Just for fun..The attractive factor what do you think?

Sorry if this answer is too long-winded but it's just me and I tend to think deeper than most. I like your deep question. After some thought, more thought, a snickers bar, and more thought. I think this. Not that you don't know or realize this already, but we really do live in a sometimes very cruel world. I'm not cynical. Just a realist. Any human heart is capable of creating so much beauty and yet so much destruction. No matter what they look like. My first thought is that all people regardless of their appearance can be tempted. Even the "not so attractive" girl that is taken advantage of in school by the "very handsome" popular jock who has a "hottie" for a girlfriend. This same not so attractive girl who was taken advantage of by the jock, also currently has a "not so attractive" boyfriend. Whom she just burned. Why? Plain old temptation? YES. Self-esteem issues? YES. Not happy with her "not so attractive" unknowing boyfriend? PERHAPS. Lets

remember that there are ALWAYS variables that can be a list a mile long, and those variables are always very specific to each individual person. And why did the "handsome jock" choose to take advantage of a "not so attractive" girl when he seemingly has it made on the oustide, and has a "very attractive" unknowing hottie of a girlfriend? Well most of the time it is obvious why. But again the variables, the human heart, our environment growing up, how we esteem ourselves all come into play. The handsome jock may very well have burned his girlfriend for the same reasons the homely girl burned her boyfriend. Granted. Even though on the outside it obviously looks like a clear case of selfishness on the jocks case, and lack of self-esteem on the homely girls side. Many, many beautiful people have very low self-esteem, while many, many not so beautiful people have very high self esteem. Ya neverrrrrrr knowwwww. The fact is they took advantage of each other, and knowingly were unfaithful, because they were both currently already in a relationship. While the two un-mentioned mates....find the bad news out later. Or maybe not. My point again is that the so-called beautiful people and the so-called not so beautiful people can and will make the same exact mistakes regardless of the way they look. BUT I also see your angle. That being, do less attractive people maintain better relationships soley because they seem to have less options, thus less temptations? Wait. What about the so-called beautiful people and the potential temptation to over-estimate themselves and so they fail horribly at any attempt at relationships, being SO consumed with this love for them-selves? Hmmm? I might need another snickers bar. Nahhh. Moving right along. In my final analysis, I'll have to give an ironicly general answer on this interesting topic. And that is any two people regardless of looks, or race, etc...etc, must together believe in LOVE to make a relationship work and endure for a lifetime (as they continue to work at it ). SELFISHNESS will destroy any relationship, and we all need to be aware of that. Look at Hollywood marriages and that stark picture of reality. Divorce rate 99%? Ouch! Beautiful on the outside, or not so beautiful on the outside. It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside. Neither the more attractive or less attractive has the upper hand when it comes to maintaining a relationship. I know , I know...I could have said that at the beginning, but then it wouldn't have been as fun! *wink* Lets throw "inner beauty" into the mix next time. Food for thought huh? Thanks for your question and I hope you enjoyed my answer. I mean novel. ;) -Robert-

First of all, I don't think that attractive or not so attractive people make better or worse mates. Both may experience temptations no matter who the beholder is :) Secondly, a person may have a beautiful wife/husband, but does that mean the relationship will be a success? Nope. Look at all those celebrities who marry beautiful women and cheat on them like no tomorrow? Or those wives who have good, handsome husbands but treat them like dirt? Attraction does play a very important role when looking for "the one". A person wants someone who is decent and charming, but after a while, when the looks fizzle, what do you have left? The person must have substance, something that will sustain them forever(brains, compassion, intense love, spirituality).

Well, I'll tell you. Although I've been told many times I'm a good looking man. When I was in high school I was pretty damn fat. Then when I moved out at 18 I'd lost 100 pounds in a year. Everywhere I went girls liked me, I didn't even have to say or do anything. Then, unfortunately, 3 years later I had to start taking this medication and I gained a lot of weight. No matter how much I excercised. Now I'm back to being overweight, but not like before. Pretty damn overweight though.

Through all this I didn't stop trying to find relationships. In fact when I was in high school it was almost easier. You say my options were limited. However, my attitude is: I'm more than likely not going to get ANY girl. So I may as well go to the hot girl/cool girl/the one I want. So that's what I did. In fact, I talked to every hot girl. I got phone numbers. It was certainly much much harder (seemingly) but my options were no more limited than they were when I was slim (better looking). In fact, when I was slim, pretty much my only option was to get laid. Nobody wanted to be my girlfriend. Except for overweight not so good looking girls and, I'm sorry...I have a complex. Some fat girls can be very cute and have great personalities. I've liked them. Most, however, have very low self-esteem and even more self-pity. Which makes them act bitchy, whiny and needy. Nobody wants that.

Since I've regained the weight all of a sudden I have to have a personality again. Sort of. I guess maybe chasing women who are 10 years older than me is stupid, but I'm too overweight to get 20 year olds...who pretty much just wanna find a hot guy to sleep with anyway. Because, I still talk to them just cause I don't get them. Although, I do have one girl. I don't even know how I pulled her, because I didn't even do anything, and I never pay for ish.

My point is, when it comes to an actual relationship it's not so much that looks matter. It's more experience. It relates to the person. What they believe in, etc. If you've got a good man, who's nice, treats you right, and more than likely is religious. Well then, he probably wont cheat on you. However, if you've got a man who doesn't give a ****. Especially because he's been pulling girls based on his looks since junior high and gets to act like a dick, he probably will be less faithful and experienced. Perhaps better in bed, yet, less able to handle his emotions. Say, for example, an extended family member of mine. Who has literally slept with hundreds of girls. Just sits down somewhere and girls come out of the woodwork. He changes girls about every season. He's got a summer girl, a fall girl, etc. He's not an asshole. However he ain't very faithful. He only likes those good first 3-4 months of a relationship where everything is still an illusion. It might seem that negates my point. Yet I still chalk it up to experience and the individual.

There are plenty of guys, who are attractive to plenty of girls, and don't know what the f they're doing. Because I'm always the one that's got to tell them. Meanwhile I stay single.

For men, the dominant factor is not looks. It's success. I would say money, but that's a different game. At least that's what I find. Nothing lights up a womans eyes when after knowing me a little bit, she finds out I'm on my way to being successful. Guess what's going to happen when I get there though? I won't trust annnny-body

As far as women go, I think the important thing besides looks is just to not be a slu.t. If you've got some sort of personality, it's not that hard to get a man. It's more that you choose a man who hasn't developed his personality. He's still immature, because, why change when what he's doing is working?

It's much harder to be a good man than a good *****

Based on the attractiveness factor alone, I agree with the first option you said. In my opinion the "less attractive" people work extra hard to keep what they have (especially if it's going good) because somewhere in the back of their minds, they think they will never have another chance at what they got. I don't know if we can call that insecurity...maybe, maybe not. From what I have seen with my own friends, the more attractive ones are somehow the most insecure and most callus when it comes to their relationships. There are also the ones who are "over confident" and tend to be careless with their choices because they somehow think they can just waltz up to anyone and get whomever they set their eyes on when their relationships fail to work. Just my $.02.

BTW, yours is a good question.

The better looking the man or woman, the more "options" or tempations that he/she has so therefore, they are more likely to cheat and are more likely to be bad girlfriends/boyfriends/husbands/wives.

If a person is not attractive, they (unless they have money or another variable) will either not get a partner, or get a partner of the same relative attractivness and they will both try to keep what they have for as long as they can, because they don't know if anyone else will ever like them therefore they won't cheat and they'll be better partners.

So when men or women say "I'll never cheat" or "I've never cheated" it is usually (not always) because they couldn't cheat because no one else wanted them, or thier choice was worse than their current partner so it wasn't worth it. So don't fall for the "my man/woman is so good" routine:they're onyl as good as the options they have. IF they could get someone else who was really hot, then they'd treat you like crap and cheat on you...not in all cases but most of them.

what ever happened to just being with someone becuz they make u happy & treat u right, those chicks in playboy all airbrush.when was the lastime u saw Miss 1996 center fold from play boy, no amont of make-up,platic surgery r tummy tucks will keep ur man/woman happy r faithful 2 u. that's ur job as a person to do, people need to stop thinking short term when it comes to life. find u someone that's going 2 put ur needs before theres, if u ur sick they will take care of you, someone that sees u as a equal.

Physical attributes are only a snall part of things

I myself never went for good looking men.

Yet they were attractive in some way.

Unfortunately there characters were very flawed

.So I don't know the answer.

I didn't go for the looks factor this last time. I don't think looks matter at all. It's a matter of what one is comfortable with themselves.

WOW . A GREAT QUES IN DETAIL THAT DOES N'T ALLOW ME TO PONDER FOR AN ANSWER SINCE U HAVE SAID IT ALL. BUT COME WT MAY- THE ATTRACTION FACTOR DOES COUNT A BIT COZ THERE IS NO MAKING LOVE TO A PERSON UNLESS U ATLEAST FALL IN LOVE AT THAT MOMENT.

The more attractive you are, the more likely you are to attract jealous, insecure, dysfunctional nitwits. The drama works both ways.