Nerdlinger ~

I'm in my late 20s and I've never had a girlfriend or even a kiss, and no girls have ever shown any romantic interest in me. Most people get some kind of interest shown in them at some point in their lives, but not me.

I'm a big nerd but I try to look normal and I work out and try to look nice for the ladies. I'm a quiet person but I'm nice and can be funny after people get to know me.

How am I supposed to get a girlfriend at this age when I've got absolutely no experience? It gets pretty lonely at night. :(

And tell me why.

I enjoy watching terrible movies and marvelling at how awful they are.

This site is for answers only. Why are there so many questions here? If the questions think they are so mysterious, why do they spend so much time hanging around answers?

I think the questions secretly need answers; that's why they come here so much.

Just wondering.

Bonus Q: Have you ever mistakenly pepper sprayed an innocent man?

Just because you get it from a scripture doesn't mean it's not arbitrary.

Be honest now.

Would you advise a man to be a jerk to increase his chances?

Again, be honest.

Example: Someone like Homer Simpson who loves doughnuts would be forced to eat all the doughnuts in the world.

What's your punishment?

Or both?

Why does it so often happen that you cleverly answer someone who is obviously trolling, but you wake up the next day to find that you've been blocked and reported by that troll?

I thought they WANTED passionate answers to their crazy questions. Isn't that the definition of trolling?

I'm trying loosen the nut that is holding my shower head in place but it won't move at all. I used an adjustable spanner (wrench) and pliers; neither worked. I can't make them grip tightly enough to be able to apply torque, and they just slide on the nut when I try to turn it. How do I get this stupid thing loose?

Also state your political stance (eg. liberal, conservative, etc.).

I hear people using this as a euphemism for sex all the time, but I don't actually know what the story is. Do the bees have sex with the birds or something? This sounds like it would be horribly confusing for a child.

It seems that people are getting more and more polite every day. Today I saw someone drop a bag of fruits, and two people helped her to pick them up. Not so long ago something like this would have prompted people to gather round to point and laugh at her misfortune.

What ever happened to basic human incivility? And what can we do to stop this disturbing trend?

And don't say "none", because that's not one of the options I've given. Just play along.

And don't say "neither", because that's not one of options I've given. Just play along.

Or at least pretend to?

Also, would you offer people money to convert to your religion / non-religion?

(1) The anti-evolution, paranoid, Republican evangelical Christian of recent years, or

(2) the love-thy-neighbour, ultra-nice, bend-over-and-take-it Christian of old?

Please state whether or not you celebrate Christmas and your religion / non-religion.

(Non-Christians can answer too.)

And remain a vegetarian while in the military, of course. Do they accommodate vegetarians?

I'm referring mainly to western countries like Canada, USA, UK, etc.

(I'm not planning to join; I was just wondering)

- apart from the racism or xenophobia of the poster?

(Hussein here refers to Obama, of course)