she thinks on her genital area (while she was clothed).

This is one thing she's confused about, she says. She doesn't know if that was just him messing around or if he was using her for pleasure.

This is where memories get sketchy. These were "recovered" on her own but she doesn't know (nor do I) if these actually happened:

Digital penetration

Fondling

Maybe even child rape

She remembers the first two very vaguely, that's why she doesn't trust them. The last she assumed was possible because of the nightmares she had/has.

She also refuses to get therapy.

She had nightmares about rape and digital penetration before she even knew what sex was. She's always had weird dreams, so at first, neither of us really thought anything of it until she started getting concerned.

She doesn't trust men.

She *says* she played really sexually with her pets as a kid in very much adult ways. This was still before she "knew" about sex.

I don't know what to tell her. I've looked online and she fits the profile for someone who was molested:

Fear of sex

Nightmares of rape/molestation

Extreme sexual play as a child

Eating disorders

Distrust of men

Sexual confusion

Low self esteem

Signs of PTSD

Fear of dark

What do you think happened?

I have a friend who says she vaguely remembers being hurt as a little girl.

She mentioned some memories coming back a few months ago, but we only talked about it again last week.

She doesn't know if what happened was considered molestation:

Here is what absolutely happened:

Her uncle, who was drunk (as always), told her to lie down and spoon with him. She wouldn't, but he coerced her into it by saying something like: "what's wrong? Is uncle mean? Is uncle scary? Is uncle stinky?"

He had his hand on her rump and was moving it back and forth. I think he also had his leg between hers.

He told her to lay on his "butt" and squeezed her head between his legs, he was laughing.

He did run his hands up and down her legs and *maybe even* she thinks on her genital area (while she was clothed).

This is one thing she's confused about, she says. She doesn't know if that was just him messing around or if he was using her for pleasure.

This is where memories get sketchy. These were "recovered" on her own but she doesn't know (nor do I) if these actually happened:

Digital penetration

Fondling

Maybe even child rape

She remembers the first two very vaguely, that's why she doesn't trust them. The last she assumed was possible because of the nightmares she had/has.

She also refuses to get therapy.

She had nightmares about rape and digital penetration before she even knew what sex was. She's always had weird dreams, so at first, neither of us really thought anything of it until she started getting concerned.

She doesn't trust men.

She *says* she played really sexually with her pets as a kid in very much adult ways. This was still before she "knew" about sex.

I don't know what to tell her. I've looked online and she fits the profile for someone who was molested:

Fear of sex

Nightmares of rape/molestation

Extreme sexual play as a child

Eating disorders

Distrust of men

Sexual confusion

Low self esteem

Signs of PTSD

Fear of dark

What do you think happened?

1. Is that hypocritical?

I feel bad for stopping. Should I?

I feel like I could become a pescetarian quite easily. However, I'm still wary of the fish market.

2.What fish/crustacean industries should I avoid? I know the shrimp market is horrible.

3. If I'm concerned about animal rights, what brands should I not buy?

Suggestion by the "victim" her/himself?

If one had foggy memory of his/her childhood and started thinking really hard about a sketchy uncle and suddenly, a memory came back, would you question it's validity?

I mean, if it came back without her trying, it would most likely be legitimate.

However, if she was digging for a memory , that would be questionable, wouldn't it?

The reason I was digging was because I had really explicitly sexual dreams beginning probably at four. They werent good dreams, either. They were dreams about being molested and raped. I didn't learn about sex until I was probably 10 or 11. Also, we didn't have cable so I wasn't exposed to porn or anything.

I remember some weird things with my uncle, but I don't know if the memory is true.

Is there a way to know?

Thanks

Is it psychological or physiological?

Where is the line drawn?

Is butt fondling molestation?

With clothes on, is genital touching molestation?

Is straddling followed by other things considered molestation?

If one were to say "they were molested" while talking about the above things, would that be over dramatic or foolish? Is it histrionic to say? Or if one doesn't want to disclose all the details, and they just wanted to say, "I was molested", would they been seen as someone who was playing the victim or as with a martyr complex?

Thanks

I feel like I have to scream or talk but I don't even know what to say.

I'm really confused. I think I was molested as a kid but I'm not sure. Are memories recovered from repression valid?

I had dreams about wing fingered when I was really young and I was addicted to masturbation at least from the age of four. I did really weird things too that I can't even write. My uncle was abusive and alcoholic. If anything happened, it was him.

I looked up symptoms of sexually abused children and I had most of them. I can't tell if my memory is valid.

Please help

What should I do? I don't know what to feel or think.