claude

I want to do a PGCE MFL at Roehampton but haven't got a good enough GCSE English. They told me to contact Equivalency Testing to do one of their tests, but now they say they don't accept their tests for English, only for Science and Mathematics & "there is no flexibility with PGCE entry requirements". I think it's now too late to do a GCSE before September. What can I do? Where do I stand legally?

I live in South London & love eating Gibanica which is made with cottage cheese and filo pastry but I'm trying to cut down on refined white flour. A friend of mine gets wholewheat filo in Novi Sad (Serbia) but that's too far to go each time I want some!

On Saturday I cleaned out my gerbil's cage, and put the gerbils in the bath. When I put them back in the cage I noticed smudges of blood in the bath and one of them had a cut on his scent gland. The cut is healing ok, and he seems fine in himself, but his scent gland seems swollen or enlarged a bit. Is this normal or should I take him to the vet? It's not a lot bigger than his brother's but as they're such small creatures it seems like more.

In my church, as in several other churches I've been to, the whole congregation will speak in tongues together. I don't understand why they do this, as to me it seems against the Bible in 1 Corinthians when it talks about order and says that one person should speak in tongues and then someone should give the interpretation, and also that if a non-believer came into the church when everyone was speaking in tongues, they wouldn't understand & might think the congregation were mad.

I'm just asking this so someone can explain why they think it happens. No silly answers please.

Read this aloud until you work out what it means:

Trees

Trees

Trees

Saying

Me

Had

Nut

This

Has

Long

How

Trees

Trees

Trees

I'm 12 stone and trying to lose weight but have only succeeded in gaining weight. When I have a meal it's generally healthy but I like chips, coke, cake and chocolate snacks too much and don't really like fruit. I don't really feel I have time to exercise as I work full-time and it then takes me 1.5hrs to get home, and often after work I'm too tired to do anything but do cycle on weekends. Although my man wants me to be thinner, he's not much help and expects me to get on with it. Please help.

I'm in admin, thinking about becoming a French/Spanish teacher in a secondary school, but have virtually no experience with teenagers. I used to teach young Spanish children English and have taught English to adults. I'm worried I won't connect with them and won't be able to keep order. I'm working full-time and so couldn't really volunteer during school hours. But I hate my current job and have always enjoyed teaching.

My TV's broken - the 'red' colours show as black and obviously all other colours are then distorted. Can this be repaired or is it easier to get a new one?

Hi, I want to know what people's favourite things are about London for my ESOL class. Thanks!

Why do people think they have to lock their children up or not let them walk to school on their own? Does no one know that a child is more likely to be abused by a family member or someone they know than by a stranger?

Two men were going for a job. The first man went in and they asked him the name of the current Queen of England.

"Elizabeth the First" he said.

"No, it's Elizabeth the Second."

So the first man goes back out and says to the second man

"They're going to ask you who the current Queen of England is, so I'll just write it on a card and you can pin it to the inside of your jacket"

So the second man goes into the interview room and they ask him, "who's the current Queen of England?"

He looks inside his jacket and replies

"Marks and Spencer".

When I was at Primary School, I had to learn a list of spellings every week. I now have good spelling and it infuriates me that people don't seem to care about spellings at all. Many teenagers I know don't understand why they shouldn't use text-speak in essays. A colleague just told me that she did some voluntary work in a primary school and they were not supposed to correct spellings. So, is spelling being taught in the UK now?

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

There were three men sat in a cave, and one of them said to another, "Hey, Dave, tell us a tale", and this is the tale he told...

At the beginning of the new year, the teacher asks the class to say their name & why their parents called them that.

-My name's George, I was born on St George's day.

-My name's David, I was born on St David's day.

-My name's Pancake....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The teacher next door gets her class to introduce themselves by saying their name and what they want to do when they grow up.

-My name's Sadie and I want to have a baby, maybe someday.

-My name's Proctor and I want to be a doctor and help Sadie have her baby maybe someday.

-My name's Tucker

-SIT DOWN TUCKER!

Can anyone give me some silly jokes, such as would be found in Christmas crackers, please?

Even Jehovah's Witnesses now accept organ donation (although not blood transfusion), so if you would accept a donated organ if you were ill, why is there a problem in donating them?

If, according to Christianity, you lost any organs, then surely they would be replaced in your resurrection body.

40% of the population have HIV/AIDS, and if nothing is done to help, the entire population will be dead by 2040.

Many children live on the streets and perform sexual favours for money or drugs.

Many young girls have a 'sugar daddy' that pays for school in return for sexual favours.

Average life expectancy is just 28.

Please can we do something to help this country?!

My friends and I can't play these files on our Linux or BSD computers, so please let me have some ideas on how to change the format and be able to watch it. Thanks.

In Britain there is currently a knife amnesty to get people to hand in their knives. The police are asking for the penalty for carrying a knife to be increased to 5 years, but where does this leave me, if I provide cake (and need a knife to cut it) to a couple of voluntary organisations that I work with, or if I need to buy a new kitchen knife?