Christine

A friend is getting married, his family is originally from India (but has been in various parts of the Middle East, with cousins all over the place). He and his fiancee are both Muslim, if that helps with sub-culture. What would be an appropriate gift to give? I'm assuming cash...

He gave a wrapped gift for our wedding.

I've been careful about my diet since going off the pill, because I used to have killer menstrual cramps. (I've filled a prescription for naproxen as well, don't worry). When I can I start on caffeine again? Is it ok once my cramps have passed, or should I wait until I've stopped menstruating this cycle? To clarify - I'm only going the no caffeine, no red meat, low sugar, avoid animal fats route between ovulation and menstruation.

I know that's a stupid question, but I honestly don't seem to be able to find it. I'm using index and middle fingers, squatting and pushing on my abdomen. Are there any other tricks? Is it possible that I just can't reach it? Is it likely that I can reach it but am just not realizing it's there, and if so, how do I tell where it is?

I'm not actually eligible for maternity leave (technically not employed, so I don't pay EI, so I can't collect, this is actually legal, I've looked into it), so I will be returning to full time work somewhere in the 4-8 month range. I've heard a lot of stories about people who tried to express but weren't able to keep it up, partly because of the pump. What would be a good, relatively inexpensive, pump with enough power to make pumping at work feasible? I'm willing to pay what is needed, but I don't want to go overboard, because after a point I'm no longer saving money.

Chemical food colouring is not an option. This is going to be fed to children, as well as two adults who have unusually strong reactions to certain colours (Tartrazine for sure, but we're not positive what else, and don't really want to have to test).

I'm planning on doing sugar cookies, and would like to colour the sugar. I can think of pomegranate juice for red, but everything else I can think of for colouring is either completely out of season or is savoury (onions, beets that sort of thing.)

To make it more fun: I have had a request for green, and chlorophyll isn't soluble, so it doesn't make a great dye. Any help?

I seem to recall when I was first diagnosed that if I lost weight it might help with other symptoms, but I can't find anything to corroborate this. Am I just remembering incorrectly?

Also, if I'm on hormonal birth control to deal with the symptoms, that only helps with irregular periods and the associated risks, correct? Otherwise unexplained weight gain could be from the PCOS still.

Just curious, because I remember hearing that the whole "separation of church and state" is done better there, and you MUST go to the registry office if you want civil benefits from a marriage. Does that mean that the only Roman Catholic nuptial service you can get is a convalidation of a marriage, or do they recognise that this is just a two-step process to get married, as long as you do all of it at the same time?

Or do they not worry at all over there about if you're already married, and just offer a marriage service for anyone who isn't already married in the church?

The sponge tore out of the metal bar that grabs onto it. I'd like to be able to just replace the sponge because it's a brand new mop.

i.e. how much less than the going rate am I paying if I go through the place where I bought my dress? They're reputable, and so they're charging the bridesmaid rate, even though it's a wedding dress, because it's from the bridesmaid line.

I recently discovered that they really mean it when they warn you not to use it if you have broken skin. (I was in a hurry and not thinking. Yes, this is related to my previous question). What do I do instead until everything's ok? Just the standard corn starch and baking soda, or is there anything easier I can do. I'm in the Northern Hemisphere, so it's the middle of summer here, and going without in a humidex of 30+ isn't really an option.

Oh, and I've heard of the baby powder option, but a) we don't have any around the house, and b) baby powder tends to be scented, so if I want to go to work that's not really an option.

What am I doing wrong if I'm drawing blood when I wax or sugar? When I tried the "wax" strips on my bikini line I had this problem, and again recently when I tried sugaring (the kind with the cloth strips) under my arms. I am being careful to only do a small area at a time, and to pull the skin taut. Anything else?

Oh... it also didn't remove the hair very well, if that gives any useful information about what's happening.

A friend of mine is getting married and has asked me to stand in the bridal party. I don't really want to give her a hard time about being a bridezilla, because I was a really awful one to have to work with when she was a bridesmaid for me. She has started to dictated how the bridesmaids look. As in she wants us to do our hair together. She tried to dictate what bra we could wear (she didn't give enough details and let us pick our own eventually). I intend to acquiesce to her request that I get my nails done, but I have issues. I don't like wearing gloves to do work in the kitchen, so I have some heavy-duty juice stains on the nails. Any suggestions for how I can get these off? Or should I be reminding her, even at this late date, that I'm a hoyden and she's asking quite a lot? (This would be because no matter how hard I try I'm unlikely to actually fit the mould she is trying to place me in)

We're only now getting around to our thank-you notes (in addition to moving I've also been settling into a new job right after the wedding, and my husband isn't able to help, hence it's been two months). I have one that I'm worried sounds too generic. The problem is that a couple I don't know, and am fairly sure I've never met (I would have been about 3 years old if I did meet them) sent a cheque. Neither of those leads to a proper note. Does anyone have any suggestions beyond the following:

Thank you very much for the cheque that you sent for our wedding. We appreciate that you were thinking of us. We are using the money towards furnishing our apartment.

My mother used to make a cucumber salad where she would lay down a layer of cucumber, cover it with salt, put another layer of cucumber, more salt and continue this until the bowl was full. After letting it sit she would drain the liquid off.

Does anyone know how long I need to let them sit? Should I be putting a dressing on them? Rinsing them? And finally, can I add onion before salting to this salad?

Thanks.

I pulled threads to make sure that I had a proper edge for the curtain itself, but I don't think I can do that with the lining. What I'm thinking is just cutting at 90 degrees to the selvedge. Is that good enough for the lining?

Given the tenor of the responses to the last time I asked this I have removed it, because it was apparently an incendiary question. By standing in a wedding, am I implying approval of the wedding, or does it just say that I approve of (and support) the marriage? I don't want to risk standing in appropriately, but I would hate to back out inappropriately.

A friend asked me to be a bridal attendant. Her wedding is soon, and it's really too late to back out if it's not necessary. My worry is that I'm picking up information that makes me question the wedding itself. Specifically, I'm afraid that the wedding is going to include giving away the bride. Is it still ok for me to stand in a wedding if something that I disapprove of so strongly happens?

And for those who are unfamiliar with the custom: at the beginning of the wedding, the officiant asks "Who gives this woman to be married'. The parents then consent to the wedding. This has been banned in many churches (for obvious reasons), but some don't like imposing restrictions like that, and it still gets done some places.

The shower in our apartment doesn't seem to have any way to turn the water down to a trickle so I can shave. The only way to turn the water off is to use the taps. This is just a real pain, and it takes a while for me to get the temperature right (two separate taps). I'm tempted to just leave the water on while I shave.

I tend to be fairly quick, and I'm thinking that the added convenience of not having to essentially take two showers balances the fact that I am saving a bit of water (not a lot of it, because I still need to turn the tap on every now and then while I'm shaving, because I don't have that proper trickle.

From what I can tell there's nothing more than anecdotal evidence that a gluten- and casein-free diet actually helps relieve the symptoms of autism. Studies seem to be split. I'm asking because I am considering putting myself (as an adult) on a gluten- and casein-free diet to see if it relieves any of my symptoms. I'm already off casein due to allergies, so not a big loss there.

So: can anyone tell me if there's really any value in the diets?

Does it help for extremely high-functioning individuals?

I had some odd responses to a question of mine, so now I'm curious. Have you ever heard of an invitation only wedding? For all I know these are common. I've only ever been to church weddings, however, and I can only think of one church that has closed worship services.