Jennifer

I tried asking this in real estate but I'm not having any luck. I'm getting ready to move to CA in a few weeks and since I've been living in military housing in Germany I haven't paid bills in three years. I'd like to get an idea of how much utilities are in the US in general. Where are you from? How much do you pay on average for water/sewer, garbage, gas, and electric? Also, how big is your house and how many kids do you have?

I'm moving to CA in a few weeks and will be living in the Yuba City/Marysville area. It's been a few years since I lived in the US and I'd like to know what the average utility bills are so that I don't wind up renting a house for too much. I want my housing allowance to cover rent and utilities. So how much do you pay on average for water/sewer, garbage, electric and gas? Thanks in advance for your inputs.

I have an interesting situation - I live overseas in Germany and have a vonage phone with a west coast area code. We are getting ready to move back to the US and I called comcast to ask a question, I didn't give them the vonage number at all. Since then I've been getting calls about twice a day from their sales department but the problem is they see a west coast number not knowing that I'm 9 hours ahead of western time so the calls come at around 1 and 3 in the morning. I keep telling them that I live in Germany and have a vonage number and not to call again but it doesn't stop. I'm dying here - I just registered my number with the do not call registry but that can take up to 31 days. Is there anything I can say to them to make them take me seriously and take me off their damn call list? Can this be considered harassment or anything?

I currently have a 2002 Honda Accord V6 with about 93,000 miles on it. It's got every option that you could get on that year and the trade in value is about 7K and with the current high point in used car values I'm debating trading it in for a new car. My payment is $185 per month right now and in order to ensure that it doesn't go much higher my options for a new car are limited to a Ford Fiesta or a Hyundai Elantra. I'm going back and forth right now - thinking I should because trade in values are so high and then thinking I shouldn't because it's still a perfectly good mechanically sound car. I could scope the dealership for used cars but with today's high used car values I'm leaning towards just going new. What do you guys think?

I just received notification that I will be stationed at Beale AFB. I'm currently in Germany or else I would plan a weekend trip to see the local area around the base. I'm specifically looking for information about the towns around Beale AFB (Yuba City, Marysville, Wheatland, Linda, Olivehurst). I've done some research and Rocklin, Roseville, Lincoln, and Lake Wildwood are too far out for me to commute - they are all outside of my 30 minute max zone.

I'd like to know about general living conditions in my preferred towns. Is it advisable to buy or rent a house? I've heard that some of the areas I specified are in a flood plain but can't find any maps that are easily comprehensible (the government and FEMA maps are more confusing than helpful.)

I should recieve a sponsor shortly who can begin to answer my questions but any information that anyone could provide is more than welcome.

I work 9-10 hours a day and I'm going to college, granted I'm only taking one class at a time so that I don't bite off more than I can chew. My husband works 6 hours a day and spends the rest of his time watching TV shows on the internet. Occasionally he'll take out the trash but I usually have to remind him. Sometimes he'll unload the dishwasher. I usually come home to dishes and empty pop cans left out. I also do the majority of caring for our daughter. Recently my husband went back to our hometown for a few weeks and I realized that I'm happier, more productive, and more motivated at work, at home, and doing schoolwork when he's not here. The house stays clean and I have less stress. I care about him and divorce is not on my radar at this time - but I just want him to move back in with his mom and give me a break. Is this really bad? Has anyone else felt this way? If so what happened in your situation - was living seperately a good thing or did it ultimately end your marriage?

Not a lot of answers in government so I figured I'd ask here. I see more questions about benefits here than in any other catagory anyway...

I've seen a lot of questions in various catagories talking about benefits people recieve in the UK. It seems that there are benefits for everything. Are these all automatic? Like if you have a child you automatically get a child benefit no matter how much you make or are they a form of welfare for low-income people? I'm just curious cause I live in Europe and it seems that people pay outrageous taxes in European countries - at least compared to the US and I really can't understand why the government taxes people who work so much to give it away to others. I realize the US does this too but I pay about 10% of my income to taxes and if I worked in Germany it would be 49% and I'd have to pay a 19% sales tax on almost everything I purchased.

Well, it's almost 7am Christmas morning here in Germany and my kid isn't awake yet so...Where do you put your kid's Christmas stocking?

We don't have a fireplace or any type of mantle. We have steel frames on the doors so I usually use a magnetic clip to hang my daughters on her door frame the night before then I fill it up and it's too heavy to hang. I lean it up against her door so that when she wakes up and comes out it falls into her room. This is the first year that she's really aware of Santa so I'm hoping for a big reaction :)

I'm really at a loss here. In the past few months I've done some research on depression and begun to understand it more. I'm trying to be more supportive of my husband but I need some advice on specific situations. What am I supposed to do when there is something that I've asked him to do and he keeps putting it off? I asked him to take our portable AC unit down to the storage unit 3 months ago and it's still sitting in our living room. I remind him on occasion but his "legs hurt" or his "back hurts" and he can't do it. I've offered to help him move it and it's never a "good time". Should I just go ahead and move it myself? Will this just make him feel worse? I refuse to leave it because our apartment is very small and I'm just fed up with it being in the way. In addition we changed out the wheels and tires on my car and the old wheels and tires are still sitting in my trunk and back seat and it's been a week - I can't do weekly grocery shopping. He promised to move them this morning before he went to work but didn't. I don't want to make him feel worse but I really need them out of my car.

My husband works into the evening most days and isn't home in time to have dinner with my four year old and I. Does anyone have any good recipes or ideas for dinner that are smaller portions? I dislike leftovers and my husband will hardly touch them.

I've tried talking to my husband numerous times regarding how I feel I don't get much support from him at home. I work full time and he works part time and I think that has bearing on how much he should be able to do during the day. The issue is that he doesn't do anything really. He'll do the dishes occasionally and take out the trash when it's overflowing but more often than not I have to ask him for help with these. If I ask him to do something he doesn't want to do he'll tell me that he'll do it and then will procrastinate for weeks. When I ask why he doesn't take responsibility for helping around the house and participating more when it comes to our daughter he says that I don't "let" him take responsibility. I do tend to override him on decisions when it comes to money or household stuff - because I'm the one that has to bear the brunt for responsibility for everything. How can I make him understand that when the portable air conditioner needs to be put in storage, or there's a dirty dish on the counter and I've already left for work I expect him to TAKE responsibilty for it because he is a part of a family and that kind of stuff is EXPECTED? Ever since I returned from deployment 3 years ago he's been like this. He's been diagnosed with depression and I can understand that he's been diagnosed but it's been 3 YEARS and he's not proactive with his doc. I can't understand if there's something wrong and he won't get it fixed. I feel like he's choosing not to try when he doesn't follow up with his doc. I resent him more and more everyday cause I increasingly feel like a single parent. I don't feel that I'm part of a team at all. I know that both of us need to change cause for right now I'm just the nagging ***** that he lives with but if I don't say something he does nothing and even when I do ask him for help it's about a 50-50 shot that it will happen. I'm at a loss for what to do here. When I talk nothing happens, when I don't talk nothing happens - what the hell am I supposed to do?

Someone else asked a Christmas present question and it got me thinking about what the hot toy is for this year. I live in Germany and don't see many commercials since we generally watch the Armed Forces Network channels. I know last year the hot toy was the Zhu Zhu Hamsters and I'm thinking of buying some of those for my daughter who will be four. Since I'm overseas I need to start thinking about Christmas early as I usually order toys online - buying them on the German economy is not an option when a Barbie is 30 Euro's (seriously!)

Parents - how do you feel about your child being put through one of the full body scanners? I'm flying through Heathrow in a few months with my daughter and passengers in Britain are prohibited from refusing the body scan if they are randomly selected. No scan, no fly and children are not excluded - as long as they can stand still for 5 seconds it's mandatory. There's a bill in progress right now that would make the body scanners mandatory in the US and make them the primary means of screening. Would you allow your child to be scanned by one of these machines?

My husband an I have had a few problems lately. He's depressed and I just can't understand how that effects him. I'm the type of person who believes that if you have a problem you fix it or you suck it up. He's been depressed for 3 years now and the fact that he's not at the doc every couple weeks to try and get this fixed leads me to believe it's just not that serious. I'm going to sign us up for counseling since I'm just fed up with him really not participating in the household.

Our current problem is that he sold his car a few weeks ago and has been looking for a new one already. He's looking for cars in our homestate and we live overseas. When we return to the US we will not be living in our homestate since I'm military. We already have to move two vehicles from our homestate to our next duty station (my practical grocery go getter and a truck that belongs to his dad). We also have to move all his tools because he was not comfortable putting them in government storage. He want to buy a 3rd vehicle and keep it at his parents house - which means we would have to move 3 vehicles. He keeps telling me that I don't have to worry about it and he'll move everything but I do worry about it. His plan is to rent a car trailer for the car he's buying and tow it down with the truck - his dad will drive my car down and I will fly down with our daughter. I asked him why he feels pressure to buy another car and he finally told me that he feels sad since he sold his car and just wants one at home to make him feel better. I think this is the silliest thing ever - it's just a car. Here's what I want to do: He drives the truck down and I drive the car down. We get to our next duty station and get housing, get my daughter established in daycare, find out if we even have the space for 3 vehicles - and then he can start looking for a new car. I've explained all this to him and he just keeps telling me to think about him buying a car now. I've made up my mind - it's stupid to buy a new car at this point when we don't even know where we're going to be living and if we'll even be able to keep it. I wanted to get outside opinions on what people think and see if anyone knows of any way to compromise in this situation.

I'm pretty much the primary caregiver for my daughter even though I work full time and my husband works part time. She goes to daycare m-f and we alternate pick up and drop off but I always get her ready in the morning. I'm the one that takes her to the park, activities, shopping etc. My husband seems rather indifferent when it comes to spending time with her. If I leave her with him to run errands he sits on the computer and she watches cartoons. She says that her daddy doesn't listen to her and doesn't love her. It's clear that there is a lack of bonding going on. I tell her that daddy loves her very much but it's gotten to the point that if he tries to do anything for her or even give her a hug that she says no and comes to me. I try to encourage her to let him help fix her plate or help her wash her hands but she throws a fit and he just gives up and turns her over to me. It doesn't help that whenever I ask him to do something to help me he makes these little sighs and unhappy noises like I'm totally putting him out by asking him to get her a bowl of grapes or something. I'm going to try to get us counseling as his lack of participation in the household and parenting duties is really putting a strain on our marriage. Has anyone been in a similar situation and been able to recover the marriage and the parent/child bond?

My husband and I have been married for 5 years. For 3 of those years we lived in our homestate and saw our families all the time. Well, for the past 2 years we've been living in Germany. I'm the military member and I'm used to being away from family - I consider my husband and our daughter my family and where ever we are is home to me. My husband is a civillian and in the past 2 years he's gone home 4 times (2 of those times were entire family trips.) Once again, he wants us all to go back to our hometown for a couple weeks. When we moved to Europe I wanted to travel and see Paris, Rome, and Athens - but all my husband wants to do is go back home! He says that he hates it here and he gets homesick still. He says that it will be better when we move back to the states, but we won't be stationed in our hometown again (that was a humanitarian assignment for me.) I am NOT happy with the way things are right now and my husband's "failure to adapt" to our first PCS away from our hometown. I was already in the military when we married, I gave him plenty of outs beforehand and I'm NOT planning on getting out. I've always been career minded and economically right now it would be stupid to get out. Does anyone out there think there's a possibility that it will get better when we get back to the US? Or will he continue being unhappy and depressed no matter where we are?

We rehomed our Beagle about 8 months ago due to my husband switching jobs and having to work the day shift. Buddy just wouldn't calm down when we left him at home alone and we were afraid of getting complaints. We live in military housing overseas (apartment style) and Buddy is just a few buildings away with another family. Well, now they have to rehome him due to getting complaints from neighbors. I'm friends with the family that took him in and I know they love him to death - but they can't afford to move off base. We can't either but I don't want to see him get passed from family to family. I posted an ad online in our local community looking for a dog sitter with the intent of bringing Buddy back into our home. The other family has tried an anxiety prescription from the vet and a sonic collar with no luck - nothing seems to work. Does anyone have ANY idea or tips on how to get my Buddy to calm down when he's alone?

LOL - Suggested Category - Sports - Swimming and Diving

Ok, long story short I failed my PT test 2 months ago. I have to retest on Monday and can't wait the full 90 days due to requesting an extension on my EPR - I had to test 3 days before my close out and the track was closed for 2 months prior due to weather. My supervisor hasn't even told me if I'll get the extension yet or not - my EPR isn't even done, but I need to test Monday because the regulation only allows for a 59 day extension in this circumstance. I've cut almost 3 minutes off my run time but still have problems with push ups and situps despite working like a dog for the past 2 months. I've lost 11 lbs and only a half inch off my waist so far - cutting another half inch off my waist gives me 3 points. Can anyone give me any tips for the next few days to help? I'm already planning on sweating in the sauna and doing low impact workouts to sweat as much off as possible but is there anything else that I can do?

My daughter is 3 1/2 years old and not completely potty trained yet. She's wearing real panties and was doing well for a few weeks. Suddenly she's having accidents almost every day. My daycare provider has told me in the past that my daughter has thrown a fit over having to wash her hands or eat with the other kids and has sat in the bathroom and cried for half an hour. When I picked her up one day last week she was sitting in the bathroom crying and as soon as I walked in the door she said she had peed her panties. It wasn't that bad, just a little damp so I went a head and changed her and took her home. Today when I picked her up she was in the bathroom crying and was so soaked that her socks were wet. The daycare provider told me she put her in the bathroom with a pull up and told her to change herself because she wasn't going to change her. She also told me that she'd been in there for half an hour. I understand that the daycare provider has other children to care for but I just can't see letting a 3 year old cry for half an hour. For the past few months my daughter has not wanted to go there in the morning, not screaming and crying but just whining. I feel uncomfortable taking her back there - am I over reacting? The day care provider emphasizes teaching independance but is she taking it too far? Or am I being an over protective mother of one?